Kill Me, Heal Me: Episode 20 (Final)
by Saya
This long denouement is an answer to the difficult and painful truths we’ve had to deal with so far. It’s an episode full of substance, and takes its time to craft a fitting send-off to the characters we’ve grown to love, as well as the ones we decidedly didn’t. Bittersweet crosses to simply sweet, as we circle back to what this story is really about — not company politics, not revenge or retribution, but just how two children overcame abuse to find a way to exist in the world without carrying the burdens of their past.
With all the intense character moments and the inevitable goodbyes, keep your tissues handy. There’s going to be lots of things in all your eyes. Thank you all for your patience! Now let’s ride this train together one last time.
FINAL EPISODE RECAP
Ri-jin shows Dr. Seok CCTV footage of the new alter, “Mr. X,” which shows a caped figure enter her room. She tells him how Perry Park left for good, and Dr. Seok replies that it’s possible the new alter arose in response. He says that Mr. X could either be a helper personality who will facilitate the treatment, or the opposite.
Do-hyun stops short when he finds his office occupied. In a magician’s cape and top hat, the new alter invites Do-hyun to open a briefcase. Do-hyun looks away in confusion, but when he looks back, the room is empty. Do-hyun, eyes wide, tells Chief Ahn that he thinks he saw Mr. X, in a bout of co-consciousness. His head rings sharply, and the chief anxiously takes him home.
Now recovered, Do-hyun works from home, and his diligence surprises Chief Ahn. The chief has other news for Do-hyun. He reveals that Min Seo-yeon’s driver, who was new that day, got the job under the auspices of Do-hyun’s dad.
The shock of the news brings on the telltale ringing. Fighting the pain, Do-hyun tells the chief to secure the driver’s testimony immediately — he needs to know the truth.
Alone, he remembers little Ri-jin showing him her locket. The pain, insistent, takes him again.
Ri-jin catches “Princess Yo-na” sneaking out to Oppa, decked in her new pink headband. They scuffle and Yo-na calls out, “Mr X!” which gets Ri-jin’s attention quick. Just for lols, Yo-na hawks a gobbet of gum right into Ri-jin’s face. Laughing her head off, she refuses to divulge the secret for free…
Ri-jin bursts into Ri-on’s room and rattles off a profuse apology, promising to spend her whole life atoning. Horrified understanding dawns on him when Yo-na bounds in. Ri-jin shuts the door (“I’m sorry Oh Ri-on, forgive me Oh Ri-on, I love you Oh Ri-on”) but Yo-na locks them in. Oh my days.
She tackles him onto the bed. Trapped, he wails and flails while she toys with him, a cat preying on a mouse. Poor molested Ri-on, I’m (not) sorry you’re suffering for my lols!
She makes him sit still, and sings him “Oppa, Cheer up,” the Yo-na version (based on children’s song “Cheer Up, Dad“) but HAHAHA, “Oppa, cheer up! Yo-na’s going to… give you a kiss~!” Ri-on desperately blurts that he’s leaving for army service. She sobs — for about two seconds, and threateningly holds up a copy of his 2010 discharge papers, the evidence of his lie.
She proceeds to take a million selcas of herself with Oppa, and you can’t blame him if his smile is more of a grimace. No fight left in him, he submits to her kisses.
Ri-jin still has her ear to the door when Yo-na whips it open, waving a prize photo of Oppa. Ri-jin gasps at her brother’s kiss-covered face while he flails and sobs even more, convinced he’s ruined for life. Ri-jin, are you laughing at Oppa?
Ri-jin comes to collect on her promise from Yo-na: What does she know about Mr. X? Yo-na cryptically tells her to smile brightly: “Mr. X disappears when you become happy.” But that’s all she’ll say.
Yo-na claims the bed for the night, and this time Ri-jin lets her. They settle down to sleep. In her tough-girl way, Yo-na speaks: “For treating me like a friend, thank you. And for treating me like a sister, thank you. For granting my wish today, thank you. Just… thanks for everything.”
Ri-jin sits up, recognizing it’s a goodbye. Eyes full, Yo-na tells her she was the first girl she met who could fight. She tells Ri-jin to be well, and closes her eyes. Ri-jin watches over her.
Yo-sub calls Yo-na to him. Ri-jin noona is at Do-hyun hyung’s side now, he tells her. They have to go so the couple can be at ease. Yo-na runs past him crying, and dissolves in a spray of pink. There’s something in my eye.
Yo-sub quotes French poet Paul Valéry: “The wind is rising. We must try to live.” He adds, “Goodbye, noona. Thank you.”
Then he, too, dissolves into the breeze.
Do-hyun wakes up with Yo-na’s headband in his hand. He knows what it means, and carefully folds away her pink blazer for the last time.
Ri-jin sniffles in front of her mirror, hands over her face. She tells him Yo-na left, “After doing this” — and shows him her face. HAHA. Yo-na gets the last penultimate laugh after all, because across Ri-jin’s forehead, thoroughly misspelled, she’s scribbled “vicious chick.”
Ri-jin bawls that she fell asleep for just a moment, and that’s when Yo-na left. Do-hyun consoles her by calling her “unni” in Yo-na’s voice, telling her she’ll mess up her makeup.
In the hospital, Do-hyun’s dad opens his eyes. Do-hyun gets the news from Chief Ahn, who adds that Dad wants to atone for the past, and so wants to see Ri-jin and his son together. Do-hyun hurries from Ri-jin’s house, saying he’ll see her at his house later.
While he drives, he clutches his ringing head, roiling with suspicions of Dad’s involvement in Min Seo-yeon’s death.
At Do-hyun’s house, Ri-jin finds a lump hiding under the covers in her room. She peels the cover back and is greeted by Se-gi’s giant teddy bear. From behind it, Do-hyun peeks out. He gazes at her with limpid eyes, and waves the bear’s paw. Realization dawns, and Ri-jin tentatively asks, “Nana?”
She says the bear’s name is Nana, and Ri-jin finishes — her name is Cha Do-hyun, isn’t it? We see the little girl now, and Ri-jin tells her she knows, “Because you… are me.” She explains that she’s little Do-hyun’s adult self, and little Do-hyun is her child-self. She lovingly tells her younger self how happy and loved she is now, “So much that it overflows.”
