Discovery of Romance: Episode 13

138 October 1, 2014January 24, 2016

by LollyPip

This episode is all about which is more important, your actions or what’s in your heart. Tae-ha and Yeo-reum both struggle with this, as they deny their feelings and assure everyone that things are fine and there’s nothing to worry about, just because they haven’t acted on their emotions. Can your heart betray someone, even if your actions have been faithful?

EPISODE 13: “Should I act drunk and just kiss you?”

After making their engagement formal, Ha-jin retells Yeo-reum the story of the two children in the orphanage, and he tells her that the story is about him and Ah-rim. He was the one who was adopted, and Ah-rim got left behind. She assures him that he’s not a bad person, because at twelve years old he had no choice.

Ha-jin tells Yeo-reum that for a boy to be adopted at that age is nearly a miracle, and he knew that much. So he said his goodbyes to a sleeping Ah-rim and left before morning, and never went back until his trip there recently. He says that his mother has always treated him like he was hers from birth (awww, Mom) so he honored her wishes not to tell anyone until now. He tells Yeo-reum that his birth name is Ahn Jin-soo, and she smiles and says it’s nice to meet him. Sweet.

Out for a jog, Tae-ha takes a call from Director Yoon on his PPL wrist phone, and gripes that Yoon keeps coming to his place every morning. Yoon just tells him to hurry back because breakfast is ready, and notes that Tae-ha was drinking alone again last night.

Yeo-reum asks Ha-jin if Ah-rim took him up on his offer to send her to study abroad, and he says he’s still trying to convince her. Yeo-reum tells him how she saw Ah-rim outside his place crying last night, which is why she misunderstood the situation. She sheepishly admits that she was purposely mean to Ah-rim, and promises to work on her temper.

Tae-ha slumps home to find Yoon in an apron, cleaning and complaining that this is definitely the home of a dumped man. Hee. They sit down to breakfast and Tae-ha wonders to himself if Yeo-reum got engaged last night. Yoon comments that it’s taking him longer to get over all this than he thought, but says it will get better — but Tae-ha isn’t so sure.

He thinks about Yeo-reum’s tearful confession that having him watch her is making her look for him, and admits that he hopes she keeps feeling that way. He wonders if he should leave her alone or hang tight to her. Frustrated, he tells Yoon that he fights these thoughts all day, and he wants to know when he’ll stop feeling like this. Yoon assures him that it just takes time, but Tae-ha moans that time only makes it worse.

Yoon expounds on how time heals all wounds, even dating wounds, and Tae-ha looks up at him curiously, “Did you have a relationship behind my back? I’ve never given you time to date.” HA.

Joon-ho approaches Mom’s writing assistant Gi-eun and kisses up to her to get her to write a love speech for him. She asks what the girl is like, and Joon-ho describes her as clueless, difficult, dirty, and gluttonous. She has a filthy mouth and she’s violent, but at least she’s got good breasts, hee. Gi-eun asks why he wants a girl like that, and Joon-ho is all, “I shouldn’t? Someone should stop me!”

He requests something really romantic, like something a guy would say in a drama (he suggests, “Do you smell something burning right now?” HAHA) and she agrees but demands payment. Joon-ho offers to pay her in Botox, and she accepts.

The girls admire Yeo-reum’s new ring, and she says that she thinks she can be happy for a long time with with Ha-jin. They get to work but Sol can hardly get anything done for all the texts from her Number Twelves, and Yeo-reum asks which one she likes best. Sol says she’s comfortable with Yoon, and that Eun-gyu had a lot of influence on her, but something has been bothering her about Joon-ho.

We see that Joon-ho has been literally falling all over himself for her, tripping over his own feet in his eagerness to give her rides, and trying to replace her dying flowers from Eun-gyu with his own (then sitting on them when he gets caught). Sol tells Yeo-reum that he’s been acting really awkward, and she doesn’t understand why.

Sol complains that she really only wants two things from a man — to treat her like a woman, and to treat her like a human being and not JUST a woman. That’s pretty smart, actually. She’s still angry that Joon-ho gave her the automatic toilet because it shows that he doesn’t see her as a woman.

Yeo-reum figures out that Sol has reasons for liking Director Yoon and Eun-gyu, but that she likes Joon-ho without a single reason. She says that sometimes you just fall for someone without even knowing them, for no reason at all, as she remembers that she fell for Tae-ha when she had only just met him.

She waxes poetic about the heart knowing love before the mind, until Sol finally yells, “I don’t like Kang Tae-ha!” She gets angry that Yeo-reum makes their relationship sound perfect but neglects to mention all the times he made her cry. She wails that she knows how Yeo-reum and Tae-ha still feel, and that it’s hard for her to watch (I’m glad SOMEBODY finally said it out loud), and asks Yeo-reum if she’s falling for Tae-ha again.

Yeo-reum pales and wordlessly starts to leave, but then stops: “That’s right, I am.” She tells Sol that of course she’s being swayed, because it’s Kang Tae-ha. They met young and loved with no reservations, and he knows her better than even Sol and Joon-ho. She repeats herself bleakly, “I’m swaying. I am. I’m telling you I am.”

She says that she keeps feeling these things and doing things for him, and that she’s worried Ha-jin will find out about them. But she hasn’t done anything wrong like sleep with him or make plans to run away with him. She knows her place is with Ha-jin and she’s holding onto that, but she’s not made of iron, so of course she’s falling for Tae-ha. Sol gets up and hugs her comfortingly.

Later, Sol apologizes to Yeo-reum for being harsh, saying that she’s just worried for her. Yeo-reum says it’s always hard to understand someone else’s relationship, but asks Sol to just support her. She assures her that she likes Ha-jin and has no intention of breaking up with him.

Ha-jin texts Ah-rim to ask if she’s looked over the information he gave her on some foreign study programs, which she receives just as she’s sitting with them spread all around her. She doesn’t answer him and instead packs up all of the information, and she turns the photo of them as children face-down and cries.

Joon-ho practices the romantic speech that Gi-eun wrote for him, and oh man it’s just. So. Bad. He starts again in his own words, as if he’s asking what he hasn’t got compared to the other guys, and telling her to just date him. It’s blunt, but better. He gets on one knee and practices the typical Dramaland speech about how he’ll stay by her side and be good to her (we’ve all heard it a thousand times), which is when Sol comes in and scares ten years off his life.

Sol guesses that Joon-ho has a girl he likes, telling him she’s probably a weird person because he’s got no taste in women. He thinks to himself that she’s right, because it’s her. Hee. Sol advises him not to confess like that or he’ll lose the girl.

Director Yoon worries about Tae-ha and Yeo-reum going alone to scout out the model house for their next project, and Tae-ha assures Yoon that he’ll be fine, and he does his best to be all business. Yeo-rum recalls a memory of the two of them in the park, drawing ideas for their future home and discussing marriage, and she thinks that even without a proposal or a ring she’d always thought they’d get married.

They walk through the model house, and Tae-ha can’t help but watch Yeo-reum, letting his eyes linger on her sadly. At one point she catches him, and she looks back at him for a moment as their words about their future plans for a home and children echo up from the past.

Thinking that she doesn’t want him knowing that she’s recalling these memories, Yeo-reum noticeably avoids using the design style she had wanted to use to decorate their future home. Tae-ha instantly notices and calls her on it, suggesting they go with that design concept. He asks if he makes her uncomfortable, reminding her that he hasn’t once said that he likes her since their final breakup.

Yeo-reum says that he did come by the workshop a few times, and Tae-ha tells her that he did that to get over her and that he doesn’t do it anymore. She apologizes for childishly avoiding the memories, and they wrap things up.

Ha-jin calls Yeo-reum to have dinner but she honestly tells him that she’s about to eat with Tae-ha since their work is over. He tells her that he’s going to go see Ah-rim since she hasn’t let him know what she thought of the overseas studies programs, and they both hang up looking nervous but determined to trust each other.

Yeo-reum and Tae-ha go to an old familiar restaurant and sigh over how they were so silly when they dated, that they used to fight over food all the time. Tae-ha doesn’t order alcohol in case things get tense again, but Yeo-reum jokes that it will be fine as long as he doesn’t drunk-text her in the middle of the night again. A few drinks later they’re talking about the things they each learned to like from the other, much more comfortable discussing their past than they have been.

Ha-jin intercepts Ah-rim on her walk home and takes her to dinner, where Ah-rim asks Ha-jin to stop looking at her with pity in his eyes. She brings up something he said to her once, that it’s possible that even if her brother found her, he might not want to see her, and asks why he thinks that.

Not knowing that she knows who he is, Ha-jin says that possibly, her brother wouldn’t want to lose what he has now, like his relationship with his adopted parents, or maybe it’s that looking back at the past is painful. He can’t even meet her eyes as he says that her brother is a bad person.

Ah-rim says that he’s not a bad person, thinking to herself that if he were a bad person he wouldn’t have talked to her in the first place. She says that when she finds her brother she wants to show him that she’s studied hard and has a good life, and that she hopes he lives a happy and guilt-free life.

Ah-rim agrees to go study abroad if he’ll pay her tuition, which seems to relieve him and he tells her to just pay it forward later. She says that she always planned to ask her brother to fix her scar when she found him, and tells Ha-jin that she’ll just have him fix it. That night she thinks of the nice things Ha-jin has done for her, and cries to herself as she thinks that if he can do those things for her, she’ll go away to study for him.

Tae-ha and Yeo-reum take a meandering walk, talking about not much, and Yeo-reum comments that they could actually become friends. Tae-ha jokes that she’d make a bad friend, but he’s serious when he says that if they lose touch again he’ll accept it this time.

But in their thoughts, they both worry that they wouldn’t be able to forget this time around, though it would be better if they could. As they walk together silently, Yeo-reum wishes she could hold Tae-ha’s hand or touch his face like she did that night she had been drinking, and his thoughts echo hers as he considers pretending he’s drunk and grabbing her hand, or even kissing her. They both wonder what the other would think if she admitted that her feelings are being swayed and if he admitted that he still likes her.

Before either of them acts on their thoughts, Yeo-reum turns her ankle and Tae-ha catches her, pulling her close for a moment. They stand there for a moment each affected by the closeness, but Tae-ha lets go of Yeo-reum’s arm and she backs away.

She sits on a bench where Tae-ha takes off her shoe to check her ankle, fussing at her for wearing heels. He looks up to see that she’s on the verge of tears, and he looks stunned, as if he’s realizing that she might actually be feeling some of the things he’s feeling.

Ha-jin calls Yeo-reum repeatedly the next morning, but she’s not picking up. He calls Joon-ho who tells him she’s not home, and Ha-jin remembers that she was having dinner with Tae-ha and starts to assume the worst. Sol hasn’t heard from her either and she knows that Yeo-reum admitted she’s falling for Tae-ha again, and yells at poor Joon-ho for telling Ha-jin to check their workshop.

The workshop is locked and empty, so Ha-jin heads to the house to wait with Joon-ho and Sol. Nobody can reach her, and Joon-ho figures out from Sol’s behavior that she’s scared Yeo-reum is with Tae-ha. He says that he kept their past a secret from Ha-jin while it was just Tae-ha hanging around, but if they’re seeing each other now, he won’t stay quiet anymore.

In desperation, Sol calls Director Yoon to ask if he knows where Tae-ha is, but he says Tae-ha isn’t answering his phone either. Nobody has seen or heard from him or Yeo-reum since they went to the site the day before. Yoon heads to Tae-ha’s place where he hilariously backs into the house, yelling loudly so as to alert anyone who might not want to be caught in a compromising position.

But Tae-ha is there alone, innocently unaware of all the commotion. We see that Yeo-reum, thank goodness, merely spent the night at her mother’s place. Gi-eun wakes her up and tells her to check her phone, since it’s been ringing like crazy.

Tae-ha defends Yeo-reum’s honor to Yoon, saying that she would never spend the night with him when she’s got a boyfriend. He remembers the previous evening when she twisted her ankle and said that she was crying for no reason. He’d offered to take her home but she said she was going to her mom’s to ask her why she gave birth to someone like her.

Tae-ha insists that he and Yeo-reum didn’t cross any lines, again saying that she especially wouldn’t do something like that. He insists that he’s trying his hardest to get over Yeo-reum, and Yoon looks properly chastened.

Yoon tells Sol where to find Yeo-reum, and everyone breathes a sigh of relief. Yeo-reum arrives home all chipper like she didn’t just scare every single one of her friends to death, but Ha-jin wants to talk privately. He tells her that he worries about her because she does whatever she wants, but she’s still curious why everyone was calling her so much. She knows Ha-jin was suspicious despite his denials, and she gently chastises him for not trusting her (says the girl who wanted to hold another man’s hand the night before?).

Yeo-reum goes to wash up and Ha-jin picks her rumpled jacket up off the bed, dropping her cell phone to the floor. When he leans over to pick it up, he spots the box of keepsakes that Tae-ha gave to her, with the corner of a photo peeking out. He tugs it free to see a sweet picture of a ten-years-younger Yeo-reum, and he smiles as he takes out the box, eager to see more.

But when he opens it, Ha-jin is stricken when he sees the proof of Tae-ha and Yeo-reum’s five-year relationship. Photos, notes — everything is right there, leaving nothing to misinterpret. His hands shake and his face blanches as he realizes that all the time Yeo-reum has been asking him to trust her, she’s been lying to him.

