Spill the Beans: Dad blaming and troll shaming

by HeadsNo2

Alternately, this could be named “Spill the Beans: Beanie Appreciation Edition.” You guys are an awesome lot!
 
To submit your story, email us your stories, and we’ll keep sharing them as long as you guys keep sending them in.

 
You know when we all get mad at MBC for trying to bring Dae Jang Geum back? Reading all these stories, I start to understand why they’re so fixated on it. DuchessRhea shares hers:

So my story dates back a long time ago, and it begins quite differently from most international K-drama fans, apparently. I saw my first K-drama when I was around twelve (which would make it about twelve years of K-drama watching for me this year), when my dad brought home a boxed DVD set of Dae Jang Geum (also known as Jewel in the Palace, though I never knew the English title up until a few years ago) home from the library.

That’s right, a sageuk was my very first drama. I wouldn’t get into modern dramas for YEARS. Watching Dae Jang Geum became a family thing, when both my parents and I (I’m an only child) would all cuddle on the bed and binge watch episodes. When we reached the end of a DVD, we’d all whine and be back at the library looking for the next set.

We spent the next few years watching only historical dramas, from Jumong to Queen Seondeok, until I finally figured out how to stream online. Then a whole new world opened up to me. I started exploring more modern dramas (though I can’t for the life of me remember what that first one was), and got sucked even deeper into the black hole. At this point, my mom refused to join us, because she hated feeling that desperate need for the next episode, the need for MORE — her solution was to just stop watching them. (These days, she’ll watch the first and the last episode; she claims that she can guess what happened in the middle. We let her believe that.)

K-dramas also led me to my love of K-pop. I still remember the first hint I got that the world of K-pop even EXISTED. I was watching Shut Up! Flower Boy Band, and became curious about one of the actors. I then proceeded to look him up, and found out he was part of a K-pop boy band called Infinite. To this day, I still mourn the fact that Shut Up! is one of the few dramas (if not the only drama) that Infinite’s L excelled in.

K-dramas really did shape who I am today; I developed a fascination for Korean history, culture, food, etc., and it became the basis for my life. I received a scholarship to study in Korea for a year, and when I came back, I resumed my studying with a new major in mind: Asian Studies with a concentration in Korean. That’s where I am in my life now, working towards my BA with the hopes that it will bring me back to Korea, because once I got a taste of living there, I had to go back — permanently, if possible.

To this day, whenever my dad complains that I’m obsessed with K-dramas, K-pop, or Korea in general, I remind him that, technically, it’s his fault for bringing home that DVD set of Dae Jang Geum all those years ago. And can he really say anything? He probably watches more K-dramas than me. Heck, he watches them at double speed (sometimes even triple speed. — I don’t know how he does it…) so he can watch more in a shorter timespan.

What can I say? This household is whipped.

 
What do you mean, I can’t resist anyone who mentions me by name? BlueDoe’s story is just that good (don’t tell her about the sequel):

I got into K-dramas around 2008 because I was in love with the American show Full House, and every time I would search for clips, the Korean Full House would be in the results. I resisted for a while, but I finally clicked on it, and I loved it so much because it was so different from the movies/dramas we are used to watching.

Then I was hooked, I watched all of Song Hye-gyo’s dramas along with Secret Garden, My Name is Kim Sam-soon, etc… I actually understand Korean now without subtitles and can think of sentences in Korean in daily life, even though I still can’t create my own sentences yet. I tried so hard to make people around me watch, but nobody gets as crazy as me, and they stop watching after one drama. And then I usually have nobody to discuss the excitement and crazy reactions to awesome moments in shows. Then I found this site, and it is the best thing ever. I usually never write or read comments because I have two jobs and a family and a bunch of dramas to watch so I skip all discussions. However, this section encouraged me to write because I wanted to tell how much I appreciate the “Ratings” page and individual recaps.

I usually watch an episode after you’ve recapped it and open the recap in a separate tab, and then anytime something funny/cool/scary happens, I rush to that section in the recap and read the reaction such as “OH SHIIIIT RUUUUN” (girlfriday’s W—Two Worlds recaps). It makes me feel like I’m actually watching with someone. I do believe you guys analyze some stuff that wasn’t even intentional, but it’s still fun because I love overthinking plots enough to where I feel that I’m spending my time on meaningful stuff (which usually it isn’t). I feel like javabeans, girlfriday, LollyPip and HeadsNo2 are like my watching buddies, and I really enjoy the “What We’re Watching” section because it helps to know what others think about the week as well. Thank you so much for this awesome site!

 
Down with trolls, indeed! Divyrus shares a very, very heartfelt tale:

I have been putting this off for some time and am not sure where to start.

I have been seeing K-dramas for about seven years now. Around three years ago, I was really in a bad place. Me and this guy have been best friends for more than ten years through school and college, but somehow over time, lines started blurring and we got way too complicated. We were in denial for so long and maybe it made it worse, but long story short, it became very ugly. I know if its a K-drama, I would want them to cut through the hesitation and just dive in, but there is a good reason not to. When you get involved with your best friend, you both know each other’s worst weakness and with
lack of maturity, you can end up hurting the other in the worst way possible. Which is what happened. And since we both belonged to this same group of friends for years, it all broke. I lashed out pretty badly for lot of unintentional things and I lost belief in friendship. Combining it with some pretty unpleasant experiences (which included a harassment and a minor accident), I could say I hit an all time low.