She wants to say one more thing: Back then, when that ajusshi was angry, it wasn’t because she did anything wrong. Telling her not to be scared or hurt anymore, she reassures the little girl that it’s okay for her to go now. She’ll look after Cha-gun.
But little Do-hyun can’t go alone because she doesn’t know the way. She asks Ri-jin to call Mr. X. But who is Mr. X? “My daddy,” the little girl replies.
A memory. The two children draw pictures on the basement floor, and little Ri-jin looks longingly towards the door. If her dad were there, she says, they could get out. Do-hyun tells her he heard her dad was dead, which makes her cry. Do-hyun, you heartbreaker. He quickly takes it back — of course he’ll come. He paints a comforting promise of her father watching over her from the heavens.
Do-hyun jolts awake, bear in hand, while Ri-jin watches over him. He asks if Nana was there, and she wordlessly pulls him into a hug. “For your mind splintering again because of me, I’m sorry, and sorry again. But thank you,” she says. At last, she grasps the extent of his pain, she tells him, and how much hope he gave her — he really did save her. She cries into his shoulder, grateful that they got to meet again, so she could say those words.
Do-hyun is still tortured by the fear that his father killed Ri-jin’s mother. In his bathroom, co-consciousness strikes once again as Mr. X appears in the mirror. Once again, he invites Do-hyun to open the box. This time, Do-hyun steels himself and opens it.
There’s only a teddy bear inside, and it’s not frightening at all (unless you’re the bear). Mr. X proves his point that until Do-hyun looks for himself, he won’t know whether what’s inside is gold or a bomb.
“The extent of my imagination decides the size of my fear,” says Mr. X. Do-hyun realizes that means he has to go check the facts himself. Mr. X encourages Do-hyun to confront his past, and spend his imagination on his future.
From Nana’s memories, he now knows who Mr. X is. Mr. X says he took on this form because that’s how Do-hyun made him. As for why he looks like a magician, Mr. X says that must be how a kid imagines a dad. He quips that Do-hyun has no idea how glad he is that he’s not Superman.
Eyes full of conviction, Do-hyun tells Mr. X that he will protect Ri-jin from now on, and get stronger. Do-hyun tells him he can rest easy now, and Mr. X agrees. A moment later, Do-hyun is alone — surprised, but content.
Do-hyun stands by his father’s bedside. Dad sits up and asks if he’s Joon-young. He marvels that he’s completely grown up, and wants to see him better. Wasting no words, Do-hyun tells Dad that being in a coma for so long didn’t erase his sins and turn him into a victim. He’s only here to find out if Dad was responsible for Grandpa’s and Min Seo-yeon’s deaths.
In a private meeting between the family execs, Ki-joon begins a speech to Grandma about Do-hyun’s job capability. Unfazed, Do-hyun interrupts to ask if it’s about his DID. Uncle and son look smug, but Do-hyun counters with his own concerns about Uncle.
His father revealed that Uncle had bribed the driver to delay the two from leaving the country that day. The accident that killed them was pure misfortune. Dad admits that he covered up his findings at the time because he coveted the chairman’s seat. Do-hyun tells his uncle that Dad kept a recording of an incriminating conversation between the two of them. The transcript Grandma has in front of her is that conversation, he says. She looks at Uncle with horror.
Uncle scoffs that that won’t stop Do-hyun’s secret coming out. But Do-hyun has more dirt on him — reams of documents prove he embezzled company money, as well as laundering money via his wife’s gallery. Even Ki-joon looks shocked now.
Do-hyun rejects Uncle’s offer to compromise by hiding each other’s flaws. His secret won’t land him in jail, whereas Uncle’s definitely will. Ki-joon is stricken and Grandma steps in. To protect the company, she offers to cede Seungjin to Do-hyun. Uncle sweeps out, defeated and indignant, and Ki-joon follows.
Grandma says that Do-hyun was right — he’s not a monster. The monsters were other people. She almost smiles at him, in what must be the first time in 21 years. She urges him to get treatment and recover: She’ll protect Seungjin for him until he comes back.
Chief Ahn tells Do-hyun that Ri-jin went to see his father. As he’s about to run out, he’s struck by the pain in his head again.
Ri-jin steps into the room, and Dad is affected by her resemblance to her mother. He kneels at her feet. Eyes brimming, he thanks her for being alive. He knows his sins against her were too great to carelessly ask forgiveness, but he woke up, he says, out of his earnest wish to atone to her.
Do-hyun bursts in, except he’s Se-gi, and he’s livid. Does Dad want forgiveness? Crouching to be eye-level with him, Se-gi grabs Dad in a choke and spits at him to die — to disappear from the world as quickly as possible.
Looking into Se-gi’s face, Dad’s mind goes back to the fire, and the memory of little Joon-young/Se-gi’s face then. He seems to realize something.
Ri-jin urges Se-gi to stop, and finally pulls him away. Standing between father and son, she tells Dad that his forgiveness will have to wait. If she tries to forgive him, it will be for the sake of this person, she says, indicating Se-gi. This person, who, instead of Dad, spent his whole life protecting her and being in apology to her.
To Se-gi, she says the words he last said to her, to run away anywhere — away from their scary memories. She tugs him out with her. Alone, Dad is racked with sobs.
Se-gi and Ri-jin ride away on a motorbike, and in a voiceover, she asks him what present she can get him. His answer is simple: “You.”
They light sparklers together in the twilight. Full of sad bravado, Se-gi tells her he’s thinking about how he can make time stop, or somehow stay with her forever. Eyeing her suspiciously, he turns away, convinced she wants him to disappear.
She coaxes him to look at her. With a steady gaze, she tells him that he was the first person to say her word was law. He hangs on the word “person,” noting that she finally came to see him as his own person, not just an alter. But until she sees him as a man, he doesn’t think he can go.
He asks for his present. She steps up to him, and kisses him. For everything he did for her, this was the only present she could think of, she says. Gruff, he tells her it was a good choice — unsurpassable. He pulls her in again for a deeper kiss.
We get a montage of Se-gi’s memories with Ri-jin: There’s their first kiss in the pumpkin-carriage; then, when he asked Ri-jin to run away with him, and just now, when Ri-jin asks him to run away with her. Entreating Ri-jin not to kill him is overlapped by the memory of her taking his hand.