COMMENTS

Well, it’s all out in the open now. I think that the fallout is going to be horrific, mostly because of the way Ha-jin had to find out about Yeo-reum and Tae-ha. As understanding and forgiving as he is with Yeo-reum, I really feel that if she had come clean about her history with Tae-ha sooner, he could have worked with her to get past it. But now he knows that she’s been lying to him, which I know for me, would be even bigger of a deal than the fact that they dated in the first place. They could survive as a couple if she had been honest from the beginning, especially since Yeo-reum’s never had any intention of getting back together with Tae-ha. But I don’t think Ha-jin will be able to forgive her for this, because not only did she lie to him often and repeatedly, but she got his closest friend Joon-ho to lie to him too.

Mostly this episode was about the question of whether what’s important is your actions or your feelings. Both Tae-ha and Yeo-reum have now admitted they love the other, or at least are falling for each other again. They insist that they’re doing nothing wrong because it’s their actions that matter, but is that really true? I wonder, if we asked Ha-jin, how he would feel if he knew that his fiancee loves another man — somehow I don’t think that knowing that she loves someone else but chooses to marry him in spite of that, would be much comfort. I think it’s safe to say that when you set out to marry someone, you want to be the only person in their heart. And it’s hard enough for him to know that he loves her more than she loves him, so I highly doubt he would be okay with marrying her when he knows that she loves another man.

I do think it’s good that Tae-ha and Yeo-reum have kept their actions honorable despite what their hearts want. Neither of them set out for this to happen or wants to be in this position, and they’re trying their hardest to not let their feelings make them behave in a dishonorable way. Which is great, because if nothing else Yeo-reum can always say she never physically betrayed Ha-jin. She did try not to fall for Tae-ha again, in fact she put up a heroic fight, but it’s like she told Sol — he knows her better than anyone in the world, and his feelings this time around are sincere, so how could her heart NOT respond to that? She didn’t want it, and she fought it, but it happened anyway, so I don’t hold her at fault for her feelings. But what she wants for her life is stability and that’s what Ha-jin will give to her.

I just think that no matter what your head wants, you won’t be truly happy if you deny your heart. Marrying Ha-jin when she loves Tae-ha may make Yeo-reum content and secure, but it won’t make her happy, not for the long haul. I understand her decision because when you dated a man you loved and planned a future with, only to have him seemingly stop caring about you and your needs, having a man who loves you more and puts your needs first is mighty attractive. So I understand her insistence on marrying Ha-jin; I just worry. Choosing a partner for security and stability is a sound reason to marry, and has worked for millennia. But I think she’s setting herself up for a lifetime of so-so love and wondering what she could have had if she had chosen the love of her life.

And I think it’s wonderful that Tae-ha has stopped pressuring Yeo-reum and is honoring her wishes, even though it’s hard for him, but he’s fully committed to giving her what she wants. I just hope he finds out soon that she’s falling for him again, because I want to see him really fight for her. He has never done that, because he got her so easily in the beginning, and when they met again he mostly just thought all he had to do was show up and she’d fall for him again. I want to see him really, truly fight for her, and prove to her that this time his feelings and his commitment are strong and that she can feel safe falling in love with him again. I think he can give her all the stability and security she wants, AND the love of a lifetime. He just needs to show her he can do it.

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1 SoSun

October 1, 2014 at 8:19 AM

I can't root for Yeo Reum and Tae Ha. Because I think she's a bad person. In fact,I can't root for her with anyone. Why didn't she still tell Ha Jin the truth?
Then she knows she's developing feelings for TH again but still wants to marry HaJin, nope, she's an awful person.
Plain awful
Both guys are better than she is.

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Joanna

October 1, 2014 at 9:00 AM

Ha Jin still hasn't stopped lying to Ah Rim, either. It's heartbreaking.

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hipployta

October 1, 2014 at 11:58 AM

But Hajin isn't marrying Ah Rim or expecting their relationship to be any deeper

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AJ

October 1, 2014 at 12:04 PM

But doesn't he know Ah Rim wants more? And isn't honesty the gentler kinder response to that in the long run?

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joanna

October 1, 2014 at 12:45 PM

I actually believe that their relationship is so crucial to the identity of of each of them that it is even more important that he connect with her than with a potential marriage partner. By hiding his identity from Ah Rim, Ha Jin is stuck hiding from everyone, including the woman he wants to marry. Even if he tells Yeo Rum, finally, that they were orphans together, his silence seems to deny Ah Rim the emotional connection she wants. Is it ok to.try to soothe his conscience (because he does feel tremendously guilty) by giving her monery and sending her far away? I think the drama draws a clear parallel between the two self-protective silences.

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Carlos

October 1, 2014 at 9:51 AM

It was actually Joon Ho who is to blame for that. Actually if not for Yeorum's friends she wouldn't have to be tangled back with Tae Ha, Sol wanted work and Joon Ho does not want to tell Ha Jin about Tae Ha. Granted her responses are questionable but she is far from cause of the problems.

I also can't root for Yeo Rum and Tae Ha but I hate Tae Ha more than Yeo Rum, right from the start she drew the line with him but he was the one who keep trying to sway her. Granted she made a mistake with her confession on him in the pathway but apart from that her actions with him has been really acceptable. It's also not a new man he was "emotionally cheating" with but a man from her past which obviously she had still lingering feelings for. However, reality is we all have some lingering feelings for our exes, we can't possibly wish ill for every one of them, even those that cheated we (or at least I for one) wish to find happiness for (her) them.

Some say that Hajin and Yeo Rum's relationship is doomed from the beginning with how they handle things, but I actually think that they are just in a process of "discovering love" and are just on their way to the peak. It's quite annoying how Tae Ha disrupted their improving "faux" relationship and right when they are starting to communicate and realize how to "truly love" each other, Tae Ha manages to sabotage the relationship. Granted he wants to improve Yeorum because he thinks he knows Yeorum better but Hajin has just entered the field and is now slowly beginning to understood the deeper skins of Yeo rum. Yeorum is also starting to learn how to trust and depend on Ha Jin. I'm really hoping that Hajin does not let go of Yeorum easily just because Yeorum thinks that this is the deep end of their relationship.

Episode 15 will determine whether Yeorum is despicable or not, I do believe (and wants to believe) that she broke up with Hajin because she also has feelings for him and does not want to hurt him any further because she knows she has been falling back to Tae Ha. What she needs now is a "time out" to settle her feelings with him. If she goes back to Tae Ha because of her "current" feelings is stronger she will definitely lose all my respect.

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Phi

October 1, 2014 at 10:48 AM

amazed me that people keep blaming Taeha for Yeoreum & Hajin's problem, or even things that Sol & Joonho made Yeoreum does.

Taeha was going after Yeoreum at the beginning but Yeoreum clearly wasn't swayed. From EP.11 on, Taeha clearly shows he's doing his best to hold off his love for her

And yet he's is "disrupting", "sabotaging" YR-HJ faux relationship? What happened when Hajin asked Yeoreum to stop working with Taeha? Her answer is no. People will blame Taeha AGAIN for offering the job in the first place right? *chuckles*

It's excusable for Yeoreum's lingering feelings but Taeha should not have?

You seem to watched EP.12 already and if HJ's trying to hold on obsessively is healthy to you then I have no words. Let alone 'punishing' her by dragging her around for 5 hours on high heels, KNOWING she's hurt. Is that physical abuse?

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sia

October 1, 2014 at 10:59 AM

Noone, phi is blameless here.
YR is still the worst amongst them though

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Carlos

October 1, 2014 at 12:00 PM

Why is Tae Ha excused from the blame when it was he who put gasoline on the fire? Is he not guilty of it just because he realize and is sorry that what he did is wrong? (On a different note, I guessing if you're following My Secret Hotel you'll also be supporting the ex husband who is openly manipulating the female lead and is sabotaging her current relationship because he wants to be with her) *chuckles*

So Tae Ha is not disrupting their relationship? Put yourself in her position, (just my opinion but simply on the principle of professionalism) Yeorum is actually not in the wrong when she declined to resign, she did tell Ha Jin that that will be her last work with Tae Ha.

I am not saying that there are no problems within the HJ/YR relationship but if not for Tae Ha they would have been resolving those issues instead of adding fuel to the problems their relationship. Just as an individual Yeorum and Ha Jin is had set their walls set so high that either one of them is not willing to break it, this episode however showed how Ha Jin is willing to break down his barriers so as to let Yeorum in. This is clearly a huge step in solving those problems in the relationship.

The reason why I deemed Yeorum's lingering feelings for Taeha excusable and not his is that her feelings for him only started to bubble up after he openly acted on his "lingering feelings" for her. He knows that Yeorum is in a relationship with a good man yet he continues to pursue her. Also Tae Ha is destroying a relationship based on his "lingering feelings" why is that excusable?

Also why is it wrong that Ha Jin tries to hold on to their relationship? She was his fiance after all. If your fiance suddenly wants to break it off with you and you don't try to at least hold on to it then that's more laughable. Whenever one of my friends breaks up and do "stupid" things just to get back together with his/her ex I often laugh at them but reality is I also do those "stupid" things, point is, you want to try to hold on to the relationship because that is how the relationship grows.

The only statement that I do not contest with you is that of your last sentence, Ha Jin was so in the wrong to "punish" her but then again that doesn't mean that Tae Ha is still better than him.

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Phi

October 1, 2014 at 1:21 PM

I don't watch My Secret Hotel so I can't compare the 2 ex-es' actions if they're ill intentions

It's not hard seeing the project putting a toll on YR-HJ relationship. If Yeoreum decides to be professional (as you suggested) and stays on the project till it ends instead of resigning as Hajin suggested, that's ok. So when she broke up with HJ when he asked her again in EP14, it's professionalism too? or she can't take it any more?

With the job offer, TH & YR meet more often = more chance to sway. BUT when Taeha ottered the project, he was partly curious of Yoereum, but for the most part, her style & design fits with what his company is looking for. He didn't throw the job out there with malicious intention to break up YR-HJ. At one point he even asked Dir. Yoon to see how much the penalty is if he break off the contract with her but Dir. Yoon said it's not easy to find company that fit with what they're looking for...

Clearly there're issues of trust & honesty with Hajin & Yeoreum from the start with or without Taeha existence:

. Hajin turned the GPS on Yeroreum when she didn't tell him where she was.
. When Yeoreum was about to tell Hajin about Taeha, Hajin he went how could YR spend a night at some strange guy she just met so easily
. Hajin continues to lie to Yeoreum when she told him not to meet Ahrim again.
. He left Yeoreum on the street an went after Ahrim instead (when YR saw them in front of the office)

If it wasn't Taeha telling Yeoreum stop suspecting on Hajin & Ahrim and Yoereum is the only one to him (Hajin)... I'm sure if Taeha could had broken them off much sooner if he's really want to or such a bad guy.

Taeha was pursuing YR actively when he thought Hajin cheated YR with Ahrim. But when he knows Hajin is a good guy, not a cheater, loves Yeoreum and YR is happywith HJ, TH backed off and said good things for HJ.. Before this, YR wasn't swayed by TH at all.

As for holding on. I don't mean right there when they broke off. imo, it's clear that it's painful for both YR & HJ to forcefully hold on to the relationship when it obviously not healthy for them. Sure, one can't give up the relationship without trying but YR & HJ have tried and tried yet it makes no progress. It's the matter of when to hold vs. holding on blindly, and knowing when it's time to let go. (especially when it turns abusive like that 5hrs walk in high heels in EP.14)

I don't mean to make you like Taeha but I just want to point out a few things there.

sia

October 1, 2014 at 2:45 PM

Its obvious you don't want to see TH as doing wrong in any action. Alas, some of his actions have been truly despicable.
That goes for all 3 leads though. All terrible people. Kmt

AJ

October 1, 2014 at 3:24 PM

The ex in My Secret Hotel is completely different from the ex in DOR. The whole vibe of the former is screwball romantic comedy -- the ex there is the boyishly charming Cary Grant or Clark Gable trying desperately to win back the beautiful and sophisticated ex-wife Claudette Colbert from her new suitor, he ever reliable Ralph Bellamy.

My Secret Hotel is really nothing like the "romantic comedy" of DOR which is in the I Need Romance mode. DOR is mopey realism (to me -- I know others see a lot more to love in it than I do) not the giddy fun I delight in while watching My Secret Hotel. Guess I just prefer Nick and Nora Charles to the couple from Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf ... (yeah, I know, my screen references date me.)

Phi

October 1, 2014 at 3:55 PM

@sia, I didn't say Taeha is fault free. Some of his actions may be questionable but I don't see any that is despicable

The 3 of them have their flaws and complex but they're not immoral flaws. And that is why I want to see what this take them.

Sharon

October 2, 2014 at 6:23 AM

Nothing wrong with keep relationship as hard as you can. But don't blame your partner or getting hurt if they not keep attention to you. They might be beside you but their heart and soul belongs to someone else…

Ha Jin needs to know how to control his emotion, anxious and giving trust before proposing someone to marry him. If during dating he already shouting at YR so freely and embarrassed her in front of other people, I'm sure when they marry he doesn't hesitate to hit or slap her…Just saying...

