Beans of Wisdom: Death and abandoned cakes

by DB Staff

This week in Beans of Wisdom…

Ally writes in a thread on physical beauty in “The Lonely Shining Goblin: Episode 13” comment #77.1.1:

I have a young daughter and try my very best to put out examples of people who are confident in how they look and act, which brings about their beauty. Everyone has their awkward stages, but it doesn’t mean you have to get plastic surgery to “correct” things. My Asian “flat nose” and freckles makes me, me. I could write a dissertation about the Korean preoccupation of beauty and vanity, but this is not the forum. For any of you who are critical of actors or actresses for their looks, look at yourself and find the beauty within! We are all in need of this.

rufuru answers a question of why women have trouble speaking up about sexual harassment in public places. In comment #3.2 of “Strong Woman Do Bong-soon is a tiny hulk in first teaser,” she writes:

A lot of things can factor in when it comes to someone being “submissive” in situations like this. As someone who has being harassed before, it is incredibly difficult to stand up to people like that, especially in public settings. There are things like fear, shock, and certainly shame (because, sadly, those that experience any sort of sexual harassment or abuse are often pushed to feel ashamed about something that is by no means their fault) that you have to acknowledge.
Besides, you can see the woman’s hand pushing his away, she’s clearly trying to fend him off, but quietly. Let’s be real here, we’re not superhumans, and no one is to blame but the creep doing the groping.
Why do you think people like him tend to opt for such crowded, public places? Less likely to be caught, and less likely to be called out.
It’s a sad truth, but I’m pretty sure most people would react similarly to the situation, even if we’d like to think that we’d do differently.
It’s easy enough to criticise a situation when your not the one in it.

harmonyfb shares:

I’ve always told my daughters that those guys count on you being too embarrassed to make a scene….so you should make sure that you embarrass THEM.

DelSatu sends some words of support to a letter-writer in comment #10.2 of “Spill the Beans: Catching the Lee Min-ho virus and learning to heal”:

Dear Miliver,
My sympathies for your husband. It must have been a really tough time for you, and I congratulate you for going on and finding strengh to carry on and find happiness again.
Yes, dramas are not like real life (and the world is a better place without as many trucks of doom and sudden amnesias) but sometimes drama have the words and warmth that we, clumsy human being, sometimes lack in difficult moments. Dramas are mostly made for entertainment purposes, but sometimes they happen to make us grow, and heal, and they support us when everything seems to fall in pieces – isn’t it a nice gift?

And in “The bloody battle for the people’s hearts begins in Rebel,” acciokdramas shares in #10:

Sometimes I feel a bit guilty being so invested in sageuks, because it felt like I was neglecting my own country’s history. I never really felt a pull towards my own country’s background, though I do know the basic stuff. It just so happens that Korean history, with the beautiful clothing, the cultures and the social hierarchy, and UK’s socio-political, 18th-century rules and norm attracts me more. I know there’s a lot of people like me out there too, so I just wanted to say that enjoying shows like these are completely fine and you don’t have to feel guilty! They’re classified as entertainment after all, and learning about another country’s vast culture and history is an opportunity, and one that’s exciting. Thus I await Rebel Hong Gil-dong (and his oh-so-glorious mane of tremendous glory) with lots of anticipation!! Cheering for Yoon Kyun-sang in his first leading role!

WishfulToki replies:

No need to feel guilty. It actually gives you a broader perspective to then consider your own country’s history. In fact, global history is one of the most exciting new developments (for me) in universities. I used to be interested in only European and American history, thinking that Asia was just too complex for me. Thanks to kdrama I’ve slowly started to learn about Korean and Chinese characters and dynasties. Actually, I’m going to a lecture on Ming pottery next week so in a way kdrama has broadened my academic horizons (I’ve just justified my drama procrastination syndrome too, yay!).

I love it when two dramas help me piece together bits of history. For example, I happened to watch Empress Ki and Faith one after the other. Neither were actually very ‘historical’, I realised after doing some research, but they made me look into China and the Korean peninsula more closely towards the end of the Yuan dynasty, 14th century.