Face to face in their mental ether, Do-hyun asks Se-gi why he’s leaving if he doesn’t want to. Se-gi shrugs that he isn’t needed anymore. He calls him “Cha-gun,” and threatens to come back and take over Do-hyun’s body and time if he becomes a weakling again, “So it would be good if you lived well.”
They share crooked half-smiles, although Do-hyun is sniffing back tears. He extends his fist to Se-gi for a bump, and for a second, Se-gi flexes his fingers and you think he’s going to leave him hanging. Oh Se-gi, you make me laugh at the same time as you make me cry. They touch knuckles, and Se-gi charges him again to live well.
But Do-hyun has one more thing to say: “Shin-gun. You’re… me.”
“I’m… you,” he replies, “So live with style.” They hold each other’s eyes, and the tattoo fades.
Do-hyun releases Ri-jin. Tears stream down her face, and Do-hyun smiles at her through his own tears. Holding her face between his hands, he wipes her cheeks. This time as himself, he kisses her again, wrapping his arms around her.
One year later.
Ri-jin takes a break from work in the hospital staffroom. She reads an ad for Omega’s new bestseller, “Kill Me, Heal Me.” Her eyes widen at the tagline, “A romance between a DID chaebol and a female doctor.”
She remembers when Ri-on asked her if he seemed like the type to profit from another’s misfortune. “Yes! That’s exactly what it looks like,” she growls, cursing out her absent brother. Haha!
Ri-on’s busy scoping out how his book is doing — incognito, of course. Another customer (cameo by SNSD’s Yuri) snatches up the copy he was reaching for, and cajoles Ri-on to let her have it — it’s a copy with a hidden message from the author inside.
He perks up at her fangirling, and offers her a pen dug out from his pocket. It was a gift from Writer Omega, he says, and claims to be a distant relative. She immediately asks him out for coffee, and he introduces himself as “Oh Hui” (his ladies’ man persona).
“I’m Yo-na,” she says. “Ahn Yo-na.” HAHAHA. Horrified Ri-on can’t run away fast enough. The girl gives chase, calling for Oppa.
Do-hyun splits wood and Ri-jin’s dad complains he’s making tinder of it. Dad grumbles to Mom, but she’s firmly on Do-hyun’s side — he’s so handsome, the (female) customers just come rolling in. She wonders if it’s time to matchmake “Perry” and their daughter, but Dad protests — that guy’s been unemployed for a year!
That unemployed guy is on the phone right now, talking shop with Executive Director Ahn (ha, what is your hair?). The director tells him Grandma is waiting for him to come back, but Do-hyun is satisfied with his present life. “Here, each day is new and happy,” he tells him.
Do-hyun lies in the sun, eyes closed, when Ri-jin’s shadow falls across him — the opposite of the shadow that haunted their childhood memories. She joins him, and they lie side by side. She playfully scolds him for being carefree by himself when it’s his girlfriend’s day off.
He produces a box, and shows her a pair of couple rings. Although she plays hard to get (again, lol), she happily submits when Do-hyun puts one on her. She does the same for him, and they hold up their hands to admire them.
“Couple rings are the sweetest handcuffs in the world!” Ri-jin squees. The rings glint in the sun, and they twine their pinkies together in a wordless promise.
Do-hyun narrates in voiceover: “Within each person’s heart is a dark basement. If you look away or stand by, that darkness thickens. You must summon your courage to go down and turn on the light. If you’re scared to go alone, you can hold someone’s hand.”
Little Do-hyun and Ri-jin hold hands. Laughing and smiling, the children walk together into a brightly lit room, as adult Do-hyun’s narration continues: “If I’m with you, I’m not afraid.”
The couple lie together on the grass, hands entwined and eyes closed, smiling.
COMMENTS
OMG the credits! I thought I was ready to let this show go AND THEN YOU GO AND DO THAT. There are so many things in my eye right now, like my HEART. I don’t know where to start. I don’t want to finish.
That ending scene sums up one of the things I love most about Ri-jin and Do-hyun’s relationship. It characterizes how they do everything important: mutually, and without ceremony. They don’t seek recognition or validation from anyone but each other — that’s all they need, and that’s I’ve had so much confidence in them.
Grandma’s turnabout was a little too pat, but I suppose we can account for it by saying getting her son back softened her up (huh). But the show makes the point that even in accidents where no one person is to blame, everyone has some responsibility. Although the situation that led to the children’s abuse and its subsequent cover-up was a string of unfortunate accidents, the abuse itself was anything but. So Do-hyun’s dad got a fitting end. Redemption and forgiveness aren’t free, you don’t get them because you want them — you have to consciously earn it. Bluntly put, it was unfair of Dad to put Ri-jin in that position, when he knelt to her. Remember how she told Do-hyun she can’t refuse people’s requests? The conflict is evident in her face at that moment, and Se-gi’s timely arrival is one more way he saves her, because she wasn’t ready to forgive him, but she seemed on the brink of having her hand subtly forced.
She’s able to return the favor a moment later when she puts herself between Se-gi and Dad — not to save Dad, but to save Se-gi from becoming that person. And yet, there’s something pitiful about Dad’s agony that twists your heart. It’s the punishment I wanted, but it doesn’t really give me any pleasure. I’ll forgo the discussion about whether his revival was unnecessary, because it was important for them to look their monster in the eye, and cut their nightmares down to size.
But the best thing that came of it was the radical shift in how Ri-jin conceives Se-gi. In every previous occasion of Se-gi getting violent, she calls for Do-hyun. But for the first time, she calls Se-gi’s name — instinctively trusting that he’ll respond to her. Se-gi’s desires have always been simple: to protect Ri-jin, and to be recognized and loved by her. Once fulfilled, he’s at peace. He’s the only one so much part of Do-hyun — the first to come and the last to go, his equal and opposite — that he doesn’t dissipate. He’s folded into Do-hyun’s consciousness, in a way that is both not there, and yet always there. That’s why Ri-jin is able to kiss him – because he is Do-hyun, and Do-hyun is him.
As hilarious as Yo-na has been, until now, she felt like a one-note character, milked only for the comedy. But her send-off gave her the depth she needed, while staying true to her feisty, uncomplicated nature. Her sorrow at leaving and her gratitude for being known were achingly sweet, underlaid by a wholehearted love for Ri-jin that only showed itself now. It’s amazing that Yo-na was completely real to me: Ji Sung made me believe he was a teenage girl. And then he made me cry. (Give this man an award already!)