Sharon

October 2, 2014 at 6:28 AM

Tae Ha didn't disturb HJ/YR relationship. Because TH always in her heart and mind. Did you really watch this episode?? In this episode she said, she was pretending to drunk because she would have an excuse to touch his cheek (episode 1 scene)…and after they broke up, every time she saw someone like Tae Ha, she hope it was really him.

isnin

October 1, 2014 at 11:50 AM

** SPOILER ALERT**
I forgot this earlier too.

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selina

October 1, 2014 at 8:51 PM

@Carlos, I'm not saying Tae-Ha is completely faultless or blameless (he along with YR's friends with their bad advice and helping her along in keeping her secrets and lies bare some responsibility) but when it comes down to it I "blame" (if I have to) Yeo Reum and Ha Jin for the destruction of their own relationship. They are the ones in a committed relationship with each other so with or without outside interferences they should have done whatever need be to hold on to each other. However my belief is the with or without Tae-Ha their relationship was doomed because Ha-Jin never really knew or understood Yeo Reum because she never really let him in. She had all these walls up and even after a year and even after TH's advice to give him (HJ) the opportunities he never had, Yeo Reum had no intention of letting Ha-Jin in.

This episode was the perfect time for Yeo Reum to put forth the same effort that Ha Jin put in. What Ha-Jin shared with her wasn't pretty and it wasn't easy but he loved her enough to be vulnerable in front of her and letting her see the real him. Yeo Reum on the other hand yet again shared nothing of the same magnitude of herself. That night would have been the prefect opportunity to share about her father (if she can keep HJ's secret about his adoption status why couldn't she bring herself to trust that HJ would show her the same curtesy of comfort and understanding and keep the secret from her friends until she is ready of them to know?). She had no intention of telling him this just as she had no intention of telling him about Tae-Ha and that, that inability to fully be all herself with HJ is why they would have never worked out. She also should have stopped working with TH a long time ago and even if she needed to work with him for the money. She never should have allowed herself to go on those "work trips" which included enjoying lunches, arguing, about the past, getting advice, etc, etc from TH. Yeo Reum is responsible for her actions as much as TH is responsible for his, but she is in a relationship and he is not. The moment she started enjoying his company (even though she wouldn't admit it) and went beyond professional, was the moment she should have put her relationship first and just stop all contact (let Sol handle things) with TH and she just couldn't. Both she and TH tried (wasn't the best of efforts but they tried) and been trying but it just wasn't working. The kdrama heart want what the kdrama heart want and nobody and none of them bear more blame than the other or are more blameless.

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im_eve

October 8, 2014 at 7:17 AM

i actually think that the drama is brave enough to showcase this, because this happens in real life. life isn't always black and white. and we sometimes are faced with choices which are too difficult to decide on. i can't even say one is the mind's choice while one is the heart's. i think both entities are involved with both men. and tho we 'know' it's the right thing to do to choose immediately and not let the other on for so long... sometimes choosing does not take that short a time, or is that easy. it's not always easy to just break someone's heart, especially when you are in a situation where you are very confused. because doing so abruptly might mean breaking the heart of the person you actually truly love. i'm not sure if others will understand this, but that is how i view their situation. so, no, i don't hate her, she's not perfect, she could do better, but she's not a bad person for not wanting to hurt ANYONE, including herself.

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2 Keanu

October 1, 2014 at 8:26 AM

Just curious. Nam Ha Jin's real name is Ahn Jin Soo. So, means his family's name is same as Ahn Ah Rim. Don't tell me later on writer will make they're sibling without knowing each other. Because if they're sibling, means Yeo rheum-Tae ha endgame would difficult to happen…TT..TT..

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Phi

October 1, 2014 at 8:33 AM

nope, it's 100% sure HJ & AR are not blood related. Just happens to have the same last name

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Keanu

October 1, 2014 at 8:34 AM

Excuse me to add this, but I love to see Tae Ha-Yeo Reum together. Whenever they're together, what I can see is fireworks everywhere…XD

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Kandiboo

October 1, 2014 at 10:12 AM

Kids from the same orphanage usually have the same last names and occasionally similar middle names given by the caretakers. So they aren't blood related - it was stressed in the series quite a few times

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houstontwin

October 1, 2014 at 10:30 AM

Are foundlings given a common last name by the orphanage?

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Kandiboo

October 1, 2014 at 10:33 PM

yes they are.

as it goes actually somehow the last names tend to be a little less common. also with the Korean (and Chinese) naming system the middle character is usually is the same for the the same gender kids (ie the other boys would be probably be Ahn Jin-x; and the girls Ahn Ah-x). but it can be the same last character as well.

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3 Because of Reasons

October 1, 2014 at 8:52 AM

Thanks for the recap, LollyPip!

I've seen this drama's title translated as both Discovery of Romance (as is done at DB) and Discovery of Love, and the more I see of it, the more I think Discovery of Love is definitely the more fitting title. Because it isn't about the sweetness and light and excitement and sentiment of romance, it's about how to love, about the nitty-gritty of nurturing and sustaining love over the long-term.

I remember my mother telling me that love isn't just a feeling, it's an action, it's a choice, and it's not always easy. And I really like how the series is exploring those ideas and the complications of loving, the choices we make, the ways love challenges us and can hurt us, the ways in which we can be careless or thoughtless with our love. That was something I really liked, that really moved me, about the original I Need Romance. I was disappointed by INR2 and I Need Romance 2013; I read an interview somewhere where the writer said that those installments moved away from the realism of the original to more conventional rom-com fantasy/fairytale. I feel like with Discovery of Love, she's back to the bittersweet realism of I Need Romance 1, and I think it's great.

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4 harmonyfb

October 1, 2014 at 8:53 AM

Told ya that the box o'memories would be the fuse that would blow YR/HJ up.

Is it sad that I wanted the whole episode to be about Sol and Joon Ho? OMG, I loved watching him practicing his confession - and Sol puncturing his drama-induced bubble.

I'd pay to watch a spin-off with just those two characters (especially since I really don't like any of the lead characters - Ha Jin has anger issues and is withholding, Yeo Reum is all about herself, and Tae Ha is kind of a douchebag.) Sol + Joon Ho 4-eva!

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Phi

October 1, 2014 at 9:32 AM

"Tae Ha is kind of a douchebag" ~ makes me wonder if it's the same drama we're watching lol

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harmonyfb

October 1, 2014 at 1:21 PM

Well, when he gets lovesick, his staff immediately notices that he's not being a jerk anymore (what a dead giveaway ::laugh::).

He also pokes when he'd be better served by keeping his mouth shut (::cough::episode 14::cough::). I'd say I probably like him best out of the main three, but I still would rather watch Sol & Joon Ho. :)

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Phi

October 1, 2014 at 3:59 PM

hmm I really have no clue what parts you refer to.... XD Staff as Dir. Yoon? if so, I don't really take 'jerk' literally :D

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isnin

October 1, 2014 at 9:36 AM

I love Sol & Joon Ho & Yoon & Eun-Gyu.
They should call the drama NUMBER TWELVES.

Really, I just love the actress Kim Seul Gi.
She's brilliant.

I loved Kim Seul Gi in Flower Boy Next Door, SNL Korea & even in Surplus Princess. I can't wait to see what she'll do next!

Yoon Hyun Min (Joon Ho) was also FANTASTIC in Witch's Romance. I'm so glad to see him in another drama...hope he gets more & better roles!

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harmonyfb

October 1, 2014 at 1:22 PM

Really, I just love the actress Kim Seul Gi.
She’s brilliant.

I agree! I wish she'd get a lead role. :)

They should call the drama NUMBER TWELVES.

Yesssssss. I'd definitely watch that!

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Sharon

October 2, 2014 at 3:47 AM

I like Do Joon Ho-Sol. But if the main story is them, I don't think I could watch continuously. Their love story just like an ordinary k-drama which easily to predict…No offense

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harmonyfb

October 2, 2014 at 4:31 AM

But it would be sweet and funny, and I wouldn't want to reach through the screen and slap them (*I'm looking at you, Yeo Reum and Ha Jin.*)

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Sharon

October 2, 2014 at 7:39 AM

Hahaha...

Phi

October 1, 2014 at 9:37 AM

The fluffs are cute, but it's TH-YR-HJ-AR developments that makes me turn in every MON-TUE :)

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Phi

October 1, 2014 at 9:38 AM

wasn't meant to be a reply here.

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5 owl

October 1, 2014 at 8:58 AM

aauugghh! *hands covering face, head in lap*

see you in ep 14, that's all~

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6 whilethemusiclasts

October 1, 2014 at 9:06 AM

One week left!!! I'm still unsure of how things will turn out in the end. I just want them all to be happy. Ugh!

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7 Mrs. Jang guem suk

October 1, 2014 at 9:21 AM

Soooooo now its gonna get real ?

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8 cingdoc

October 1, 2014 at 9:21 AM

The only Discovery of Love that I want to happen is Sol and Jin Ho <33333

@samsooki sorry, no dissertation here ;) .....

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9 shaynanigans

October 1, 2014 at 9:46 AM

"Choosing a partner for security and stability is a sound reason to marry, and has worked for millennia."

When I was a teenager, by (then) boyfriend's mother and I had a discussion about this very thing. She told me "You don't marry for love, you marry for stability."
I looked at her perfect house, (mostly) perfect boys and seemingly perfect life and realized how sad her words were. And no, I didn't marry the boyfriend.

After being jilted from her first relationship with Tae-ha, Yeo-reum is trying to be smart with her future. Thus why she is with Ha-jin. They are sweet together, but there is no chemistry between them.

Not that Yeo-reum and Tae-ha have both grown up and come to terms with what they want in life they are more of a match than Yeo-reum and Ha-jin ever will be.

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Wiha

October 2, 2014 at 5:46 PM

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10 youcallitwinter

October 1, 2014 at 9:51 AM

I am so legitimately confused how to feel right now because I'm getting this feeling that I've gotten some time into pretty much each of the I Need Romance series- the inevitability of the ship. And I don't mean inevitability in terms of that the two leads are destined to be together, are made for each other, will always find each other, etc. etc. Because it's definitely arguable that most of the INR ships were "made for each other", and INR-1 in particular didn't personally appeal to me on that angle. I mean inevitability in the terms that regardless of how the story develops, regardless of how the relationships play out, regardless of anything that anyone does, the couple that existed prior in time is going to be the definitive endgame.

Obviously this is a Your Mileage May Vary scenario, and it's a personal opinion, but it's personally always made me :s a bit. I don't have uniform reactions to the series; I disliked the INR1 ship, loved the INR2 ship, thought the INR3 ship was the healthiest and liked them fair enough. And yet, throughout, in each series, I keep getting this feeling of stasis, because there is always so much exploration of the character inevitably, consistently being unable to move on because of their past. Every time they try and move on- sometimes to far better relationships (INR2, though I shipped canon hard, even I could tell that the secondary ship was far better for the emotional health of everyone involved), they're stopped in their track by memories of good times in the past. It's always "this person understands me", even though most times it's because the person in question has known the female lead for a significant amount of time (10 years in the first, practically childhood in the second), and has been in a close relationship with her, where, it's rather inevitable that they WILL know a lot about her.

DOR has been different in this regard; because we can actually see the issues with HJ/YR that exist regardless of TH. Not to mention that TH has been one of the only male leads to analyze and realize what went wrong in the past and his part in it and try and make amends. But, and I genuinely feel this; the show isn't capitalizing on that. The problem is that right now we're not seeing them implode because of their issues, which are so many, we're seeing them implode because of the TH factor. Because the implosion is fairly unilateral, where nothing on HJ's side has any impact on the story; i.e. no revelation affects his feelings or changes his position in the dynamic, and in that regard, the story is completely failing to convince me of one of the ships on which a major chunk of time has been spent.

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youcallitwinter

October 1, 2014 at 9:52 AM

Their superficiality in handling their issues, their distrust and suspicions and unequal emotional investment- all significant issues- aren't explored half as much as TH/YR's past emotionally affecting them in the present is, which makes the latter the bigger factor in the events that take place. Because half the time YR/TH are with each other, they're remembering how good the past used to be (when they're not remembering how bad it got), and how many plans they'd made that never came to fruition and making up for things that went wrong, instead of developing a definitive dynamic in the present. I'm not saying it can't happen or makes no sense, because of course it makes sense, it's even realistic, it's just that it happens every single time in the INR series.

And because of that I always end up getting this feeling of stasis at some point. Because, in this case then the entire relationship dynamic in the present is contingent on YR's feelings, which obv isn't a bad thing at all; but it does mean that a lot of exploration of causality, of why something doesn't work out even if you try, etc., is sidelined. She could easily leave HJ and go to TH, and there wouldn't even be much need for the angst (except on HJ's part), but the reason we're given is, that she gives is that she loves HJ. And again, we can tell why because the drama has developed it very well- he's the security, while TH's someone she's already ~failed with once. But the problem is that though I know it, I'm not seeing it. I'm supposed to believe that she's torn, but again, I'm not seeing why either because there are practically no moments on the show that HJ affects her in any significant emotional way and the relationship is so lopsided that all the emotional impact there is sort of lost for me, even though I feel like the show is trying to make it an ~equal ~battle. Like I loved HJ's confession that he constantly has to back down because he's more in love with YR, but the confession itself changes nothing, just like his reveal about his adoption changes nothing, his relationship with Ah-rim changes nothing, and which is the case with pretty much every big scene with YR/HJ; nothing that they do changes anything about them, even though we're given lines about how the real test is sticking it out, even if you fight, which they actually do, but again, that also changes nothing, and the sole factor keeping them together, as it has been through the beginning is that YR hasn’t yet left. There are so many big reveals with them that should materially affect their relationship and yet…just don’t.