Bruised mentally and physically, I built this huge wall around me, camped there, and decided not to have anything to do with the world anymore. I was mean to my friends who tried to reach me and became a workaholic as a distraction. And I had to put my usual happy face on to my parents so that they wouldn’t worry, which consumed all the energy I had. I basically avoided people when it wasn’t work-related, and being a bit of extrovert naturally, it only made things worse. And even when I tried getting out, my bad experiences made me scared, and I got panic attacks. I refused to reach out for help for fear of getting hurt again.

I was not seeing a lot of K-dramas by this time, and I opened Dramabeans daily more out of habit than anything else. And there I saw javabeans squeeing over a show called Healer. I decided to give it a try. I was awake till five in the morning marathoning the first six episodes. It has been a long time since I did that. It hit me with a new energy, and I was catching up on all recaps and comments at work. I have mostly been a lurker and always find beanies to tell me what I am thinking better and faster.

But there was something about this show – it exploded so big and suddenly that the sense of community in the recaps was so refreshing. I identified myself with Chae Young-shin when she stands up to violence despite her panic attacks. I found myself getting in involved in the conversations, and before I knew it, I was camping there permanently, squeeing over Ji Chang-wook’s jawline or writing essays on the characters and story arcs. It’s not a exaggeration when I say that that was the most words I have spoken outside of what was required in those six months. It slowly bought me out of my shell, and I realized how much I missed talking to people. It’s very true that it’s easier to talk to strangers than friends at times.
I was suddenly feeling alive as I squee’d and enjoyed the show along with the community that was so warm and all kinds of awesome.

I decided to stop the pity party and slowly brought the wall down. I reconciled with friends, reached for help, risked putting myself there, worked less, went out more and basically started living again. It was not easy, and I have avoided revisiting or thinking about that dark period, but looking back two years later, I feel I can look back on that girl and not recognize her. Getting excited about The K2 made me wanna rewatch Healer, and it took me back to who I was. And now I realize how far I have come.

I went on to see more dramas, made more new friends, met some amazing beanies in person and even found courage to move to a different country for work.

So, I would like to say a “Thank You” to all the beanies here, your comments that make me smile, laugh, and think, and special thanks to Healer beanies for all the warmth and love. Mostly my biggest thanks to javabeans and girlfriday for creating such a beautiful place here. It’s a sanctuary in this day and age of an internet that is full of snark, and I will be forever a fan cheering you both on!

P.S. I don’t pop into the contact page to send mail often, but did someone really call you a poopyhead for not doing recaps? Down with the trolls!

 
I can think of much more offensive things to find on someone else’s laptop. Dynasty101 tells of her accidental stumble into the K-drama universe:

It all started in the year 2014. I was in the office one day and felt bored since I was less busy. I decided to go and look for anyone who could give me movies to watch so I could keep myself busy, so I went to the IT office and asked my colleague for a movie. He said he didn’t have one, but the person’s laptop he was working on had one, so I should check it out…

I browsed through the laptop and found City Hunter — from the name, I thought it was American, but when I played the video, I realized it was Korean. I decided to watch it, and I fell so in love with the drama that I took it home for my family to watch. I told my friends and other colleagues about the drama, and those of them who watched it were all like, “Do you have any other drama with that same guy in it?” I was like, “Who, Lee Min-ho?”

I smiled because I knew we had all been infected with the Lee Min-ho bug. Of course, I had to go back to that same colleague to ask for another drama and came across Jumong. Damn, that drama was just so addicting — not just to me, but my family and colleagues. In the office, all we talked about was Jumong… it was awesome.

The main addiction started when I got home from work one day and saw my neighbor watching You’re Beautiful from their window since they kept it open. I went and asked for it when they were done, and automatically, they turned into my K-drama supplier. That was how I came across almost all Lee Min-ho’s drama from Boys Over Flowers, Personal Taste, Faith, Heirs, and also a lot of other nice dramas (You From Another Star, The King’s Face, King’s Daughter Soo Baek-hyang, Records of a Night Watchman, and the list goes on and on).

I located Dramabeans while watching Gu Family Book, since my neighbor didn’t have the last two episodes and we couldn’t find it in shops to buy then because it was still airing. After some time I resorted to checking online for the last two episode so I could watch it, but then I saw Dramabeans and decided to check it out. To my surprise when I read those two episodes it didn’t feel like I was just reading it, it felt like I was watching it happening live — I could relate with the characters and even cry while reading. For someone who’s not really emotional, wow. I thought it could be because I was watching it, but I started reading almost every drama that was recapped and I felt the same way, and today Dramabeans is like a second home to me… when I’m down, sad, or happy, I just come here. And before I know it I’m smiling like a goof and laughing like a loon while people stare at me like, “Is she all right?”

Today I’ve actually become an ambassador for Korean dramas in my community by supplying and recommending K-dramas to people. My cousins always come back with loads of K-dramas whenever they are on break from school. It is a beautiful, mutual feeling shared within and outside my family.

Thank you to the Dramabeans Community for being here for us when we needed you the most, you guys are the best!!!

 
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