I wasn’t sure how Mr. X would work as a last-minute introduction, but thankfully, he didn’t bring any game-changing elements. On the contrary, as a completely new alter, Mr. X serves to remind us that Do-hyun absorbing his alters and gaining a measure of stability doesn’t mean he gets a magical “cure.” His vulnerability continues to exist, but he’s chosen a path of accepting it. This episode in particular took care to highlight to us the nature of his inner world. Every time he blinks and finds himself alone in an empty room, it’s a jarring and sudden reminder that his encounters with his alters are events in his consciousness, without any outer reality.
With each departure, Do-hyun’s sense of peace grows palpably, and you can see the complicated blend of sadness coupled with satisfaction. It’s an effective reminder that the characters that were so real and lovable to us were, nevertheless, products of a broken mind. Ri-jin legitimately grieves for each one, but their grief isn’t the same. I want to hold on to what he implied to Se-gi — “gone” doesn’t mean “dead.” They’re dormant inside his living mind, so they’re never dead. But I am sad that we had to wait twenty episodes to get some real Se-gi x Do-hyun bromance, and then it didn’t last longer. Like, you know, forever.
Looking back on the show as a whole, it has been so consistently satisfying that I don’t really want to pick at its flaws (although I do want to know what happened to Do-hyun’s mom while everyone else got their adieus…). Kill Me, Heal Me always chose to tell the most interesting story, with style and self-awareness — I don’t know if I’ve ever seen a chaebol drama relegate corporate machinations to little more than a tertiary storyline. It felt like the writer knew what she was doing 99% of the time, and it showed in the effortless subversions and fluid tonal shifts, attention to detail, and an overall intricacy in its construction.
The message the show leaves us with is no less satisfying — that it’s vital to depend on our loved ones, and to seek out the truth despite our fears. We’re never so broken that we can’t be helped. While the illness doesn’t always have a cure, it does always demand love, and willingness to go on the journey.
RELATED POSTS
- Kill Me, Heal Me: Episode 19
- Kill Me, Heal Me: Episode 18
- Kill Me, Heal Me: Episode 17
- Kill Me, Heal Me: Episode 16
- Kill Me, Heal Me: Episode 15
- Kill Me, Heal Me: Episode 14
- Kill Me, Heal Me: Episode 13
- Kill Me, Heal Me: Episode 12
- Kill Me, Heal Me: Episode 11
- Kill Me, Heal Me: Episode 10
- Kolorful Palette: Split [Kill Me, Heal Me]
- Kill Me, Heal Me: Episode 9
- Kill Me, Heal Me: Episode 8
- Kill Me, Heal Me: Episode 7
- Kill Me, Heal Me: Episode 6
- Kill Me, Heal Me: Episode 5
- Kill Me, Heal Me: Episode 4
- Kill Me, Heal Me: Episode 3
- Kill Me, Heal Me: Episode 2
- Kill Me, Heal Me: Episode 1
Tags: featured, Hwang Jung-eum, Ji Sung, Kill Me Heal Me, Park Seo-joon
Interview with Kim Yoo-jung
Hello Dramabeans series
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51 girlinterrupted
March 17, 2015 at 6:09 AM
This show is multi-layered, but all heart. It will most definitely remain as one of my all-time favorites.
Thanks Saya and Purplecow for the recaps!
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52 NahlaJW
March 17, 2015 at 9:01 AM
Oh God I was thinking that Saya will upload the recap today before the next episode is up tomorrow. Now I realise that there is no next episode *going to a corner to cry* ?
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redfox
March 17, 2015 at 9:57 AM
*evil but comassinate laughter*
poor you go watch the BTS
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lara4liwa
March 17, 2015 at 5:21 PM
join *going to a corner to cry* huaaaaaa
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53 pogo
March 17, 2015 at 9:23 AM
I'm just all squealing and flails right now, because I LOVE THIS DRAMA and didn't want it to end, but it has! I remember two months ago, when the casting was going round and round and this looked like a mess in the making because how on earth would you even write or act out 7 personalities.....who knew it would be one of my two favourite 2015 shows?!
I'm the first one to admit KMHM has imperfections, but somehow those flaws don't seem to matter in the face of all the ways in which this drama is awesome. I loved that we got a hero who was kind and decent and a good person in every way, and that his personalities were not the five-minutes-of-screentime gimmick I thought they'd be. I love that we got a heroine who isn't a pushover or a Candy, but behaves like a normal person, not a kdrama 'average girl'. And I loved the relationship they built and the way it progressed and helped them get over their past - it was especially cool how Do-hyun's personality actually changed little by little as he began absorbing the alters.
(and I cried hard when they all went. No more Perry, Yo-na, Yo-sub, or Se-gi? And Se-gi's farewell *sob*)
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pogo
March 17, 2015 at 9:25 AM
oh, and a huge THANK YOU to purplecow and Saya for the recaps! You guys made the experience even better, thank you for all the hard work.
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pogo
March 17, 2015 at 9:26 AM
And oh yeah, THAT ENDING SPEECH IN CHARACTER omg.
Just kill me now. And give Ji Sung all the Daesangs while you're at it! (and all the love to Hwang Jung-eum too)
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redfox
March 17, 2015 at 12:19 PM
I loved the fact that Do Hyun was a decent person and that noble idiocy that kicked in in ep 16 or so, it really didn´t seem to fit, but I guess it was the guilt and all.... except he gave a promise and I almost got angry for not sticking to it, but then they actually referred back to that promise later. to overcome no matter what.
and what I most loved was this drama had a very direct and deep connection to the viewers. it seemed like they kept fulfilling everything we dreamed about. you say "I wish this would happen" and it does. like a magic well.
the director seemed like a crazy hilarious person from the BTS the kind that goes along with all the wild suggestion and adds his own.
and Ji Sung should direct something - so much ad-lib, so much involvement in planning out the scenes to the last detail! he has talent in that.
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Daehoney
March 17, 2015 at 8:33 PM
The director is hilarious! He suggested SeGi's rolling chair with a poker face, and I heard the Yona-Rion kiss adlib was a suggestion from the director also.
