Congratulations on your dad's recovery. As a cancer survivor, I relate. Thank you for sharing such a poignant personal take on the drama-watching experience.

Ah this is so beautifully written! Also, this post is making me want to seriously give Gaksital a second try!
I second the dramas as daily disposition supplements bit! Takes my mind off a lot of negativity that life could possibly offer!

I know this beanie's dad ended up okay (yay!) but I still cried with this post. While I don't have an ill family member or so, I've been on a bout of depression since who-knows-when. After not watching kdramas for three years (been watching since I was 10, stopped when I was 20), I found myself reaching out for my favorites (My Girlfriend is a Gumiho and Queen In-hyun's Man) last March just to feel happy. I wanted to get back to the happiness I felt all those years ago and I realized I was my happiest back when I was watching kdramas. And now I've been gobbling up kdramas left and right. I know it isn't healthy but sometimes you really just need those daily disposition supplements, as this beanie said. Now, I'm in between jobs and I'm planning on watching as much kdramas as I can before my new job starts this September. I do think I'm not that depressed anymore (?) or at least I'm handling it better. Still, so many thanks to kdramas for being something that made me feel an ounce of happy and for helping me escape that dreariness and gloominess.

Haha sorry for being such a downer meh

This is such a heartwarming post. Congratulations on your dad's recovery! I understand it wasn't easy because I also have a family member who's a cancer survivor. And thank you for sharing your experience with your personal life and kdramas with other beanies! ?

Pretty sure I knew of DB before Gaksital, but Gaksital is the one that kept me up at night while I viewed DB in the darkness of my room, staring at my phone. I just had to know that other people were feeling what I was feeling. Having such an experience is rare and it wasn't until Healer when it happened again. Healer actually revived my belief that I could still be moved by a drama and that's why it has such a special place in my heart. And while I still love dramas that appeal to the left side of my brain, there's something highly addictive about that drama that engulfs every part of you.

I am glad that your dad is doing better and hope he continues to become healthier.

Thanks for sharing your story.

This is a really poignant and touching piece of writing. Congratulations on your father's recovery. After my diagnosis of Peutz–Jeghers syndrome, I ended up watching light dramas for escapism and comfort but I also watched deep dramas about life and death to 'prepare' myself for what I thought would come, which I would also find rather life affirming as well. Like you, I tend to have very emotional moments after Korean dramas, crying a lot, I always wonder whether it is unhealthy to do so..But I always end up laughing about it later.

Ditto on Gaksital. It destroyed me in a way I could never imagine and I fell - kerthunk - madly in love with Korea, its people, its history, its culture. After more than 250 dramas over the past five years and a overwhelming love for k-pop that made me buy a ticket to the Billboard Music Awards to see BTS win, my love for all things Korean just keeps growing and growing...so much so that I am writing this in the Seattle airport, waiting for my second trip to Seoul. The first thing I always do when I get to Seoul is go to the Great King Sejong's magnificent statue on the plaza because why? Because of course Tree With Deep Roots destroyed me as much as Gaksital did. I am so happy to be alive in the age of internet!

Hoping for your dad's continued recovery. I can only imagine what you are going through. Thank you for sharing such a heartwarming article. I understand that kdramas can definitely lift one's mood. I also watch/rewatch the light and fluffy shows when I am feeling down. And it is a good escapist and that assurance that everything will turn out well.

Dear guest beanie, congratulations on your dad's recovery. I wish him (& you & your loved ones) a long & healthy life.

Thank you, Anonymous, for your beautifully written and poignant post. I've been in the same situation as you, however, without the kdramas. I hope your dad will continue to be in remission.

I certainly find that dramas help relieve the tension and give us a few hours respite from thinking over much. It's true that they can become addictive (together with reading up and commenting about them and downloading their osts, etc. ?), so it's good that it worked out for you.