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youcallitwinter

October 1, 2014 at 9:52 AM

I feel like there's nothing that HJ can possibly do which will make YR love him any more, which, though insanely realistic, sort of bothers me in realm of narrative because I feel that nothing should be inevitable, and when no action of theirs changes anything about a particular ship, then the alternative ship is inevitable, which, I feel is a drawback in a show which floats two male leads as equal contenders, unlike most dramas where the second leads is never really in contention at all. I feel like in dramas of this sort there should be cause-and-effect, actions-and-reaction, which is what makes stories interesting for me. The causes might be unstated, subconscious, etc., but they exist. Of course, often love has no reason, but when it's a fictional story, love that has no reason and exists just because personally never appeals to me. Oh well, I guess I'm just not the falling in love at first sight sort. /sigh.

I am also :s at the fact that TH and YR are now projected as understanding each other’s’ feelings the best and the reason why they should be together etc. Because from what I’ve been seeing, the things that they know about each other are the ones that one has explicitly stated and the other remembers; e.g. YR doesn’t like olives in her sub, TH’s birthday, YR’s dream home, dream job etc., which, imo, is a very different thing from understanding each other. In fact, we’ve already been shown how often they miscommunicated throughout their five year long relationship, whether it was with regards to food or what they needed from the relationship or the situation surrounding YR’s father’s death etc. I have never in the least gotten the feeling that they perfectly understood each other (or at least any more than HJ and YR understand each other, like he knows when she’s faking tears, when she’s genuinely hurt, etc.) And I really don’t think there’s any need to gloss over that in the eleventh hour to make a point about how these two are meant to be. This show has shown excellent psychological depth is why I’m holding it to more exacting standards than I have practically any drama before.

Again, most of this has no correlation to how I viscerally feel about the ships. I love HJ/YR and I love TH/YR, and now I'm waiting to see how the show resolves itself. But it's been a wonderful ride with lots of excellent characters, so though I did complain in this comment, I love practically everything about it and major kudos to everyone involved!

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Spi

October 1, 2014 at 1:04 PM

Zoe! I just came here to read your comments! I searched for your name in all DoR's threads. You have such talent for writing and such insights in the psychology and relationships in this extraordinarily well written drama. I love this show to pieces also thanks to you. Now I am off to re-read what you wrote :))

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youcallitwinter

October 1, 2014 at 2:18 PM

Haha, that is so sweet of you! I am writing way too much in the comments (...which is what I always end up doing whenever I discuss anything and need to learn to shut up :s) so I'm glad that it's not just bothersome to come across the walls of text!

Joanna

October 1, 2014 at 1:44 PM

Your point about how the show has set up the tension between two potential partners and how we could be swayed either way is well taken. I think we do get the bottom-line difference between the two relationships in the next episode, and it's not just the power of pheromones. Or, I should say that I have identified the factor that would be (and has been) the deal-breaker for ME in a relationship. It seems that for some viewers the deal-breaker has to do with honesty or cheating or some definition of that, but for me it has to do with what Sol identified as one of her two factors in a relationship: he has to treat me as a woman and as a human being.

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youcallitwinter

October 1, 2014 at 2:44 PM

Oh, was that not the best line ever, LOVED IT! I haven't thought of it quite that way before but to be treated as Sol says definitely sounds like the basis of an excellent relationship to me. I've seen 14 so I'm having a hard time distinguishing what happened when and hope I'm not spoiling anyone! Although I have to admit that cheating is a deal-breaker for me, because I feel so awful for the person being cheated on that I just can't enjoy the narrative as much- although there are exceptions, like Secret Love Affair, for instance. That way, I guess a lot of my choices are context dependent. But if YR had cheated on HJ (even the emotional blurring is making me uncomfortable), then I would've definitely been affected, because I get very, very uncomfortable watching something like that feed into the insecurities of a person, esp re: a character who is at a weaker position in the power dynamic, because it's so visceral. That kind of desperate love where you're willing to overlook every warning signal because you'd rather delude yourself and you so badly wants the relationship to work out makes me sad for the person involved.

Phi

October 1, 2014 at 4:42 PM

When Yeoreum asked why Hajin & Taeha fought at the billiard place, Hajin told her they fought because Taeha cheated over the game. Yeoreum knew Hajin was lying because she knows Taeha doesn't play foul (that's her words :D ). As for Taeha, when he offered Yeoreum the project, he knows she'll turn it down if she thinks it was for romantic reason. That's why he told her she said she doesn't love him and he doesn't have feeling for her now so there's no reason not taking the project.

That to me is a deeper understanding than just remembering their habits/things said in the past :D

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youcallitwinter

October 2, 2014 at 11:10 AM

Haha, that is true! Although I did think that was life la vie en rose in that it was an idealized expectation from someone these two had once been in love with. Like YR continued working with him even when she did develop romantic feelings, and we've seen TH play foul on occasion in trying to shake YR up! They definitely NOW have a deeper understanding, it's just that I thought the show was trying to lay too much emphasis on them remembering things that the other likes, esp because I feel that so many preferences change in that long a time (the food I liked five years ago etc. isn't the same as what I like now at all!)

Because of Reasons

October 1, 2014 at 12:25 PM

I respectfully disagree about the INR1 ship; what I got about it wasn't that they were "made for each other", but that they were used to each other, knew each other well, had already invested a lot of time and energy into their relationship.

They both tried out something new and exciting (the romance of the title) and in the end they went back to the (relatively) comfortable and familiar, to try to make that work. There was that whole thing about getting all caught up in the excitement of falling in love, being infatuated, being swept off your feet, but knowing that eventually even that new relationship would get to the point where that first flush has worn off and you have to deal with the every mundane nitty-gritty of keeping the relationship going. So I think the protagonist decided that, having already gone through so much with her partner, to stick with what she knew, to play it safe, to try to be happy together, rather than run the risk of disappointment again with someone new. They weren't made for each other, but they'd grown accustomed to each other.

I thought that in that sense the title was kind of ironic, in that it was about romance, but in the end the main couple didn't choose romance; they chose... something else. Stability, security, comfort, familiarity, understanding, a sense of obligation? Based on things I've heard in conversations with relatives and friends who've been married a long time, it felt like a very true-to-life (practical? sensible? somewhat sad?) kind of choice.

I think where Discovery of Romance/Love tries to play with the concept is that Yeo Reum has had established romantic relationships with both male leads. So Tae Ha is simultaneously both the familiar first love and the new love who comes in and rocks Yeo Reum's world; he gets to be both the solid love and the romance. Which in a way makes the ship feel even more inevitable. (INR3 tried something similar, but I didn’t think it really worked there.) But what I like despite that, especially in these last few episodes, is seeing Yeo Reum work through the choice she has to make. So, to us as viewers, it may feel inevitable, but to Yeo Reum (and Tae Ha and Ha Jin), it isn't. There are difficult, painful choices to be made. I've really enjoyed (though that seems like the wrong word) how we've seen people make those choices, and we've heard them talk about their love choices and why they choose as they do (and it's happened in the secondary plot too, with things we've heard from Director Yoon and Sol).

I guess, long and short of it, what I liked about INR1 and this (I didn't finish INR2012, but may get back to it, and didn't like INR3 much at all) is the whole exploration of love as not just about the falling, but the choosing. I am not attached to a particular ship/outcome, but I really like the exploration of how the protagonists get there, so that even if I don’t agree with the choices they make about who...

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Because of Reasons

October 1, 2014 at 12:27 PM

...to be with, I still get a sense of those choices having been live, thoughtful choices with some weight and substance and consideration of the consequences.

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youcallitwinter

October 1, 2014 at 2:15 PM

(I don't know if I'm explaining myself well at all here, but what I mean is that I'm getting a sense, and the show is explaining it as such, that YR is falling for KTH "just because". It has solely to do with the YR/TH dynamic, and in that context, the AR/HJ relationship, HJ's adoption, the pandora's box of doom etc., don't actually affect any material changes in the text as they'd been offset to do. They don't change the dynamics in any way, the power equations in any way. It is NOT, say, YR's suspicion over AR/HJ that led her to being more interested in TH, it's not the implosion of the "nice" myth that HJ had tried so hard to maintain because he was so afraid that YR would leave him otherwise, that has led to YR falling for TH. Because you don't really get the sense that she feels any differently about HJ than she did at the beginning. It's just that she's never felt a whole lot for him since then, but, again, this is not what the show is telling me, since she supposedly loves him. Which is mainly what I mean by inevitability. When HJ's actions and reactions are legitimately a non-factor in the events of the relationship he has with YR, it is hard for me to not infer inevitability.)

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selina

October 1, 2014 at 10:05 PM

Oh, I get you now and I agree and I'm fine with that because now that I look back on things (and especially with episode 14) I feel this is where the story has always been headed. It's all about Yeo Reum and her idea of love and her choices. I don't think the box, AR and all that were there to get a response out of HJ I think they were all there for YR. Of the three the only person who has yet to open the box and looking through it's contents are YR so it's always been a journey about her and her happiness and her choice Because of Reasons explains it better than me, but I got no complaints with the drama because the journey has been very rewarding.

youcallitwinter

October 2, 2014 at 12:11 AM

@selina: I can totally understand what you mean! And YR's journey, for me, has been by far the most interesting and the most dynamic of the ones that I've taken with any kdrama character. The (very, very) few problems I've had that I've talked about have mainly been in terms of narrative, because I feel like things which are made out to be a driving force for various actions should have an actual impact on the text, because they've been used to derive emotional investment from the audience for so long.

For instance, YR keeping her past from HJ a secret had reasons behind it; things that she feared, things that she felt insecure about in her relationship with HJ that had nothing to do with TH, but because the revelation didn't actually change anything, we missed out on getting YR's POV re: what her fears and insecurities in her relationship with HJ were and whether she was afraid he'd react jealously or leave her and whether the idea of that actually emotionally affected her or it was just too borthersome to explain or what. She chose to keep this a secret (and initially, she really didn't have feelings for TH, so her choice was borne largely out of her relationship with HJ), so there are other factors at play in her relationship with HJ that I am interested in because they're also a part of who YR is. Of course this is my personal opinion, but, for the first time, I felt that YR's POV was being limited to her relationship with TH (again not because of the ship, but because of the narrative), while I want, esp at this stage, more of an exploration of her; her individual relationships with Sol and JH and HJ and TH and herself.

So, idk if it makes sense, I also need YR to have a fully realized individual dynamic with HJ, not for shipping purposes, because he exists as an individual part of her life, that is separate from TH-- where she actually even made the choice to marry him, where she had a dynamic with him before TH ever appeared. So I want a little less exploration of the TH factor in the implosion of their relationship, and a little more development in terms of where she knows the exact drawbacks of her individual relationship with HJ and why it won't work, as we, as the audience have been seeing right from the beginning- with, as you mentioned, the blind dates and phone tracking and trust issues, etc. But, right now, even YR sees it more in terms of her having fallen for TH and hurting HJ in the process and being a "bitch", as she says, as the reason for their break-up. Maybe it's just that I'm not particularly interested in either ship (or contrariwise interested in both), that when I feel that the full extent of YR's POV is stopped short by a singular explanation even when there are always multiple factors at play in her decisions, it makes me :s.

Like, if YR spends an episode talking about how she loves HJ and how she's started to like him "more" and that merely falling...

youcallitwinter

October 2, 2014 at 12:12 AM

Like, if YR spends an episode talking about how she loves HJ and how she's started to like him "more" and that merely falling for TH doesn't change anything, then the ease of that ring angle (both in the taking and giving it back) means that I want a fuller explanation of whether YR is an unreliable narrator, is lying to even herself re: the extent of her feelings for HJ etc., without her feelings for TH being the sole explanation for her actions. Because YR explicitly says that she doesn't go to TH not because she's a nice person or ethically sound but because she loves HJ. THAT, to me, is so interesting, because it's the female lead saying that her feelings matter more to her than those of the men she loves (which imo is very rare, and excellent), that she knows she can go to TH and they can be together, but not going is a choice she's making; not because she doesn't want to hurt HJ, but because of her feelings. But then, I want to see the implications of that choice or letting go of that choice (e.g. the ring) in a way that has nothing to do with how hurt HJ is by it and how sorry YR is for hurting him, but what YR is feeling right now as an individual, which is what is interesting to me.