And, don't forget that the director also took pictures in photobox in RJ-SG date! The production team seems really close and crazy (in a good way). They even name the production team "Kill, Heal" that's why fans complement it by creating "Me, Me". Oh I love them
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thursdaynexxt
March 18, 2015 at 5:56 AM
Yes, Se Gi's rolling chair! I will never get tired of watching him wriggle his chair back into that meeting room!
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sancheezy
March 18, 2015 at 8:37 PM
right, I saw the BTS and they talked a lot on how the director want the shoot and how the actor try it
I also see the hug in the end of ep 18 and I like the way they discuss about it
the cast also give another advise about the scene, like HJE in yo-na or how ri-on need to act for yo-na
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redfox
March 17, 2015 at 12:50 PM
and you were not the only one who did not want it to end, in a youtube clip actors were saying how they would do it for another 10 episodes if they could, and "Dr seok" was crying. with "Sec Ahn" comforting. and "Ri Jin Dad" was saying something like "my parts might not have been very interesting, but the whole drama together was so memorable he wants to preserve it carefully in his mind" like, awww!!!!
Imma cry again. I am not helping any, am I? Just induce more tears.
I think we need to go to Lee Jun Ki ninja class and break some tiles to keep our mind busy...
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54 faranak
March 17, 2015 at 9:30 AM
I loved loved loved the part of segi so much,i love him so much he is so great he is better than cha do hyuon in dome aspects,and ahn yona funny personality,i really miss yo na she was funny beatiful and cutr though,the goodbye parts of segi and yona were so tear droping,and so memorable,i will realy miss this drama,it was so great and i am sure that no one but ji sung could do this charachter and i am so happy that lee seung gi couldnt make it i like him but it was a solid and hard charachter so he wasnt good enough yet,and even hwang did her best,but the plot of her charachter was in some parts lacking,ji sung and hwang had a great and hot chemistry,and i really adore ji sung for his acting thank you all guys for recaps and your great cms,+ in last scene filming ji sung actually cried
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55 lc
March 17, 2015 at 9:41 AM
This is one k drama in a very long time that I can fully enjoy from beginning to end.
Before Kill Me Heal Me:
Ji Sung - heard of him, found him good looking, but sorry won't find the time to watch any of his dramas.
Hwang Jung-eum - heard of her, but also won't be watching any of her shows
Now, after KMHM, I'm completely SOLD on both of them! Will definitely look forward to their projects in future!
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lara4liwa
March 17, 2015 at 5:10 PM
you should check their collaboration before this in Secret, I'm sure you will love them more and more
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Daehoney
March 17, 2015 at 8:37 PM
Me too. I knew Jisung as LBY's husband. I've only watched him in Running Man and Good Friends and yeah, he seems to be a nice and calm person but I was not interested in watching his dramas.
And to be honest, I've never heard of Hwang Jung Eum before. It's because I'm not a drama addict, so I just watch if there is interesting hype, the exact reason I started KMHM.
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sancheezy
March 18, 2015 at 8:41 PM
save the last dance for me - jisung drama
it when he is 24, out in 2004
I think he is sweet there even though the plot is amnesia and yeah, I think it better try
since secret is also not everyone taste, I love secret but I knew the plot is makjang with a lot of tears,
at least I'm gonna tell you both end in happy ending
for PtB, -jisung, his bromance with Jaejoong is what I truly loves
HJE is kind of tricky, she works lot of project and sometimes I hate her character or the plot, but I always can see her other side in other project as sweet or strong, or funny lady, so.........I think it perfectly normal to like her drama or not (as happen in me, I can't like all of her work, but I like her)
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56 Efya
March 17, 2015 at 10:18 AM
Great cast,great script,great acting...gosh this drama was perfect
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57 Odessa Jones
March 17, 2015 at 11:25 AM
Thank you, Saya! I totally didn't notice that Oh Ri Jin calls Shin Segi by name in the final episode. And I also loved Sec. Ahn's hair in the final scene! Thanks for all the details and the great screencaps, too.
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58 me
March 17, 2015 at 12:08 PM
Lovely final recap Saya....made me go back and rewatched scenes from the last episode for the nth time after reading your insights.
Also, want to thank Purplecow too!!:)
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59 redfox
March 17, 2015 at 2:08 PM
ahhh, yes! I was looking for sound clips of the OST and this particular music that often accompanies Se Gi.
I found a ringtone here:
http://ringtone3.net/tone/kill_me_heal_me_ost.html
and that clip is "Freak"
if you want to listen or take with you....
I think that music suits me when I enter a new place....
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redfox
March 17, 2015 at 2:13 PM
ahh damn, "no matching ringtone" for the clip Freak. but I love it anyway
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sancheezy
March 18, 2015 at 8:42 PM
oooooh...ooooh
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60 Deemarie
March 17, 2015 at 4:41 PM
Ri Jin is in my top 5 kdrama heroines of the century! I really appreciate dramas where the heroine is not just a wilting, crying and sad mess! I love when despite hardships they say what they want and ultimately help themselves or save themselves and others. I just loved that scene between herself, Segi and Dad in the hospital. Choi Kang Hee's character in Heart to Heart and Sooyoung's Lee Bom Yi in My Spring Days also come to mind when I think of strongly written heroines. This drama (although not totally with out flaws) has been my crack for the last couple of months and I think I am going through withdrawals. Every character was perfectly cast and the chemistry between the leads was breathtaking. I loved Ri Jin's family and their dynamics. I believed the sibling relationship and love between Ri Jin and Ri On! They were the reason she was able to recover so healthily from the abuse. The show did an excellent job of highlighting the importance of support systems and utilizing those supports in difficult times.
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lara4liwa
March 17, 2015 at 5:20 PM
I second that Deemarie, always love the strong heriones, I do watch Spring Days and take a peek at Heart to Heart where the lady lead looks like she never take a bath for a year, but I love her there, they dont have to wear perfect outfits and make up, just do the real acting on portraying real human beings..LOL
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sancheezy
March 18, 2015 at 8:44 PM
yeah, I like the heroine in heart to heart and soyoong in that drama too (I kind of forget the drama plot)
but I like that they have sense and just behave like them, and they also cry in mess, which I find lovely,
for me, RJ is no.1 (part of it because of Ri-On)
they built rijin character and it just lovely
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61 MissCanuck
March 17, 2015 at 4:59 PM
One of the best dramas I have watched since watching Korean dramas. I loved every moment of it. Ji Sung won my heart with his portrayal of Do Hyun
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62 Cocoboo
March 17, 2015 at 5:43 PM
Kill Me, Heal Me is one of my ultimate favorite dramas now. Ji Sung and Hwang Jung Eum were so wonderful. Loved their acting. They nailed their roles and it's nice that both of their characters were upstanding, admirable people who weren't stuck up or mean.