And when my historical worlds collide, it’s just amazing. I still remember a scene in Queen Seon Deok where merchants from Rome (would have been the Byzantine Empire by then, 7th century) were speaking in Latin with their Asian counterparts in the middle of the desert. I was dumstruck. We forget that there were global connections before the Internet.

Katie asks in comment #3 of “Stepping on land mines and stripping on airplanes in Missing 9’s latest teaser”:

I’m watching for the answer to the mystery that is their matching beige/brown/white color scheme outfits.
Airplane dress code??

Kay:

Subway sponsored the outfits; each article of clothing contains a hidden pocket, in which contains a life saving subway sandwich, the wrapper also expands as a floatation device. Sandwiches can be used as monetary value, the one to gain the most sandwiches will be deemed Lord of Subway Island.
Subway will find it’s way here, I promise you, no one escapes Subway.

gureum:

They chose the beige color to represent their wide assortment of breads.

While Abthurd points out this interesting bit in #23 of “Missing 9: Episode 2”:

When Joon Oh was dreaming about the feast he eats everything until the pork barbecue. He mentioned he dislikes pork barbecue. Instantly reminds me of Piggy from Lord of The Flies. I’m not sure if anyone have read the book, but Lord of The Flies feels are strong with the drama more than ‘Lost’ is. After two episodes, I felt as if Yeol’s character maybe a slight parallel to Simon in Lord of The Flies.

In comment #21 of “Romantic Doctor Teacher Kim: Episode 20 (Final),” starswillshine writes:

I loved the flashback in this episode as it showed how Seo Jung remembered Teacher Kim as the one who always comforted her, while Teacher Kim remembered how hard she worked to get to where she was right now. We don’t see the goodness in ourselves but others saw them in us. Be good, as there are people who will appreciate.

NotMacgyver in “Solomon’s Perjury: Episode 8” comment #16:

One thing that has always stood out to me in life is that when people die, they suddenly become “saints”. I don’t mean that the dead should be vilified, but say the truth about the deceased. No one in that school knew who Lee So-woo really was; they didn’t know how he was feeling, they didn’t what he had been through, they didn’t know his personality. But once he died, he was known as the quiet boy who didn’t want trouble and was unfairly treated by the school. This is why they were so surprised when his brother said he was a mean and manipulative person. It turned out that So-woo actually started the fight by antagonising Woo-hyuk.

I love that the drama shows that duplicity in people. Like people mentioned in other comments/recap, the characters are not one-dimensional: the bully cries for his grandma and tries to protect his mother, Joo-ri is a liar and a bad friend but she’s also the victim of bullying and ostracism, Seo-yeon is “miss perfect” but she has doubts and is confused about the steps to take, etc. They’re all young teenagers who have been exposed to the harsher reality of life and I am excited to see them move forward and grow.

Cyan talks about the different outcomes of two possible villains in “Legend of the Blue Sea: Episode 18” comment #33:

Wow, great episode, but it was really the side characters Nam-doo and Chi-hyun that shone. I lost interest in the main couple a long time ago, but the Nam-doo and Chi-hyun parallels perfectly embodies what “the struggles of the human heart is the only thing worth writing about” is. Both characters are shades of gray that could have either gone to the dark or the light, and we were shown exactly how all those little things that happened shaped their choices. Let’s start with Nam-doo, we don’t know much about his past, but we do know that he is a con artist and so he is certainly capable of deceit and betrayal. He is also obviously mercenary and loves money as shown when he first found out Chung is a mermaid. But I think that deep down, he wants to trust and be trusted by someone, not just anyone though, but someone who would do the same for him. When he told Chung that he could betray her, it almost sounded like he was testing the waters to see what her reaction would be and expecting the worst. Then, instead of judging him based on his past, she told him that she will trust him unless he proves himself untrustworthy, I can see how that would give him the incentive to live up to her trust. Then Chi-hyun comes along and threatens him, treats him with contempt, and expects him to betray his friends because he is an untrustworthy con artist, it’s no wonder Nam-doo would double-cross him. As for Chi-hyun, he was constantly torn between loyalty to his mother and to his adopted father. He loves his mother, but doesn’t want to be like her. He wants to be a true son to his adopted father and did everything that Joon-jae did not do as a good son, but in the end, it was not enough as Dad only considers Joon-jae to be his true family, and there is nothing he can do since he can’t just go and change his DNA. It probably did not help matters when being on Dad’s side also means being on Joon-jae’s side, who never gave him a chance at being a true brother. Joon-jae had good reasons not to trust him, but it probably stung when he immediately accused him of intentionally trying to kill Chung as soon as he found out that he was the driver in the car accident. He established a sort of rapport with Chung, but in the last episode, we saw that he figured out that she asked him out to eat just to draw him away from the house, that probably reads as betrayal in his books. So in the end, when the push came to the shove, he chose his mother because she puts him above all others.