But I'm sure the next two episodes will address my concerns, because if there's one thing that the drama has been fantastic at, it's been taking up the concerns of the audience and having the characters address them out loud!

youcallitwinter

October 2, 2014 at 12:33 AM

(Also, in that if YR hadn't had that conversation with Sol about HJ and TH, I think we would all have assumed that the reason that she wan't breaking up with HJ- even when she clearly has feelings for TH that are perhaps deeper than those she has for HJ- is that she either doesn't want to hurt him, or that she's still afraid of going back to TH because of her past experience with him. But, interestingly enough, it is Yeo-reum herself who forecloses those readings, who explicitly says that her reason have nothing to do with how TH feels or how HJ feels, but how she feels. That if she felt any differently she would have made a different choice. THAT to me is so fascinating, because I would have never inferred that on my own, I would've considered it to be one of the two factors she mentions and dismisses. Which is why I don't want this to become a TH v/s HJ issue, as I felt 14 was geared more towards, but remain in the realm of YR v/s YR.)

Because of Reasons

October 2, 2014 at 9:12 AM

@Selina, I love this observation!

Of the three the only person who has yet to open the box and looking through it’s contents are YR.

That hadn't clicked with me, but now that you've made me realize it, it's so perfect!

Spi

October 2, 2014 at 1:40 PM

Zoe,

About the turn-around regarding the ring, I absolutely agree with you that it looks like it was not a well considered decision. Somehow I totally expected that though. It seems that she has been enduring a great deal weight of her choice to stay with HJ despite her resurgent feelings for Tae Ha. She has been fighting her guilt and enduring Ha Jin’s silent aggression and jealousy so much that at that moment she lost all her control over the rational and rather effortful choice. Or, if it was not a sign of self-control loss, then it is still consistent with her character. Ha Jin knew it. He knew that if he would confront her or stop overlooking things then they would break up. And he never dared to speak harshly to her until then. But then when it happened it was an explosion of anger and it was too much for Yeo Reum who always gives priority to her emotional security, sort of. On the one hand, I feel like this is the deal breaker, there’s no way for Ha Jin and Yeo Reum to overcome this challenge, when Yeo Reum does not have the will to go through it and Ha Jin has been very and perhaps excessively willing to endure it. On the other hand, the haste with which she does this does give me the impression (or wishful thinking?) that she might regret this the next day. When she had her better judgment she had always chosen to stay firm with her conscious choice. Just days before, she had well-behavely admitted Ha Jin that she was unkind to Ah Rim and that she would rectify her mistakes. She also earnestly agreed when Ha Jin said that when there’s crisis they should stay together to go through it. What I want to say is that this is indeed the rock bottom that they hit, but this could be the point where they could use as a leverage to make a real difference in their relationship. The next 2 episodes could be spent on how they make amends and really get to know the worst and best of each other. Or perhaps am I being too optimistic for this ship? I know I might be too much influenced by the ship, rather than the narrative as you guys do so well, but I find it harder to think it would work out between Tae Ha and Yeo Reum. For some reasons, Korean dramas just repeatedly follow the mantra that love is “just because” and that no matter what you do the uncontrollable attraction, which is perceived and the emotions, which are fleeting dictate it all. And I think such a helpless idea about love and relationship is not very healthy. This show so far has been written so well and the writer clearly has a lot of insights in relationships I really hope they would not follow this helplessness idea. (I did not watch I Need Romance 1 and 2 and started I Need Romance 3 but dropped it at episode 6 or 7). I was totally on the Tae Ha-Yeo Reum ship when Tae Ha managed to learn about the truth of the death of Yeo Reum’s father and to make her open up to finding comfort in him regarding that issue. I believe such compassion, not the unexplainable attraction that the show...

Spi

October 2, 2014 at 1:41 PM

I believe such compassion, not the unexplainable attraction that the show is repeatedly emphasizing, to be the most important factor in relationship. Regarding Ha Jin and Yeo Reum, I feel that they have a lot of things to resolve (the trust issue, the insecurity issue, and now this crisis) but there’s one thing that is very precious about their relationship is their determination to stay together. That is something the show does touch on but seem to undermine nonetheless. Sure, persistence might be just pointless and it would just mean unhappiness for both, but it would be such a pity as well if the show would just keep on pinning on the single attraction factor and make it the deal breaker for all. I think I do agree with what you wrote about how much you wish the relationship between Ha Jin and Yeo Reum would be covered more in depth. I am fine with the Ha Jin - Yeo Reum breaking up for good as well actually because I also think it has many serious problems. But I don’t want the rekindled attraction between Tae Ha and Yeo Reum to be the drive behind it. I do understand and appreciate you guys’ point that Yeo Reum is doing most things based on her own choice for her own feelings. However, since we are all surprised at her sudden confession of her resurgence of feelings for Tae Ha (the bit where she looked out the window and waited for him at the workshop), I think it might also be omitted by the narrative that what is behind her actions is actually not her own feelings. I mean, yes, Yeo Reum makes every effort to do things by listening to her own feelings, but at the same time we see how much she has to struggle against her repressed feelings. Her relationship with Ha Jin also progressively gets worse proportionally with her re-connection with Tae Ha and his revelation; whereas, all the big revelations on Ha Jin’s part just have no impact. I feel like it’s more that Yeo Reum *wants* to believe that she is doing things based on her feelings. In fact she is doing things more under the influence of Tae Ha, which is understandable of course because like she told Sol, he is such a special person in her life no matter what. But I would find it unconvincing and unsatisfactory if she would let him come back to her life after all of the determination to be righteous with herself and the consideration for her relationship with Ha Jin just because of mere attraction. It would take a lot, probably not enough to be covered in just 2 episodes (unless they use time leap) to rebuild a romance and a working relationship between Tae Ha and Yeo Reum.

Don’t know if everything I just said is coherent enough for you to get what I mean, I hope so.
This show has so much food for thought and it gets way more interesting when I read you guys’ comments. Please continue to write. I love reading them so much.

youcallitwinter

October 1, 2014 at 2:57 PM

[OKAY, I REALLY NEED TO SHUT UP, SORRY] But in this context, something in LollyPip's review really stuck out to me:

I think this is exactly what I'm trying to get at too (except that her comment is a future projection and my comment is a reaction to what happens to this future projection in episode 14). This would have been the cause-and-effect scenario. But that status quo is so singularly unaffected by so many huge changes and revelations is pretty significant for me in how my views on the narrative are being shaped now.

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selina

October 1, 2014 at 10:26 PM

But then in ep 14 HJ who would normally keep quiet and act like he doesn't know. Doesn't do that...he confronts her head on, then we get the whole scene in the car where answers and explanations and other things are demanded by him (he kinda ruins it by trying to give you know what back). This for is when I think YR made her choice not because of HJ or TH but because of herself ("she loves herself more"). I think in that moment she could clearly see where staying in a relationship with HJ would be headed (one like what her parents had) and she doesn't want that for herself or for him. But I could be reading everything in the show wrong *shrugs*

youcallitwinter

October 1, 2014 at 1:53 PM

I can understand your POV on INR-1, and I think that’s one drama that definitely elicits very, very contrary responses from the viewership. All the responses I’ve heard for it have been very across-the-board; some people love it madly and others loathe it.

Also, I think you’ve done a really good analysis of INR-1, I absolutely agree with your take on it; it’s just that I reacted to those very same elements negatively. Firstly, the cheating angle threw me off the ship completely. I think the exploration of the subject in itself was interesting— the attraction to someone new after having been with someone for very long in a stable relationship where the passion had almost died— but the execution of it really made me dislike the lead male intensely, after which it kind of became difficult to ship someone I disliked with someone I fairly liked. Again, I think, these things are very YMMV, in that my reaction is personal—because in no way is it to say that the way that the relationship played out isn’t realistic, because it most definitely is. In fact those elements—people who’ve invested a lot of time and energy into a relationship sticking to it because of the familiarity and the sheer exhaustion at the idea of going through the process again, is very familiar, I’ve seen it happen in IRL over and over again—but the realism didn’t change the fact that it wasn’t emotionally satisfying for me in the least. Also, because I didn’t feel like the female lead managed to move on at all, or that her feeling for the male lead every really changed, with any and all revelations. I liked CJH’s character, but I would have been fine if the female lead had ended up without either of the guys. YMMV is also how I feel about YR’s character; that I can understand people not liking her because she can be selfish and not-very-nice (although I love those same elements) just like you might not like a person IRL who behaved the same way, but that imo doesn’t mean that she’s not a fantastic character.

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youcallitwinter

October 1, 2014 at 1:54 PM

I really like your idea of TH being both the old and the new love. But, it’s just that I think YR had managed to keep such a distance from him for so long in the drama- most of the resurgent feelings were on his part for the longest time- that I don’t personally don’t get that “new” love feeling at all. I feel like their dynamic is mostly based on the past- including rectifying past mistakes also, of course, but still, the past. It might not be inevitable to the characters as you say, but I’d still argue that it’s inevitable in the narrative, which is the factor that my response is based around. It’s that big reveals in the HJ/YR relationship just aren’t making any difference to the narrative, which begs the question of why they existed in the first place when they don’t seem to have much structural value. These are things that these two characters angsted over constantly from the first episode onwards, and yet even now, the actual revelation changes nothing. Reveals exist for dynamic changes, but here, I get the feeling that if YR had been interested in TH from the beginning itself, nothing would have changed in the narrative, because, apart from YR’s feelings for TH, practically no other factor seemingly makes a material difference. I get that YR is torn at hurting HJ, but I just don’t get the feeling that YR is also scared because she loves him and doesn’t want to let him go and is genuinely torn between HJ and TH. And this, coupled with the fact, that I actually legit did not feel that YR was attracted to TH again till she mentioned that part about waiting for him, means that I AM completely confused by the narrative now. Clearly this is me being nitpicky, but I AM nitpicky about these things, esp from dramas that are so well-written and invite multiple POV’s.

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youcallitwinter

October 1, 2014 at 1:55 PM

And I find the fact that you said this: is the whole exploration of love as not just about the falling, but the choosing, absolutely fascinating, because YES, THIS EXACTLY. This is EXACTLY what I go for. And, would you believe that that was actually my issue in INR-1, and is the issue that I’m raising here; in INR-1, for me, it was the illusion of choice. Throughout the drama, there never was any real choice; because there was nothing that the male lead could do (including cheating; which is a deal-breaker for me), that would change what the female lead felt. She ostensibly made the choice, yes, but it felt illusory to me, because of the nature of their relationship. The new, exciting love was not a choice because she was never really into him, and if there’s nothing to choose against, it’s not a choice for me. And here, too, the exploration of love as choosing is what I’m hoping for, but again YR explicitly said that she’s falling for TH, she’s not “choosing” him, she is literally unable to help herself “because he is KTH”. What she is choosing is to not physically cheat. She “chose” HJ, multiple times yes, but the turn-around re: the ring was so quick, that it didn’t feel like there was weight behind the choice. If she’d accepted the ring in the beginning and this had happened after, I would’ve been more receptive to it as a choice. Also, the problem I have with these narratives is that people change (this, actually, INR-3 explored really, really well, even though I wasn’t too into it either), and often the “you remember I like this, because you understand me” rings hollow to me in years of distance, because it’s so often a fictional shorthand to elevate a relationship, even though, when I think of my preferences (food, clothes, music, etc.) from five years back, they’re completely different. This is again why I get that feeling of stasis.

selina

October 1, 2014 at 10:21 PM

@Zoe I just really love reading your reaction to the show because for me since episode 1 I had noticed YR's attraction to TH (her touching his check, that bathroom shower head mishap, in the hotel when she asked if he ever even loved her). If felt like from the get go she should have stayed away you know the saying "the lady protest too much" that was exactly YR to me whenever she would speak or think about TH. Every time she would say something negative or scream out loud I am over you, I felt like girl if you were really over him you wouldn't let his actions get to you like this. She responded when he pulled her chair in in episode 3, she had been starting to enjoy his company (she enjoyed their bickering, and back and forth, and pocking at her) and "work" to me had become an excuse to spend time with him, because when they were together for work, they never kept it strictly professional. She didn't have to have lunch with him, she shouldn't have went to the use me movies with him, nor called him instead of HJ to ask about their (HJ and TH) dinner date. She was playing with fire the moment she saw him in the hotel because both had never really gotten a proper emotional closure to their relationship. This to me is why the second break-up in episode 10 affected both so much. For me it had always been clear even with 5 years and a new boyfriend their attraction and feelings had always laid doormat and then came forth once they saw each other again (if not why the heck would they agree to whatever "interview" in the show they are working on which really go the ball rolling on things). So for me YR's current dilemma of what choice to make, was where I always thought she and the narrative were headed.

youcallitwinter

October 1, 2014 at 1:55 PM

This “choice” part was the same issue that I had with Reply 1994 as well; that the male lead in the endgame ship could keep missing moments, keep missing the right timing and still be part of the endgame ship because he was the guy who was familiar to the lead female, so she’d keep waiting, and all the missed timings were immaterial. While my personal favorite type of narrative is that of 9 Ends 2 Outs where the female lead explicitly stated that love is timing, and which is one of my most favorite dialogues of anything ever. Not only that, but even with the male and female lead having known each other forever, I genuinely felt that the female lead loved- in a way- the other guy she was supposed to love and that leaving him actually hurt her and not just hurt her in hurting him. This is one of the reasons I really like Korean dramas, because of how often this, if not stated, still plays such an important role in narrative, that timing is everything. The second leads so often lose out because of timing. So when I get the sense that timing is immaterial in a particular narrative, my emotional investment automatically decreases. Again, a personal choice.