I really thought of Cha Do Hyun's personalities as individual characters with their own desires and emotions. Their farewells made me shed plenty of tears.
How Cha Do Hyun's father woke up from his coma at just the right time and how well he recovered from it was a little too neat. But I didn't really care about his side of the story or his screen time.
In the end, seeing Cha Do Hyun living a happy life was truly precious. ^^
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63 Waiting
March 17, 2015 at 6:56 PM
This show was pure love!
Ji Sung, you have a fan for life as does most of the cast.
Perry, Se Gi and Yo-na were my favorites. Perry's goodbye was the worst follow by Yo-na's.
Ji Sung really settled in to these characters and in the end you could really see them as separate people and he brought each forward not. If you think about it, he really did not have drastic changes like wigs and others things, he still looked like Ji Sung, but over time that fell away and all you saw was each character. That is talent and I was glad to witness it.
Will miss this show but was satisfied by the ending.
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64 Coolrepublica I ❤️ Ji Sung
March 17, 2015 at 7:52 PM
The drama is over and I have discovered an amazing actor. An acting god. Ji Sung. I want him back in a drama this year.
I was hoping he could re-team with Ha Ji Won in her drama and have a reunion. But I will leave it to the drama gods and lee Bo young.??
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lara4liwa
March 18, 2015 at 11:23 PM
Ji Sung + Ha Ji Won....woooow...I wouldnt miss it for the world!!
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65 niquole
March 17, 2015 at 8:40 PM
Besides the well written script, the success of this drama is highly because of Ji-Sung who gave us a superb performance in portraying the 7 personalities. I doubt there are many actors who can pull that off (hence, the rejection from who and who?, just saying). Ji-Sung definitely nailed it and once again proved that he's one South Korea's best actor. This has gone to my must re-watch list. The best k-drama so far in 2015, I must say.
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66 Mrs Denny Lee
March 17, 2015 at 9:26 PM
I loved this show so much. It was very special from not knowing what to expect and then getting so hooked on this and then the reveal stunned me. i'm not good at figuring stuff out anyways but no one had this theory on any blog I saw and so we did not see it coming. And then besides the dad it was hard to just punch these terrible people in the face cuz they were bad by their horrible choices but not the villainous masterminds I totally was expecting.
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67 kathy
March 17, 2015 at 11:12 PM
I loved this drama from beginning to end.
Thank you so much for recapping.
I'm gonna miss this so much.
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68 thursdaynexxt
March 18, 2015 at 6:05 AM
A bit late to the farewell party, but wanted to say a big thank you to purplecow and Saya for their great recaps, and salute the cast and crew of KMHM - loved it to bits!
Ji Sung and Hwang Jung Eum have done it again - awesome OTP!
And Ri On - best Oppa ever!
Thought I'd share a cartoon of KMHM highlights - had me in tears:
https://thetalkingcupboard.wordpress.com/2015/03/17/kill-me-heal-me-goodbye-se-gi/#more-21007
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sancheezy
March 18, 2015 at 8:45 PM
okay, I read it before and cry,
now I am gonna do the same,
maybe with less tears, ^^
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Beebeeshing
March 18, 2015 at 9:34 PM
This is so so so good. I really love the comic!! Segi is the best 2nd lead. ?
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69 gf
March 18, 2015 at 7:34 PM
I just want to say thank you to Purplecow and Saya for the summary of KMHM and to everyone here who loved every bit of KMHM.
I am still sad that it is over and so I've just been rewatching and rewatching it. I don't know when it will pass but it still makes me happy so I will endure! :)
I wish the whole cast and crew success on whatever project they take. I will wait for the day when I can see Ji Sung, Hwang Jung Eum and Park So Joon in another project.
I cannot wait for Kwak Bo Bae to arrive! I hope I get to see a family pic sometime in June :)
God bless everyone and fighting!!!! :)
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lara4liwa
March 18, 2015 at 11:29 PM
I hope their collaboration again wont take too long gf, and sure I cant wait for Bo Bae picture too, I just hope that JS and LBY will release her pic to the public, because JS already stated that he wanted to keep the family matters privately
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gf
March 19, 2015 at 7:57 PM
hi lara4liwa!
I read that too and I just love him even more :) he really values his family and knows where his heart is.
ah im still stuck with KMHM hahaha my sister already suggesting other dramas but I still cannot move on.
ottoke!!!!
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70 redfox
March 18, 2015 at 11:30 PM
I have decided I can let go now. because suddenly, I felt it is ungrateful to keep being sad. Ji Sung and everyone else, gave us those magnificent characters, they brought them to life, now these characters will be living in the invisible world having tea with Batman and Cinderella, and we need to set the actors free. They did their job and these are strong characters, who can survive even without them. bye-bye! no, see you around!
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71 fleurofjasmine
March 19, 2015 at 12:45 AM
Translation of Jisung full interview:
https://thetalkingcupboard.wordpress.com/2015/03/19/kill-me-heal-me-interview-ji-sung/#comments
Enjoy!! :)
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redfox
March 19, 2015 at 4:20 AM
dying at those pictures! thank you for this link!
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Beebeeshing
March 19, 2015 at 4:22 AM
Thank you! You are an angel. I love the interview. Jisung is so down to earth.
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fleurofjasmine
March 19, 2015 at 6:20 AM
You're welcome @redfox @beebeeshing :)
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72 goldeng
March 19, 2015 at 5:01 PM
awwww I'm missing this drama like crazy!! felt sooo weird to not run to watch the raws for the new ep. yesterday and today~~ *sigh* I too had some questions like what happened to Chae Yeon, uncle, evil mother and Kijoon that would never get answered because even tho I disliked some of the characters, I wanted to know what happened to them..
Rant aside, I really liked how they reinforced the thought that his disorder is "controlled" and not "cured" by love like it happens in every other drama that say love can cure any phobia... if he decides to hide and not deal with things, he might divide himself again...