While Gem cheers for the often-ignored female second leads in “Legend of the Blue Sea: Episode 19” comment #41:

Lastly, Shi-Ah, I had not seen this coming that she maybe the jilted wife. It makes sense. It also feels oddly satisfying that she gets to have her own little fated love story in this life where it is not one sided. The vision of the teenage bride falling asleep with her bridal makeup on beside her husband who loved another person and later ran to his love leaving her behind felt heartbreaking to me in a way. We are so used to evil second leads and so little time was spent on her character in joseon that I didn’t think much of it. But this episode made me feel like Dam Ryung made some pretty bad choices in the past that had some long, heartbreaking results for some innocent people around him too and I am glad he made the right choice in the right time this time around. And yay for Tae Oh and Shi-Ah, that kiss was so cute and romantic, like Chung said she was fated to meet him through all this so I am satisfied.

mehungie starts the death talk in “The Lonely Shining Goblin: Episode 13” comment #2.4.6:

Another thing I loved about this death: after 900 years of trying to pull out his sword in vain, tonight he practically accomplished just that. He, not Eun-tak, ended his own curse, when he had the valid mission for that sword to come out.

I can’t help but compare his goodbyes this time to the time when he thought he would die by the first snowfall. The first time was more for comic relief than anything. The idea of finally being able to die came to him so suddenly, he was in no way ready for it. He was just then beginning to realize how precious his *life* had been, the life that he had found so tiresome for so long. His gestures back then (gifting people with what he thought they most wanted at the time: credit card to Deok-hwa, lease to Reaper, which, LOL, and purse to Eun-tak), while still sweet, still erred on the shallow side, showing that he didn’t fully grasp the severity of bidding goodbye forever.

More importantly, back then, he still had so much unfinished business. It was simply not the right time to go. Now we know what those unfinished business all were: reuniting with his sister, getting rid of the bad guy, and finally reaching the king to give him that message of love.

This time, Kim Shin’s goodbyes were so much more solemn, more quiet, more poignant, more meaningful, weren’t they? Looking at Deok-hwa from afar, knowing that’s he getting the proper mentoring, saying he’ll miss him. Being assured that his sister is living well and healthy and protected. Spending sweet time with his bride. Giving the king his notice of death. There is nothing materialistic about death and goodbyes. Only feelings and love. This time he did it right. This time it was serious. This time it was for real. This time he vanished.

O_o shares a story that illustrates the value of life in #38.3.3.2:

Why taking a life is considered really bad in Buddhist Goryeo can be better explained by this anecdote from Buddha’s life: one day, a small bird was being chased by a vulture, or a (Buddhist) devil. The bird flew to Buddha and begged for its life. Of course, Buddha agreed to shield the bird. But the devil said he would give up on the bird only if Buddha gave his own flesh that weighed the same as the bird. So Buddha carved out of his right thigh a chunk of flesh which he thought was about the same weight as the bird. But when the devil weighed them, the scale tipped toward the bird. So Buddha carved out another chunk of flesh from his left thigh. Again, the bird was heavier. At that moment, Buddha had a realization and offered his whole body. When Buddha’s whole body was weighed against the bird, the scale was level. All creatures have only one life and the weight of each life is the same.

So in Buddhism, taking a life, whether of an elephant or of a bug, whether of your own or some other’s, especially without any good purpose, is the worst negative karma you can accrue. And of course as long as you have karma, you will keep getting reincarnated to pay off the debt.