I think you and I read the text the same way, and mostly just react to it differently, which is very interesting. Thanks for the discussion!

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Because of Reasons

October 1, 2014 at 4:03 PM

Oh, I've really enjoyed reading your thoughts. I feel like there's so much I want to say in response.

I think I get what you're saying about Discovery of Love and the feeling. But you're right that we react to it differently, because what you said about "the entire relationship dynamic in the present is contingent on YR’s feelings" is, I think, the thing that I like. I don't really care that much about her relationship with either Tae Ha or Ha Jin, but I care a lot about her relationship with herself, and her feelings, if that makes sense? Having this exchange with you has made me realize that even with the INR series, my interest was not so much in which man the heroine would end up with (although I didn't like the male lead in INR1 at all), but in what that represented in terms of what she was choosing for herself and her life. So although in both INR1 and 3, the female leads both chose the guy they'd know first, that represented a very different life choice for each of them.

For example, I think Yeo Reum has started to try to recommit to HJ not because of anything he's done or any real change in her feelings for him (she likes him well enough, and probably what she likes most about him is that he likes her a lot), but because of a change in how she views herself. Kang Tae Ha's arrival has made her think about what it's like to be the person who loves more in the relationship, and so she's trying to be nicer to HJ because she doesn't want to feel that she's being as jerky to him as TH was to her. TH's presence has reminded her of the kind of person she used to be, and I see that she's realizing that she sees pros and cons to how she's grown and changed and hardened and she's trying to process that. His presence has shaken up her relationship with HJ, so she's clinging hard to HJ not because of anything he's done, but as a reaction to the turbulence Tae Ha has brought into her life, and how it's shaken up her perception of herself; and also because she wants to be a person who sticks by her choices, she wants to be an honorable person.

So for me (and I emphasise that I am literally speaking about how I, specifically, watch it), the appeal/interest of the show isn't about the competition between the two guys, it's very much about Yeo Reum and her feelings and ideas about love and the kind of love she wants to be in, and how those feelings inform the choices she makes. I'm interested in her internal motivations and internal conflict, but not that interested/invested in the actual choice if that makes sense. (A show that got me fully interested/invested in both was Dal Ja's Spring. I loved that show so much, and I loved that the choice wasn't between a first male lead and a second male lead; it was between the first male lead and the heroine's own need for growth, separate and distinct for her love life.) Anyway, I have loved these past episodes of DoL, because you're...

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Because of Reasons

October 1, 2014 at 4:04 PM

you're right, what HJ does isn't really going to change anything, at this point it's all about Yeo Reum's feelings and how she works through them. And I like that a lot, that focus on her that kind of makes what the two guys do irrelevant.

I think it’s true that we are reading the text more or less the same way, but our responses are different. I've really enjoyed having this exchange with you! And I'm definitely going to check out 9th end, 2 outs.

youcallitwinter

October 1, 2014 at 4:47 PM

I have to say you're absolutely right, because YR has been my primary stake in the drama since day one. I adore Jung Yumi madly and any character she plays is golden to me, but this one is particularly ridiculously well-written. This is the first time I've commented over here at Dramabeans and it mostly started because of all the dislike that YR seemed to generate which really made me D: because I think she is fantastic, simply put.

But again, that IS what affects me most about these dramas; my stake in the lead female. It was watching the INR-1 female lead go through crippling insecurities and self-doubt that made me dislike the male lead and made the show difficult for me because of how much slack I felt it was cutting him to get to a particular point. It's like that disjunct between watching as someone invested in the character, where that you don't want them to make only the narratively interesting choices, which would be your stake as an objective viewer, but the choice that you'd want them to make as a friend- as ridiculous as that sounds. It's the idea of YR's legitimate concerns re: her past with TH being overshadowed by a narrative inevitability that has me worried at this point. HJ, I like fair enough, TH too, but I don't really care who she ends up with, because this drama, for me too, is about YR. Which is why causality is so important to me, because I don't want there to be (what I see as a) narrative stasis that is based on "just because", because there's been such a focus on how she's changed, and I agree so much with your points on her treating HJ better now because she sees herself in him, which has less to do with HJ and more to do with her. YR, we've seen was the one less emotionally affected by seeing TH again and my most favorite line of hers (as I seem to end up repeating in every episode post, heh) is why should I be responsible for your feelings, I should take care of myself first because I feel like that emotional priority is so rarely accorded to female characters, the chance to say that her emotional stability is important, and that she's not responsible for someone else's feelings and shouldn't have to factor them in her actions. SO FANTASTIC. But also, this IS what I'm worried about, the narrative prioritization of a pre-defined inevitability over the organic growth of YR's own changing ideas of love. Because her resurgence of feelings for TH, while natural, is something that I need explored in more time than the show now has, to show how the relationship is moving forward, rather than just being a fall-back on nostalgia for someone YR had once loved. For TH, it's a revelation because he hadn't loved her like this before and it's almost like being in love with her for the first time, but I need to see how, as someone who had a lot of resentment and bitterness left over from her relationship, she definitively comes to terms with that, without TH's...

youcallitwinter

October 1, 2014 at 4:49 PM

...as someone who had a lot of resentment and bitterness left over from her relationship, she definitively comes to terms with that, without TH's regret being posited and privileged over the five years of moving on that she did. The problem for me is that with setting the base for the endgame ship, it's five years of YR's life which are being compromised; as if all her hopes and dreams and ambitions and tastes and preferences have stayed unchanged to act as a marker of someone who really knows her. Because she wasn't shaken up by TH for a fairly long time within the drama (considering she was pretty clear in her stance towards HJ and TH and always made that distinction of HJ being someone she was dating, and wasn't particularly affected by ~hurting TH), the possibility of an exploration of nostalgia vs. residual attraction vs. love is an avenue that is now foreclosed because of time constraints, which I really WANT to see for YR's character. (I'm kind of hoping she leaves both, as I did in INR-1, but I guess that won't happen, haha.)

9 Ends 2 Outs is one of my most favorite dramas ever, the female lead is ridiculously amazing, and there's such an air of realism in the exploration of her character with respect to romance or age or job etc., you should definitely check it out!

selina

October 1, 2014 at 10:41 PM

This. This is exactly how I view and enjoy the drama. I personally have an endgame ship, but if YR ends up not making that choice I will still be happy because I have come to care some much about her views on love, her choices, and what she thinks would make her happy. So I'm invested but not too invested that I will hate the drama and think it the worst thing ever if she doesn't up with my choice.

Because of Reasons

October 2, 2014 at 8:12 AM

@Zoe, this is a late reply, so I don't know if you'll see it, but I totally get what you're saying now, and am nodding my head in agreement.

Because while I care about Yeo Reum and what she is going through, I do have a certain sense that the drama hasn't really made me feel why she's so drawn to Tae Ha 5 years later. We are expected to take it as given that she just is (which is kind of fair enough, because sometimes that's how attraction works), but, you're right, there are complexities involved in meeting up with and having feelings re-kindled with an ex that they haven't explored (on YR's side at least, they've done it somewhat for TH). And if I think about it, I don't feel that the show has really given me a good reason for why Yeo Reum would be so drawn to Tae Ha now five years after their break-up, other than that she just is because they have a history together. I don't need an explanation of her falling in love, because that's how chemistry works, but this time around there has to be more than that, because Yeo Reum isn't that unguarded open-hearted person anymore.

So, yes, he's making her waver, but why? Because she likes his forceful personality? Because they have similar interests and compatible professions? Because she wasn't that into Ha Jin in the first place and so was vulnerable to being distracted? Because he's just like the familiar Tae Ha she knew? Because he's changed from the familar Tae Ha she knew? Because they hae an easy rapport? Because he reminds her of who she used to be and she misses that? Because he's sexy and she feels a strong physical attraction to him? Because he has a nice butt? I have to speculate, because I don't feel that the show has really shown us the why. It just expects us to take it as given that of course she's inexorably drawn to Kang Tae Ha, because she is. And the why matters, because it would enrich our understanding of why Yeo Reum is struggling the way she is, and what she is struggling with, of what Tae Ha represents as a choice for her, as compared with Ha Jin.

So yeah, I get you now. This has been a great conversation! I really like reading your ideas and having a chance to share mine.

youcallitwinter

October 2, 2014 at 12:21 PM

@Because of Reasons

I have an internetless trip to make in about two hours so I can't elaborate all I want to (which could be a potential relief for you, too :P) but that's okay because my thoughts are basically: YES, EVERYTHING YOU SAY. That was exactly what I was trying to get at with my long-drawn, confusing point about inevitability. That inevitability, even in the manner of "just because", often negates choice, so while I am totally okay with YR being attracted to TH (and yes, attraction can totally exist without any "reason" per se), I still want to know, as someone hugely invested in YR, what her feelings exactly are and what elements or factors they're informed by. Whether she's indulging in nostalgia, and trying to live out a future she'd once planned, go back to a time before her father's death when she still had goals and ambitions that ran beyond the everyday business of living or whether she now sees Tae Ha as a potential new future, as someone different than the man she'd planned a future with five years ago. Or, well, you know, she just thinks he's hot and wants to sleep with him. TH's feelings in this regard have been explored really well; whether it be with respect to his attraction to YR or the regrets he has, etc. While with YR, it's been more of a process of remembering the good with the bad, because the bad has colored her memories for so long, and in the process probably also get some emotional closure that she hadn't been able to (especially in that she still sought him after the break-up and he hadn't let her in, so even though she initiated the break-up, it hadn't ended for her right then.) But in the process of moving on, has she fallen in love with the old memories or TH-in-the-present? These are all questions I definitely want answers to. Re: HJ, since her relationship with HJ has been affected by her previous relationship with TH (in regards of how it shaped her views to relationships in general), her new relationship with TH, and her individual dynamic with HJ that has nothing to do with TH, I think that is one of the modes through which her POV is explored too, esp with, as you said, the nature of the choice she's making, and I would love for both sides of the YR v/s YR debate to continue, rather than be subsumed because it's the 11th hour and the endgame ship needs to be established.

selina

October 1, 2014 at 10:35 PM

Oh I can clearly see you and I have different takes on love and all that because I was 1000% behind the endgame in Reply 1994. However this makes reading your comments more enjoyable because it gives me a new perspective on the same issue. I think love is many a things, and timing being just one small part of it. Ultimately to me love is a choice. Timing, feelings, behavior, personality, friends, family, etc etc all factor into love but when it come down to it, it's a choice. Because if I want to (and as characters do) I can choose to give into time or not, choose to give into feelings or not, family, friends, etc, etc but a choice (a decision?) is always made.

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youcallitwinter

October 2, 2014 at 11:04 AM

@Selina: Your comments are excellent too, and lots of fun to read! To be honest I do indeed have a bad habit of trying to objectively justify my very, very subjective choices instead of acknowledging them openly. There's a very good chance that my stake in Reply 1994 was based on just the fact that I was personally more attracted to YYS than anything within the show itself (although my ultimate ship was YYS/Jung Yumi, lmao. The moment she showed up, the sheer possibility of her being involved in the gang and with CB just about blew me brain. I do adore her so much, haha.)

But in the timing answer, I did feel as if that was the best elaboration I'd read of "love", according to my idea of it. Mostly because I interpreted "timing" as this mysterious quality which, for me, includes all the other factors you mention; choice, behavior, personality etc. Like people falling in love at first sight, or people who've never thought of each other romantically falling in love after years of knowing each other, and there's never an exact explanation for why and why now. TH and YR would be a good example there, I feel-- why TH fell so hard for YR now when he didn't before, why YR fell so hard for him at first sight etc. And why some people who like each other keep missing their timing, why one person likes each other more at one point and the other likes them more at another point, etc.. I just felt like I'd never thought of it quite that way before and I'm not huge on ~love (haha, that does sound strange) because I don't think I've ever really been in it, so for me, it mostly exists as a concept, and that moment in 9 ends was like a revelation. :)

selina

October 1, 2014 at 9:44 PM

I think in episode 14 we see some of that come to light and it all comes to head about those issues that Yeo Reum and Ha Jin have (trust, imbalance in their relationship, their ability to make each other happy in the long run). I don't know for me the little things that YR and HJ have said and done have shown me they weren't right for each other. For me from the very first episode where they had the tracker app and he went on these blind dates to please his mother without telling her I was like "ahh these two are doomed to fail, why don't they trust each other?" Also I couldn't understand why Yeo Reum could not bring herself to tell HJ of her and TH's past relationship. It's just like what HJ said, if it was just the past and really over and forgotten/moved on from, she could have easily told him and they could have easily dealt with it. All that but Sol and Joon told her are excuses. YR is a grown woman who made the choice to keep from her boyfriend (and have her friends do the same) something he should have been allowed to know.