Like you, I believe I also go into dramas by feeling or because of what I want to do with my mind. But since I have changeable feelings, not tied to specific occurrences, my watching is all over the place. Currently, when I want something light I may head for The Best Hit. When I want to work the brain cells it will be something like Forest of Secrets. And when I feel like I need more great relationships, I watch Suspicious Partner or Fight My Way and revel in the bromance and romance and group interactions. Anyway, watchable dramas are all good!!

All the best and take care of yourself! ?

I really loved reading about your journey...thanks for sharing!

I'm so glad your Dad is doing well!

This was a really nice post to read and I'm glad to hear your dad is doing so much better. I love the comparison of k-dramas to daily disposition supplements because I use them the same way. Kdramas have always allowed my mind to just /breathe/ after long, exhausting days and emotional upheavals.

Thank you for your post Anonymous, it's a lovely write-up. Glad your dad is doing well.

I can relate to watching an episode a day, I do the same. I supplement them with variety shows when I'm not watching a drama. I cannot go to sleep without watching one as I feel that I need that time of respite to switch-off from the realities of life. As someone who has an analytical personality where I tend to think through everything even while just lying down, I need that time where I don't get to think about life to relax ?

I felt the same way about Gakshital. Also, I'm so glad that your father is doing well :)

I just have to comment. You mentioned all my favorite dramas within your first paragraph. Gaksital is my all time favorite kdrama. It ran me through so many emotions. Thankfully me and my sister watched it together so we could be emotional over it together. Healer is my 2nd favorite, Princess' Man is my 3rd and I Can Hear Your Voice is 4th.

Also, I am happy to hear your father is doing well and recovering!

Thank you for the lovely post! Gaksital destroyed me too. I couldn't care less about the romance, it was the shipwrecked bromance that broke me in the end. Like you, "I never found anything to rival Gaksital for sheer emotional absorption". Kingdom of the Wind and Jumong come second and third, but I could never find the equivalent of Shunji in another drama. Maybe that's why I keep watching sageuks, in the hope of finding another powerful tragic relationship like it.

One of the best posts I've read, thank you for sharing.

I have also found my self binge watching rom-coms when I'm super stressed and thrillers when life is little more balanced. Dramas are great way to escape for a couple of hours or an entire weekend.

Such a heartwarming post. So glad to hear your dad is recovering well.
Isnt it amazing how kdramas have become a source of happiness and joy for most of us here. Sometimes there is no better medecine to shut your brain and watch an accidental kiss/ shower scene?

I can totally relate... Sadly, my mom lost the battle six years ago... But kdramas helped me to go through the most difficult times, when there was no hope left... and then through the first years after my mom left us...

My choice of a drama I watch often depends on my emotional status as well... and sometimes a mindless fluff can do wonders for a human psyche ;--)

The kdramas are the best antidepresants ever :--))

Ah, I do the same! The type of drama I watch is related to my mood. When I'm stressed out or feel down I need fluff, when things are going fine or life is uneventful I like dramas with a little bit more 'drama' to them - higher stakes, emotional rollercoasters and more complexity.

Escapist tendencies probably aren't that healthy, but nobody can be judged for wanting to watch something light every now and then to feel better if only for a little while.

Thank you. And yeah, somehow k-dramas can be cathartic in the best way, and when done right, make that much-needed twist of the pressure valve of feely feelings.

Thank you for sharing that story! *cries in the corner* I have a very soft heart when it comes to family members falling ill but I'm so glad that your dad is doing great now! I can fully relate in a manner that drama-watching can become a support system, I mean, I often work outside of the country away from family and I must say watching dramas is a big help to ease homesick and all. That's where that feelings you mentioned kicks in!

My feelings have feelings about this post: it really hits home. When a family member was diagnosed with cancer a few years ago, I took refuge in the Thai version of Full House. This year, an equally challenging crisis has arisen in my family, and I find myself avoiding many dramas (or sometimes, just particular episodes) that I would normally watch, and instead, seeking comfort, laughter, cathartic cries, and mirroring in low-stress dramas like Father Is Strange.