And dv in #46:

I think it was appropriate punishment, to teach Kim Shin to value life after killing people. Loving and wanting to live taught him to value life. Watching all his loved ones die grandfather and grandsons too must have taught him the value of human life to others, given how he had taken loved ones from others. Now, he got his loved ones taken. If human is life imprisonment for murder, counting all the lives he’d taken, 900… is it just? Hmmm…

In comment #143.2, Kiara talks about the plight of female characters in dramaland:

I do have a problem with erasing the girls’ memories (Sunny and maybe Eun-tak too). It should be their decision whether they want to forget or not. It’s the darkest and hardest time that makes them stronger.
I don’t particularly like the fact that goblin and reaper gets to decide what’s good for Sunny and Eun-tak without their knowledge. If Eun-tak wants her memory erased then that’s fine but to do it because that’s what Shin wants then I do not approve of it.

Marina:

Personally, what irks me the most, is the shallowness of lead female’s dialogues and characters compared to their male counterparts. In every drama. While Goblin and GR try to discuss morality, life and other topics, the female leads conversations are devout or any meaning. Just sitting there passively (Sunny) eating crunchy things and mopping after handsome rich guys, waiting for a king? And the writer is a woman? What a disservice for all ladies out there. I just rewatched Goblin (snowy holiday weekend with no kids – they are back to college – is the best time for it) and found Sunny’s character nothing less than appalling. How do you take a bright, strong teenager (Goblin’s Coreyo sister) and turn her into this shallow, preoccupied with looks caricature of a women is beyond me. Her and GR’s interactions add to comedic side of this drama, for sure, nothing else.

“The Lonely Shining Goblin: Episode 14” comes back with a cure for the harrowing end from last week. Growingbeautifully writes in #33:

I like so much that it is full hearted commitment that has brought Shin and Eun Tak back together.

Even in death, he remained true to the contract, sacrificing his own peace, by rejecting ‘heaven’ and opting instead to remember and suffer loneliness to give himself as rain and snow.

It is also the committed loving of the heart that continued Eun Tak’s heartbreak to the point that she pleaded to be saved as she made her birthday wish. These and his sacrificing himself in limbo were what made it possible for him to be brought back into her life.

This show is just so beautifully romantic, the way it plays out with intentional pacing, the longing that continues and the patient waiting for the right time. I’m so happy that the right time has come!!!

lunaticandra asks in comment #7:

And we’re forced to believe that even 9 years after goblin’s demise, Samsung would only produced Galaxy 7 Edge.
Or maybe that’s the point all along?
They’re trying to tell us that the phone is so everlasting and even has the anti-dingy formula that it would last for a good 9 years. As we see how euntak’ and basically everyone’s phone always look as good as new.

gureum:

Kim Shin: “You may not be immortal, but this phone is.”

BedeliaJane has another question in #44:

Why get a birthday cake when she didn’t eat it? Haha! She didn’t even bring it back in with her.

Klurker:

Come to think of it, she hasn’t eaten a single cake for the past freaking 9 years! Lol. She has been leaving her cake wherever. And in the only time she was given a cake by her “family”, Kim Shin took all of it out of pettiness. LOL

Van:

You MUST be new! Jk, but c’mon now, K drama characters rarely eat/drink the food they buy/order! You have no idea how many times I’ve noticed characters just leaving after ordering their drinks/foods. Sunny did it at least once when she left Grims. And I didn’t notice it the first time, but I’m pretty sure Eun-tak’s cake that brought Shin back to life was a ppl product.

BedeliaJane:

Haha yes, in general for most dramas, usually the cast drink more than they eat (unless it’s the Let’s Eat series!) And when they do eat, it’s stuff like cup noodles and jajangmyeon that they will finish up

vkook:

Oh well, because Gong Yoo is more important than the cake? lol.

Thanks for making us laugh even as dramas make us cry. See you next week!

RELATED POSTS

• Beans of Wisdom: Corpse shipping and cameo crossovers
• Beans of Wisdom: When your hairstyle is killer…
• Beans of Wisdom: Love for all ages
• Beans of Wisdom: Choose your ending
• Beans of Wisdom: When dramas reflect life
• Beans of Wisdom: Sad pearls and charming tricksters
• Beans of wisdom: Travel plans and sad trucks