I also don't think it's simply the years (thought it does help him) that allows TH to know YR better. TH knows YR better because she allows him to know her. Yeo Reum is open frank, and herself with him in a way that she herself admits she isn't even with friends she has known for more than 30 years. No matter how many years Yeo Reum and Ha Jin would spend together, Ha Jin would never really know Yeo Reum because never allows him to truly know her. She's closed/walled off a big part of herself and the only person she seem to allow to really chip away at that in the present is Tae Ha. Yeo Reum shares nothing really personally or truly vulnerable with Ha Jin...ever. Like Ha Jin says in episode 14, Yeo Reum bottles in her feelings that aren't of benefit to her around Ha Jin and she just never is. Even about her past relationship with TH which could have been such a simple matter to resolve, Ha Jin find that out on his own. YR had no intention of ever telling him. The only personal vulnerable thing after a year of dating and headed towards marriage that Yeo Reum has allowed Ha Jin to know is her money problems. That's it! Something as simple as her work and dream goals, episode 11? 12? was the first time Ha Jin even got to see/be present for that. Mean while we are given present scenes of TH giving YR comfort on a secrets only they two know (it's telling she can tell him when she can't even tell her friends of 30 years), and encouraging a forgotten dream of hers. We are also shown past scenes of them sitting side by side working and sharing dreams. For me I have always seen the weakness of Ha Jin Yeo Reum relationship because for as much as he loves her and she was committed to staying with him, he was getting a shell of her. Whether she believes that to be true or not, he was receiving a shell because she never really let him in. Ha Jin would never know Yeo Reum as well as Tae Ha does not matter the...

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11 TG

October 1, 2014 at 9:55 AM

Ha Jin's lying and giving in really bothered me and I didn't understand it, but given his back story of being adopted at 12, his behavior and personality make total sense. He's always afraid that if he isn't perfect and easy that they'll leave him. So he gives everyone what they want and forgives them for everything quickly because he feels like his whole life is a house of cards that could fall at any moment. It must be very sad and exhausting to live just waiting for the people in your life to leave you. I feel sorry for him.

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12 steph

October 1, 2014 at 10:02 AM

I know i'm in the minority but I think the main pair ending should be YR + HJ. I think that is the more realistic couple than YR + TH. Sure she sways, but her reasoning as to why is spot on. It's because TH was such an important part of her PAST that shaped her to her present. Her present self who knows she belongs with HJ. Not because he's comfortable and easy for her but because that's who she currently loves. While viewers see her dynamic with TH as "passionate and love" I see it as just unresolved left over feelings.

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tee

October 1, 2014 at 10:12 AM

I actually feel that's thats the only thing that makes sense and is HJ and YR.
People are just blinded by TH because he's Eric but logically looking at it, they shouldn't end together. Everyone has feelings for an ex doesn't mean that you guys were meant to be together

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Sharon

October 2, 2014 at 3:44 AM

Personally, I think YR/TH match each other really well. They fight, argue, joking around, sharing, caring and can show themself without hesitation each other. That's the main reason I ship them.

Please stop bashing TH/YR. We see how difficult YR try to stay with HJ and struggle with her feeling. And how difficult TH try to move on. YR/TH both didn't marry yet. But we treat them like they're having the most forbidden love in this world.

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Phi

October 1, 2014 at 10:59 AM

The "unresolved left over feelings" can be a new beginning. It's not rare in real life that past loves get their 2nd chance.

That said, I could careless who Yeoreum ends up with.

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AJ

October 1, 2014 at 12:11 PM

I'm with you -- I love to read the comments here -- they are more "all over the map" than for any show ever re-capped here I think -- but I can't see that either of YR's relationships are worth saving. She's just not a person that has enough left to give after she takes care of herself.

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Phi

October 1, 2014 at 8:05 PM

I think because DoR characters are quite complex and have relatable flaws just like we do that it's so irritating to some people at time.

I ship Yoereum with Taeha because they match each other well and most of all, despite some miscommunication issues when they were young, they have no major secret or lies between these 2.

I hope in EP.15 Yeoreum will take some time out to sort things out on her own. I'm ok she doesn't end up with either man at the end. But judging from the drama's tittle, there'll be probably some sort of otp at the end? :D

oh well, however things turn out, There is no one can not live without. With or without, you have to live. Life goes on - Taeha

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trojan012

October 1, 2014 at 10:43 PM

Phi, as expected. haha.

You should say that you're rooting "Eric" for Yeorum not "Taeha" for Yeorum, because it is quite clear you're blinded.

AJ

October 2, 2014 at 5:02 AM

I have no problem admitting that YR is flawed or irritating. I find her immature, dishonest, and unethical in her closest relationships. But I don't find her complex or relatable because her lies seem to be more contrived plot points to create conflict, rather than a realistic response to finding a new love after having been badly wounded by a past love.

Phi

October 2, 2014 at 3:05 AM

@trojan0212, it's funny how you insist I root for "Taeha" because "Eric" not "Taeha". Blind? so all other commentors here who root for Taeha are blind and all because "Eric"? lol

You ship Yeoreum with Hajin is your choice, why attack others of their choice for being blind? and "Eric" or "Sung Joon" bias?

You didn't want see I said I'm ok with Yeoreum doesn't end up with Taeha?

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Alin

January 29, 2015 at 4:18 PM

and yet you get all defense and stuff when people criticize TH (Eric's character)? basically you only care about TH (Eric's character)

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Aigoooo

October 1, 2014 at 11:15 AM

Discovery of Cheating.. err Romance has put me at a quandary. Both ships are not sea worthy for me so I'll just root for Kim Seul Gi. hehe

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sia

October 1, 2014 at 2:52 PM

I like this comment Aigooooo

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cingdoc

October 1, 2014 at 3:07 PM

Plus one, here, chingu ?

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aisuzieya

October 2, 2014 at 8:34 AM

honestly i dont see anyone cheating here..there are only lies lies lies

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13 isnin

October 1, 2014 at 10:17 AM

Bingo!
Ha Jin fears that the people in his life will leave him if he's not perfect & easy.

밀고 당기기 There is uneven Miltang.
It's all push from Yeo Reum and Ha Jin is all pull.
When you look at how Tae Ha and Yeo Reum interact, the power dynamic is more even.

I'm curious to see how they can wrap this all up in just 2 more episodes.

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14 mariazzang

October 1, 2014 at 10:28 AM

Great recap. I admit to watching this ep quite frustrated about the progress of the relationships and storyline and that pandora's box shoulf have been opened lik, at ep 12.

But reading your recap was a great way for me to reflect on what really happened to ep 13. Thanks! This is what I like reading recaps for.

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15 houstontwin

October 1, 2014 at 10:31 AM

It is fascinating how unlovable the main characters are in this drama. The secondary characters, on the other hand, are so endearing.

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aisuzieya

October 2, 2014 at 8:43 AM

I love the main characters. I kinda find the secondary characters annoying, they dont have much purpose and although Kim Seul Gi is adorable, I find her acting a little lacking, she's best for quirky roles, if only a better actress played her part, the dynamic between her character and YR would be even more memorable.

to me whats truly fascinating is how different each of us interpret the same episode. though we may not always agree here, its been great and fun time reading the comments from everyone.

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16 isnin

October 1, 2014 at 10:37 AM

YR/TH have unresolved left over feelings.
HJ/AR also have unresolved left over feelings.

The only difference is that TH has declared to everyone that he still wants to be with YR. All of them are aware that the decision rests with YR. They are all waiting for her to make her choice.

This drama is doing a good job of making me guess how it will all end!

YR is currently swayed by TH, but she never opened their box of memories. (She couldn't burn it either though.) She took off HJ's ring twice and even handed it back to him!

Will TH will get the girl? If TH/YR is the end game then will HJ just disappear? Will HaJin say "screw all you liars" and go to America to be with his "sister"?

Or....

Will HJ get the girl? How will HJ repair his friendship with Joon Ho? How can he repair his trust issues with YR after he finds out the extent of her lies.

So many questions!!! Great drama so far.

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17 youcallitwinter

October 1, 2014 at 10:39 AM

I wonder if anyone else is at least a little amused- or annoyed, if your're shipping HJ/YR- at the fact that TH knows so much about YR because he knew her at a time when she was young and allowed herself to be open and vulnerable and emotionally available at all times, and it was largely because of their relationship that she became closed off and wary of that same vulnerability and started viewing dating as a power game, and subsequently did not allow HJ into her life to the same extent as she might have if she'd met him before she met TH, which is now actually working in TH's favor because she still sees him as someone who knows her best, which possibly has more to do with who YR used to be than who TH used to be. Now that I think of it-- YR-in-the-past and HJ-in-the-present might have worked out very well!

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bean

October 1, 2014 at 12:33 PM

i wish there was still a thumbs up button because this is a very good point.

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Spi

October 2, 2014 at 2:00 PM

Ouch. This is spot-on.

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18 hipployta

October 1, 2014 at 12:06 PM

Pandora's Box has finally be opened

Game over...

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gustave154

October 2, 2014 at 1:15 AM

Game Over Man!! Game Over!!

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19 August

October 1, 2014 at 1:06 PM

I know this is not the case for everyone else, but frankly I am really enjoying DOR. Mainly because of the cast [Eric Mun, Jung Yu-Mi, Sung Joon, Yoon Hyun-Min, Kim Seul-Gi, & Yoon Jin-Yi]; due to the fact that the characters own up to and are forthright about their faults; the shortcomings explored and fundamental questions about their relationships - past & present. This is not your standard kdrama filled with only goody two-shoe characters in relationships.

Too bad the ratings for DOR aren't higher. I was hoping that at some point during the course of its run Discovery of Romance would beat Night Watchman at least once in the ratings race.

I sure hope the single digit ratings don't negatively impact Eric Mun's chances of being recruited for and offered the lead male role in future dramas projects by the Korean networks.

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Joanna

October 1, 2014 at 1:45 PM

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Phi

October 1, 2014 at 5:17 PM

actually a lot of dramas end up in single digit rating. The Wed-Thu time slot as well. I think being smacked between 2 sageuks (a makjang before Secret Door started) in the Mon-Tue time slot, DoR rating is doing ok? I was worried it'd be even lower.

It'd be nice if higher rating, but I'm not worry :D

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20 August

October 1, 2014 at 1:24 PM

Will the day ever come in kdramaland...
Where the standard is to show a character dealing with heartbreak, emotional pain, setbacks, depression, stress, and/or any type of letdown in life without resorting to constantly drinking oneself into a stupor?

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nomad

October 1, 2014 at 3:19 PM

Sadly enough I haven't seen the light at the end of the tunnel for what you're saying…I wonder about it too. It's like pretty much all dramas I've seen don't have characters who know how to channel their energy positively. They'd rather be…numbed.

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21 Chandler

October 1, 2014 at 5:13 PM

I had shied away from watching this drama for a while because, after getting behind on it because of work, I read some of the comments on it and feared that I would end up feeling about it the way I feel about the I Need Romance dramas. However, I'm all caught up now and...I'm actually really liking it! Like a lot. So I'm happy! YAY. Because if there was going to be a drama from this writer that I actually really, fully enjoy, I'd want it to be the one with Eric and Jung Yumi :) And all the awesome side-characters as well!

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22 samsooki

October 1, 2014 at 6:06 PM

Why I Like This Drama.

1. I like Han Yeo Reum. I like the fact that she is honest with herself.

2. I like Kang Tae Ha. I like the fact that he is honest with himself too.

3. I like the OTP because their actions, apart or separate, are honest.

4. Yoon Sol is cute and funny.

People I Think Are Tools.

1. Nam Ha Jin. He is a wrench. He treats his GF like a possession. He treats his friend DJH as a possession. He is childish and unworthy of anyone with a brain.

2. Do Joon Ho. He is a beltsander. He has no balls and he has no integrity. There I said it.

3. Eun Gyu. He is a four-in-one tool. He is a coward, he is selfish, he is least likely to succeed, he has no consistency.

Whatever negative things people say about Han YeoReum, just know this. Han Yeo Reum follows her heart. She broke up with KTH when she needed to. And then she went eith NHJ because she wanted to. If she is being swayed by KTH now, good for her. Be true to yourself.

If more people did that more, rather than try to act in ways that they think others approve, then we would have a hell of a lot less hypocrisy in the world.

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Kandiboo

October 1, 2014 at 10:51 PM

You know if Ha Jin trusted Yeo Reum just a bit more instead of doubting her love and every move then I believe that the end result will be different. Although YR was wary of AR/HJ (I feel that) she has mostly trusted him and when she didn't she confronted them head-on.

Eun-Gyu - I can't believe you are still mentioning him. He's so not worthy of a mention here.

You also forgot about Dir Yoon. Where's my seaweed feeder breakfast cooker house cleaner best buddy all in one package?

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Selina

October 2, 2014 at 5:51 AM

I agree with this. I was surprised that in the end YR and HJ's breakup (although it factored) had nothing to do with TH and YR's renewed feelings for him and everything to do with YR's feelings where it concerns her future happiness with HJ. Although it wasn't the kind of happiness I wanted for her YR despite her feelings for TH that may never change, YR could see herself happy with HJ so she was willing to stay and marry him and live that happy life. It wasn't till the car confrontation in ep 14 where ultimatums,distrust, and demands, are made by HJ that would leave YR no longer happy, that she decides to end things. The happy life she imagined she could have with HJ was no longer true for her so she ended things. This tells me that if YR goes back to TH in the end it won't be simply because of feelings but because she honestly chooses him and the happy future she imagines they could have together. While most viewers think YR is thinking in the past, I feel she is very much about the present and future.

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Spi

October 2, 2014 at 2:04 PM

Oh wow I wrote something totally opposite and now I read your comment and everything just falls into places and makes sense. Now I understand the car confrontation scene so much more.