Maybe someday dramas will be recommended therapeutically based on their likely effects on one's mood. Need a boost of serotonin in addition to calming down your amygdala? Try these dramas... I'm sure many of us navigate Dramaland with an intuitive understanding of our neurotransmitter needs. (Just looking at that last screenshot of Lee Joon in love gives me a dopamine rush.)

Thanks, anonymous, for this very personal and well-crafted post. So glad to hear that your father is doing better.

Thank you for sharing -- I'm so glad to hear your dad is doing better!

I emphatise and absolutely use kdramas as an emotional outlet too. Although it works well too if kdramas make me happy when an epiaode is particularly squee-worthy!

I live in a high-stress workplace so I can't stand to watch backstabby betrayal dramas (Whisper, Imma looking atchoo), so light and frothy is my current crop.

Thanks to everyone's kind comments, I've emerged from a four-year shadow existence and have registered on Dramabeans.

Great to hear that your dad is doing well now. And this is such a heartwarming and beautiful post that I cant help but post.

Drama is also my coping mechanism, when life is tough (break ups, work stress, family stress) marathoning fluff drama is my best get-away-drug. Shut off my brain and just think about the characters and what a wonderful life and love that they love and enjoy ~

Not exactly a good thing to do, but it gives me a kind of Pause in life.

KDrama for ever!!

Beautifully said. I'm so glad you said your Dad is in a reprieve....my feelings were anxious. I, too, find that my drama watching/enjoyment varies strongly based on what is going on in my life. I feel things a little too much at times and so I've avoided Gakitsal since you, any many others, say it has wrecked you so much and well (obviously a well done show to elicit such deep emotions). I could so relate to your description of that one hour allowing you to shut your mind off and escape away. It's like you reached in and described the last 3 or 4 years for me :) Praying all continues to go well for you and your Dad.

Guest Beanie, your writing skills are not to be "anonymus" whatsoever!
Beautiful your contribution. And whoever you and your dad are, i hope he is doing everyday better.
When someone has a cancer, the body needs lots of oxigen, vitamin C, water and all natural ways possibles of detoxing. A bad with seasalt every day... coffee enemas and so on.
In regard to our versatile and vaste amount of Kdramas, i am with you in going from one to another, although my favorite group is limited than yours.
Anyway, like the Germans would say: "Viel Spaß!"

Such a moving piece and so beautifully written, it really spoke to me. My niece introduced me to kdrama few months ago, now the only thing I watch are kdrama romcoms. Binge watching dramas have been perfect in seeing me through hard times on my own recovery from cancer. My love for them amuses my family no end. I haven't been able to articulate to them why, but your changing tastes experience has expressed it perfectly. And Gaksital is definitely on my avoid list..well at least for the present.

I FEEL YOU about those saguek.

I was D E A D after Gaksital. I can't find anything that comes close to the emotional drainage I felt after that drama. A good story and actors (some) can do wonders. I think Mirror of the Witch was the only one that came close. UGH WHAT A SHOW.

I'd glad you're dad is doing well! I started kdramas in college and would watch episodes the day they're released. It was a nice break from schoolwork and I liked watching dramas that featured characters who looked a little bit more like me and whose attitudes and values felt more relatable. I was also into romance novels too and kdramas were like live action romance novels. I commented a fair bit on dramabeans during that time. After I graduated college, I would binge a series here and there, but mostly stopped watching things live. Also stopped commenting. I actually got into American tv shows.

I found this year unsettling and depressing (moving out from my parents house, family member who never blamed me for my bad behavior died, close co-workers and friends leaving for other parts of the country, the election, the political climate of my country, reading more depressing news), so I'm on a kdrama and commenting binge now. This time around, I'm not so much seeking familiarity, but an escape and being able to see honorable characters win out against malicious ones.

BIG thanks to everyone that's sharing!
Community is a beautiful thing <3

*claps* great post!
I also know from this that I am SO gonna enjoy Gaksital, when I get down to it on my list! :)