Ill miss all the personalities! Im pressed Yo Sub didnt got more screentime, since unlike Segi that teared my heart apart with his words filled with anger but expressed how hurt he was, Yo Sub just with his eyes got me crying like a baby without even saying a word... Truth is Ji Sung deserves an award... like RIGHT NAO!
I might make one and give it to him myself!
Thank you all for the recaps! :333
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redfox
March 19, 2015 at 11:27 PM
you can find a Yo Sub everywhere. look around and give them a hug.
I have actually done a small "healing workshop" in a mental hospitals´ childrens de. and saw kids who had lost their home, tried to cut themselves etc. it was a bit difficult but I tried to make them have fun and let out their frustration through making felt. there was this thing where you throw the felted piece hard against the floor to make it "orange skin". I think that did some good for them... but one kid did not want to participate. he was the Yo Sub of the group. he thought everything was pointless. so I talked to him a little, asking if he likes being there. he said no, he wants to go home. I asked whats at home. he said a dog and a canary. his friends. turned out he was bullied at school. he had threatened to release the dog on the bullies, their crappy parents complained and he was stamped the bad kid. I said, next time, invite those bullies to come and pet the dog, there is no kid that can resist. and I said, let´s make a toy that you can use to play with the dog together! then we felted a striped ball together and cut it open. he was pleased even if he did not show it.
thats the problem with Yo Sub types: if you dont ask for yourself, they will sit in a corner and never talk to anyone, and at one point they snap. and despite being smart kids, they have no ability to flip the situation around and see it from another angle. instead they use their creativity to make up crazy disaster scenarios how everything will end bad no matter what they do. you have to actually demonstrate them how it could also end differently.
and that´s why Yo Na was the opposite of Yo Sub: she did not care of the outcome of her actions, she just went for it! it is not a positive mindset it´s that she wasn´t phased by failure. just press on, doesn´t matter how people see it. she was the type you can´t even bully, just make sure she doesn´t run into a pole.
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73 weirdnshort
March 20, 2015 at 2:22 PM
I didn't think I could get attached to all the personalities but it was so sad to see them go. I was tearing up. I enjoyed this drama. Very fitting conclusion
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74 Mustlovekdrama
March 21, 2015 at 3:46 AM
This was such a well written recap. You are a gifted writer Saya.
I loved this episode so much. I'm so glad there were no wedding cliches in the end. The writer did a great job.
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75 nuwoy
March 21, 2015 at 7:12 PM
just finished watching KLHM...arghhhh...gonna miss all the character..yoo na,perry park,se gi,yo sub,ri on and obviously do hyun and ri jin..kudos to the all staff,actors and actress involved!
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76 yangpz
April 2, 2015 at 10:41 PM
I absolutely LOVE this drama! I loved all the characters and Ji Sung did such a great job at protraying each character that it made me believe they were individual people! Yo Na's last appearance was sad and hilarious, even though I always dreaded her appearances LOL I love Ji Sung and Jung Eum as a couple! I hope they have more projects together!
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77 kiwineo
April 5, 2015 at 2:59 AM
It is a nice drama! :) the storyline is good and they know their focus, which is on cha do hyun instead of the other personalities. The other personalities helped to tell the stories. And oh ri jin was able to love all the personalities and took good care of them. Unlike the one in hyde jekyll me. Hyde Jekyll Me has nth convincing other than Hyun Bin's acting. Kill me heal me is just fantastic. the story flow is not bad as well. Ji Sung's acting is good esp his eye acting! omg. I feel that there's more life to the characters in this drama and the story is touching and sad. Good to see the innocence in the 2 children during their childhood. How they supported each other and offered comfort to each other are heartwarming :) Overall, I'm satisfied with the storyline and its humor brought about by the other personalities.
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78 antonia
May 25, 2015 at 8:54 PM
it's been ages since i last wrote here... or in any site... but KMHM, made me not only a pool of tears but also wish that i've joined its amazing journey while it was airing... the fun, the collective sobs, the crazy and the wonderful...i missed so much, but hey better late than never. i just finished it and i can´t help crying, i'm missing it so much already
purplecow, saya... love your recaps and insights... komawo! your the best
as for the characters in the drama.. i love them all. HJE at first you were a little (lot) noisy for my taste (so much yelling sister!) i thought i would'nt love you... but girl i did! that is how it's supposed to be.. i liked you so much in CYHMH and FHT2..
ORO, Appa, Omma... the best family ever, how can i love you more...
JISUNG (capital letters because you are so great... hands down best actor!!!) you made me a converted fan (must run to watch all your dramas and download tons of pics of yours! (to think there was a time when i thought you were ugly (you beatiful, gorgeous you, sexy you (shame on me)) i can't say how wonderful you were in every personality (i can't let them go... i want them with us forever and ever) specially yoona (love you girl) and se gi (hottest man ever... so cute and so heartbroken... you broke my heart) but i must say even if they were my faves.. my most beloved is CDH... he's the man i want for myself, he's perfect... his sad, coy smile... i always missed you, i always wanted you on my screen.. you were my ray of sunlight... i just lo lo love you you you...
i think i wasn't that crazy for a drama since a long time ago... you're on my top drama list... i must say that the writer was amazing too, all the crew...
and i must say i need to rewatch this very soon... i don't kow how to watch other dramas...
last words: Jisung i need you in a new drama soon
girls love your comments... thanks for sharing
LOVE LOVE LOVE
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79 Dreamer
May 27, 2015 at 3:28 AM
the scene , when cha do hyun was talking with shin... at that time .. that song in playback... just made me cry.... ji sung was just awesome.... chebaw... :)
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80 vanilla_latte
June 15, 2015 at 8:46 PM
Just finished the series and I loved it so much! I didn't think I would enjoy a show that would make me cry so much, but it felt so good! Sometimes I'm laughing then crying then laughing again. I liked YoNa best of all the personalities. She is a riot! This series is wonderful...will re-watch again and again. All the characters have a special place in my heart.