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samsooki

October 2, 2014 at 7:06 AM

omg kandiboo, you are totally right, i messed up. DO OVER!

Why I Like This Drama.

1. I like Han Yeo Reum. I like the fact that she is honest with herself.

2. I like Kang Tae Ha. I like the fact that he is honest with himself too.

3. I like the OTP because their actions, apart or separate, are honest.

4. Yoon Sol is cute and funny.

5. Chief Yoon rocks the apron, the spatula, the chopsicks, the mike, the books and whatever else he touches. Plus I love his tortoise rim glasses. So stylish.

People I Think Are Tools.

1. Nam Ha Jin. He is a wrench. He treats his GF like a possession. He treats his friend DJH as a possession. He is childish and unworthy of anyone with a brain.

2. Do Joon Ho. He is a beltsander. He has no balls and he has no integrity. There I said it.

3. Eun Gyu. He is a four-in-one tool. He is a coward, he is selfish, he is least likely to succeed, he has no consistency.

If more people did that more, rather than try to act in ways that they think others approve, then we would have a hell of a lot less hypocrisy in the world.

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Kandiboo

October 2, 2014 at 8:30 AM

@samsooki thank you. not all ajusshis look good in those specs... and you know you probably will NEVER rock those tortoise rim glasses, like Chief/Hyung, right?! i'd also like to see you put on the apron, cook doenjang jjigae and feed your other half kimbap XD kekekekeke

although it's really funny, normally people look really dorky and downright ugly with tortoise specs/bigar&e lens-less glasses that cover 1/3 of the face, but somehow Koreans make them look good.

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crashbabe

October 1, 2014 at 10:54 PM

Oh I soooo agree with you Samsooki...I have been reading the comments and think to myself, geeesh then I am a terrible person in these people's eyes too cos I think that there is no right or wrong when it comes to love. You feel what you feel and sometimes, well most times, your head has no say.

I like that she finally faces her feelings head on as when she was talking to Sol. She probably thinks she can rationalise and control her heart.

Yes. She should've told HJ about TH and HJ has every right to be upset and disappointed by YR, but we've all made mistakes before, thinking it's better not to say something so as not to rock a relationship - our own or our friends sometimes. What can I say. love is complicated.

I think exploring this very tight tightrope she puts herself onto is immensely interesting to me. At least, she ain't no candy and I have met real people in the same situation as YR. That is why i dig this show.

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ladi

October 2, 2014 at 3:32 AM

But she was a hypocrite accepting HJ's ring while she knew she had feelings for TH.
No I agree to disagree with you here.
Nowadays, when a character isn't perfect, people are quick to say 'Great, they are being realistic, we need more kdrama chars like this'

True, people are not perfect like the stereotypical kdrama chars are, but the unvarnished truth is Yeo Reum is a BITCH.

I would hate her character in real life as much as I do in the drama.
Its ready to defend her and say she didn't go looking for work with TH, true but when she saw she started developing feelings for him, she should have either cut it off,or told HJ.
How can HJ be the bad guy here and not YR? Simply bias

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Sharon

October 2, 2014 at 3:52 AM

YR accepted that ring because she knows her position. She knows how much HJ loves her and doesn't wanna hurt him. She mentioned in this episode though to Sol.

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Phi

October 2, 2014 at 10:12 AM

inmo, she accepted that ring probably trying to make that relationship work. There, she's exercising her will power over her emotions. Which was the opposite of when she broke up with Taeha back then, when it was her emotion over her will.

Hajin is a good person but YR-HJ isn't a good match.

Till EP.14, even though I ship YR-TH, I was ok with YR-HJ ending too because they both willing to try and it could work. Then in EP.14 it becomes obvious it's no longer healthy to force it to work any more when the basic of a relationship (mutual love & trust are not there or not the same any more).

Hajin is a good person but YR-HJ are not perfect for each other and they know it. Yeoreum frustrates me at time (just like the others during the course of the drama) but I don't think she's a bitch or an immoral person.

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samsooki

October 2, 2014 at 1:22 PM

What makes you think HJ is a good person?

Let's see what NHJ has done.

10 REASONS WHY NHJ IS A BAD PERSON.

1. Lied to his gf multiple times about AAR. Not to protect the relationship, not to protect his gf's feelings. No, he lied because his mom told him to cover up the fact that he was adopted and therefore he couldn't explain AAR to his gf. To NHJ, protecting his mom's secret anxiety over stupid status or whatever from his gf was more important than telling the truth to the one he loves.

2. Physically punished his gf because... well, because he was mad. Yes, there were reasons, and later, when he decides to slap her around a little, I'm sure there will always be reasons. For people who express their emotions and anger through violence and pain, there is ALWAYS a justification. I had to use the belt because she wasn't listening to me. I just had to get her to see my side, and so I hit her just a few times with the belt...

3. Verbally abusive to his gf because, again, he was mad! Verbal abuse is much nicer than physical abuse, right? Because NHJ can constantly yell at his gf without anyone else knowing - those scars are on the inside, away from view.

4. Was constantly snooping, stalking and trying to track down his gf. What's the reason here? Jealousy? Inferiority complex? Alpha male losing alpha-maleness? What's with the GPS tracker on her phone?

5. Treated his gf like a possession, never ever asking her what she wanted, never thinking about what was best for her because obviously, HE is the best for her because he's so awesome. He can do what he wants, because he's rich and he can just loan his gf the money for the wedding. Then she's going to be indebted to him for life. Yay!

6. Treated his "best" friend like a possession too, ordering around his "hyung" and never actually thinking about what his friend might be going through or what is important to his friend. Feeling bad? Screw that, come here so I can brood and guilt you into doing my bidding.

7. Physically assaults other people. Why? Again, because he's mad. Yes, that's a great reason to commit felony battery. But, but but.... I was angry! He made me feel bad! He said I wasn't good for my gf! He said that he "may or may not" like my gf! That's why I fly off the handle to commit battery because I get upset when my manhood is challenged!

8. Lied to his long lost "sister" because he felt guilty and didn't want to fess up. Nice. Yes, because you spent your whole adult life looking for her, and now that you found her, and her life is not as awesome as yours, you have to protect your own possessions and so you lie. Over and over again.

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samsooki

October 2, 2014 at 1:24 PM

[continued]

9. Even though he JUST found his long lost sister after more than a DECADE, almost TWO DECADES of being out of touch, after a few weeks of her having run-ins with his gf and the possibility of a future run-in with his mom (the one who decided to adopt her but then changed her mind), HJ tries to ship AAR out of the country by giving her the money to leave Korea. And don't come back, but you can email me status updates. Thanks.

10. Love means that you wish happiness for your love. At this point, NHJ could give two shits about whether HYR is better off or will be happier with him. IN FACT, the thing that MOST upsets NHJ is the fact that it is getting more and more clear that KTH did make HYR happy and so that's why HYR is upset and crying all the time. How does NHJ react? By yelling at his gf, and trying to beat up the ex-bf. That's not love at all. That's selfishness and greed.

Nothing NHJ has ever done in this whole drama indicates that he is a good person.

Even doing the free surgery for the orphan boy and for AAR wasn't free - it was because NHJ felt guilty and didn't want to feel like he owed anybody. So he's buying out his guilt by helping AAR and the orphanage. Man of the Year?

Not even close.

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Joanna

October 2, 2014 at 3:09 PM

And this: "you will quit your job because I say so." Nope, nope, nope.

samsooki

October 2, 2014 at 3:47 PM

Yeah, exactly, that's part of the whole YOU ARE MY POSSESSION mentality so that NHJ gets to tell HYR what to do and where to go.

No, fuck that. Seriously, go eff yourself.

***

By the by, NHJ is like EXACTLY OPPOSITE of the character that Sung Joon played in INR3. THAT INR3 character would have told HYR to flee in THIS drama.

Sharon

October 2, 2014 at 6:18 AM

Agree with you. Team Kang tae Ha…XD

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23 Sandra

October 1, 2014 at 6:11 PM

Admit it or not, Kang Tae Ha isn't Yeo Reum's past. She never stop loving him. That's the real problem in here. Just take a look from episode 1, when she drunk and get wet in TH's bath room, she didn't do anything when TH was helping her to wipe her wet hair. And when she end up on his bed, I didn't see she became angry or slap TH's face for doing that. So, I never believe she hated him at all. She felt disappointed badly over the years for the reality of his bad attitudes. So, when TH apologized for his mistakes sincerely and comforting her for her father's suicide, the disappointment all gone and make her 'undying love' becoming stronger that HJ's nice personality can't handle it anymore. After watching episode 14, there is a scene where she admit she wants to spend time in TH's birthday after they broke up whenever she see on calender his birthday is coming. As she said to Sol, you can't handle your feeling, whether he's good or bad you just love him, no matter what. Now, they're absolutely scheating emotionally, that's not good for any of their partner. Hj also realized it saying that seeing them together (in Nami Island) is worst than seeing two of them kissing. The feeling just can't lie no matter how hard you try to deny it.

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24 peaches

October 1, 2014 at 6:33 PM

i feel like the reason why so many people are hating on yeoreum and this show is because she is uncomfortably human and flawed. people expect to see the usual, pure and innocent heroine waffling between the two handsome male leads, equally as perfect and faultless in character. they're disturbed by how she can be swayed by her ex when she's in a romantic relationship and how she's capable of manipulation and lying, etc. yes, this is still a tv show and still unrealistic, but the characters are actually quite human in their flaws.
obviously, ha jin and yeoreum's fallout could have been prevented if only she'd told him the truth about her and tae ha's past relationship sooner, but helloooo everyone seems to be forgetting that that's already been explained ages ago- she chose not to tell him because they took on the job for money, and there was that sequence where her and sol imagined ha jin throwing a jealous tantrum on the bed, so they both agreed not to tell him, because it would be pointless. she had no romantic feelings for him at that point and no inclination to get back together, and their relationship was supposed to last only during the course of the job so she figured it wasn't worth fighting about with ha jin. but then, she was trapped because it would seem suspicious if she came out about it later, so she couldn't tell him. even if it's frustrating, it's understandable and it's been explained.
people should just stop commenting if they're just going to leave consistently negative comments and say that they wish it was about sol instead, every single damn time.

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corgi

October 1, 2014 at 8:07 PM

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gustave154

October 2, 2014 at 1:11 AM

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Phi

October 2, 2014 at 3:06 AM

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Suwan

October 2, 2014 at 6:47 AM

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25 selina

October 1, 2014 at 8:10 PM

Can your heart betray someone, even if your actions have been faithful?

This is the question isn't it. But it's not being faithful when you're emotionally cheating which Yeo Reum has been doing for a while now.

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26 travelcrazy

October 1, 2014 at 10:11 PM

My advise to YR: get married, have kids, and be done with all this dilema. But then, we all won't have a drama ...

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gustave154

October 2, 2014 at 1:11 AM

shes gonna regret not having Tae-Ha for the rest of her life though...

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27 Jojo

October 2, 2014 at 2:18 AM

I think the characters and scenerio in the show is rather realistic. When it comes to the matter of heart, who can say who is right or wrong. Esp when our leading couples are not married, I think they still have the right to think and choose. Let's hope we can get a satisfactory ending....

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28 Sharon

October 2, 2014 at 2:37 AM

Sorry, but really I don't understand why many said YR should choose HJ if she wanna has stable and secure in relationship. After watching 14 episodes, I don't find him as a stable or secure person. He has emotional, anxious and trust issue. And it leads him to be a possessive and scary partner. In the earlier episodes, he showed always suspicious and tracking her by GPS. But the problem is, he doesn't wanna ask YR directly to avoid fighting and possibility of break up. This guy has serious issue. We just don't see the real problem come out. But after AR and TH problems came out, we could see the true color of him. I couldn't accept how he shouting at YR several times, such as in front of TH and AR (the two strangers in their relationship) or punched TH in billiard game suddenly (even though I know exactly how TH provoke him first, but still his reaction is too much). I'm worry if YR marry him, he'll be a possessive husband that could clinging, always suspicious and hurting her without realize it.

Actually I saw his personality with some k-drama's roles before. Such as the female lead's fiancee in Winter Sonata. They actually nice person, but love makes them blind, possessive and indirectly hurting the one that they supposed to protect.

And I kinda agree that YR is keeping her love for TH all these years (without she realized it) after watching episode 14…upppss…spoiler…XD

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Spi

October 2, 2014 at 2:13 PM

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29 JMK

October 2, 2014 at 7:49 AM

My head is spinning trying to keep straight the characters here, versus Secret Hotel. Two dramas, both with a heroine torn between two men....her current man, and her past man. Both dramas complete with cute and funny 2nd leads. Both dramas with the past beau experiencing a realization and rebirth. I've had to shake my head constantly to remember....who knows about who...oh wait he knows about the ex....no wait that's the other show....he's learned his lessons....no wait, that's the other guy........he knows because she told him.....no, he knows because he found the box......aaaaaaiiiiisssssshhhhhh......

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JMK

October 2, 2014 at 7:59 AM

Also.....both dramas with the past beau surrounded by quirky/funny/supportive co-workers. Both dramas with the current beau still hiding something from the heroine. To top it off SH has the murder mystery suspects to add to the confusion. It's maddening.

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