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81 dramadreamer
June 26, 2015 at 12:30 AM
oh manz, this is so far the best series of 2015 i've watched. I hate to say it - but it stole my heart more than Healer and Sensory Couple - sorry, JCW and Yu Choon - Ji Sung is just unbeatable in KMHM. Hwang Jeung-Eum is an excellent actress. Loved watching JS and HJE in Secret and they have proved to be perfectly cast again here. The plus points of KMHM : The pacing, casting, the interaction between the personalities (no walls between the change in characters - the seamless transitions between Ppark, SSeGi, Yona, Yo Sub etc were executed flawlessly by Ji Sung. As Ri On himself said - why was he even calling Cha Do Hyun "her" when he was Yo Na? I totally bought into Yo Na each time she appeared (Ep 13 - the side-splitting chase running down HongDae - my all time fav scene) and Ep 18 when she bids farewell to Ri Jin. I still think it crimimal that JS did not get the best actor award at Bakseang - criminal, criminal, criminal ?>#$_+@#$% - even worse than the wench who shows her teeth !!LOL; focus of the drama was clear from the beginning - the healing process for CDH was given centrestage and thankfully, there were no side plots or love triangles . Honestly, the main theme - healing and forgiveness - was strong enough to carry the entire drama for the 20 Eps. Down sides : the repeated flashbacks were indeed tiresome midway through as they did not add to our understanding of the past until the fire scene ; the complex personality of Ri On was not fully fleshed out - so he wanted to be an Oppa to Ri Jin in all senses of the word? He should totally go see Prof Pil for a detailed diagnosis of his obsession in Ri Jin. However, as with all Kdramas, viewers are often left to infer the reasons for the character's actions rather than having it all spelt out to us. The transition of CDH's father from a gentle man to an abuser was also left unexplained but hinted at - the stress of living in the gilded cage and having to see his ex-wife's bastard child under the same roof, perhaps? In any case, i love how CDH's underlying pain and struggle was never trivialised but repeatedly surfaced to remind the viewers of the horror and pain of such a condition. "hallucination" by Jang Jae was excellent as the OST for the first Episode. thank you, show - for treating us as a discerning and intelligent audience, for sharing all the ups and downs of these amazing loving characters/personalities and being the first drama which made us feel as breathless from being flipped over by a judo manoevre by a certain feisty intern :P
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82 CaRdYnIkKy
August 20, 2015 at 2:31 PM
love you oh ri jin and oh ri on
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83 OMG it's Healer ?
August 30, 2015 at 3:13 PM
I must admit, this drama is amazing! ❤
I will miss YoNa and SeGi a lot :(
Ji Sung better win multiple awards here!!!! I'm rooting him all the way :D
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84 CindyT.
August 30, 2015 at 3:21 PM
I've watched many Korean dramas and this one has stolen my heart. My other favorites have been My Love From Another Star and My Name is Kim Sam Soon. The acting in this drama was so good I can't say enough about it.
I will always recommend this to anyone who asks. Thank you for the detailed recaps you do. I have to read them ahead when the emotions from watching the drama get to be too much for me.
I don't want to say goodbye to these characters-especially Se Gi. His intense emotions and strength/protectiveness are what I love about him the most.. well that and his super-sexy intense looks.
I wish I could thank Jin Soo-Won for such a beautiful, intense wonderful story in person.
Ji Sung's acting was so good I truly believed each personality could stand alone in their own drama but to know they come together as one and are part of Cha Do Hyun makes it a little easier to let them go and say not goodbye but I'll look for you in his (CDH) expressions or words.
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85 GrnDrgns&Appls
September 10, 2015 at 10:21 PM
I'm glad someone else noticed Secretary Ahn's weird hair-do at the end. Was that a mini man-bun??
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86 ObsessedMuch
September 28, 2015 at 12:54 AM
Oh man, I just finished this show! In 2 days mind you! I know no one is going to see this comment now, but I just wanted to contribute to the fan base of this show. Ji Sung should win all the awards for this brilliant performance.
This show was awesome in every aspect. I couldn't find faults with anything, and even if I did, Ji Sung's performance alone would have atoned for any mistake!
I loved the brother(Ri On) too, so now going to watch She was Pretty, so that his love for Ri Jin is fulfilled in some way :P
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87 dramabird
October 16, 2015 at 3:38 PM
I'm going voting crazy!
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88 No1
October 18, 2015 at 3:09 AM
Loved him since Protect the boss. but his acting made me addicted to him in this drama
best performance ever
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89 Bongsookie?
October 21, 2015 at 4:18 AM
5 stars for you Ji Sung-sshi! I loved this drama because of your acting - the ending credit was cute. Never seen a drama that their leads have said goodbye to their audiences :)
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90 Anonymous
March 4, 2016 at 3:31 PM
I am sure no one will see this comment, which is partly why I am writing it. I watched Kill Me, Heal Me only recently (2016) and the show both killed me and healed me. This episode in particular. As a child I was abused, neglected and beaten, then adopted into a loving family where I was able to grow up loved. But I always believed there was something wrong with me and always felt I didn't deserve to be loved.
When Ri Jin got to talk to her younger self, I sobbed so hard because I wish with all my heart I could talk to my own younger self to say the same things. That scene...it killed me and triggered a bout of really black depression. One of the worst I've had in years. This show, this episode brought up so much of the past I had thought I dealt with. I sobbed for days over it.
But the show healed me as well because it gives me hope for my own happy ending. And to hear the words I would say to my child-self, said out loud by Ri Jin, was soothing. I listened to her as if I were my younger self and felt comforted.
As hard as it was to watch, I love this drama. It killed me. It healed me.
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Jadielaw
February 2, 2017 at 3:54 AM
Wonderful comment. Wishing you all the best.
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91 Diadem
September 14, 2016 at 12:53 PM
Diadem.kill me heal me is a very interesting Korean drama that I immediately fell in love with especially segi character. I give the producer a kudos for doing a wonderful job including the actors and actresses for making it a huge success.I was kinda hoping oh ri jin and cha du yung would marry in the end of the drama and have three or four kids(laughing.)I must say again it was a very hilarious and entertaining drama.Ah yo na won't u leave oh ri on alone,nice one that u came back 4him in the end as a beautiful lady to give him more kisses and hugs.finally am gonna give a big shout out to all my oppas and unnis in south Korea I luv u guys and keep up the good work,God bless u :-) :-).
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92 DonkeyPoops
July 28, 2017 at 9:36 AM
I thought that the appearance of Mr. X was a nice touch! It showed how much he loved and wanted to protect Ri Jin - he wouldn't even let his mental image of her leave alone and afraid.
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