Thousand Day Promise: Episode 19

64 December 19, 2011January 24, 2016

by girlfriday

What do you mean you didn’t want your heart broken into a million pieces? There’s no backing out now, not this close to the end. As we prepare for the finale, the worst of it hits like a ton of bricks, with no mercy for Seo-yeon or for the people who love her. We’ve been dancing around it for most of the drama, but the breakdown finally happens, and boy is it heart-wrenching, as promised.

EPISODE 19 RECAP

Ji-hyung narrates that Seo-yeon had the baby, and cried silently all the way home, while looking at her little face. She has since “dipped her two feet into depression, then back out again,” describing the number of mood changes she goes through on a regular basis. Seven months have passed that way.

They hired a nanny, but Seo-yeon hated having someone else around her, and so they went though another, and another, until finally Ji-hyung had to cut his workday in half and spend more time at home. He says that Seo-yeon doesn’t seem very interested in the baby that she had so fiercely wanted to have, often looking at her with a far-off gaze.

“That my wife is taking one step away from us every day, is something that I know. The woman I love told me as she laid her head in my lap last night, that she is terrified of the day when she cannot recognize me or her brother. She asked what it is not to know yourself.”

He says all this as he leaves the office… and meets Hyang-gi? What the hell, dude? At least it’s clear from the awkward greetings and small talk that they haven’t seen each other in the interim. She mentions having seen his baby when she would stop by to visit his parents. He hems and haws for a bit, and then comes out with it…

He tells her that Seo-yeon has asked to meet her. He knows it’s crazy to ask, and he thought she’d let it go, but lately she’s been relentless about it. Taken aback, Hyang-gi admits that she did wish to meet Seo-yeon just once, even catch a glimpse of her from far away, to satisfy her curiosity and know what she was like, why he did what he did. That kind of breaks my heart.

But she says that’s not the case anymore. Oh, I’m so happy for you that you’re over him. He knows it’s way too much to ask, but pleads with her to consider it anyway. “I want to do anything I can to give Seo-yeon what she wants. Other than sit by and watch, there is nothing I can do.” Oof. That twists me up inside. And he looks wrecked as he says it too, just desperate to have some agency against this tidal wave that’s been beating him down for months.

He says it again, that he knows it’s crazy to ask this of her, but Hyang-gi good-naturedly tells him it’s okay, and that she has no ill will towards him. When it happened it hurt like hell, but now it’s in the past, and she’s got her parents’ love and her health, and she’s wont for nothing in this world. She is almost impossibly plucky. I’m proud of her though, for coming out on the other side of her heartbreak as a better person.

At home, Aunt shows Seo-yeon the new hanbok she’s wearing to a relative’s wedding today, and Ji-hyung’s mom arrives to take over baby/Seo-yeon duty in her place. Mom takes the baby up in her arms and attempts to turn her over to Seo-yeon, but she freezes.

Mom tells Seo-yeon that she won’t drop the baby, that the baby won’t break, that it’s okay to hold her. Augh, what a terrible fear to carry—that you’ll drop your own child in a moment’s mental lapse. She seems so terrified that she’s basically shut herself off from the baby altogether.

Myung-hee calls Aunt to pick her up for the wedding, and asks after Seo-yeon. She says to her husband afterwards that watching the once smart and strong-willed Seo-yeon lose her mind makes her feel… Her husband finishes the sentence: “Sorry? Do you know you should feel sorry?” Hahahaha. The way she looks up at him shows that she does know.

Mom tells Seo-yeon about a family trip planned to go see the flowers in bloom, and Seo-yeon answers everything with a far-off look in her eyes, like she’s just repeating words but not taking them in. Mom’s heart sinks in disappointment every time Seo-yeon answers her.

The house is covered with memos, naming people, labeling items and what they’re for. That alone tells us that Seo-yeon has passed a certain point in her daily functionality. Over dinner, Mom asks Ji-hyung if there’s something else they should be doing, something they missed to treat her illness and slow it down.

But Ji-hyung tells her that Seo-yeon’s accepted the things she cannot change about what’s to come. She reads about Alzheimer’s daily, preparing herself, often reading aloud to him to prepare him too.

While he steps out to see Mom off, the baby starts to cry, and Seo-yeon runs over to the crib in a panic, not knowing what to do. She stands there frozen, until Moon-kwon comes running in to hold the baby and stop her tears. He asks why she’s crying, and Seo-yeon answers, “I don’t know,” in this way like she feels like she ought to know the answer and hates that she doesn’t.

He asks Seo-yeon to take her and feed her, and she backs away. He urges her that nothing will happen; that she won’t drop her. But Seo-yeon fires back that she can’t – what if she drops her? Kills her? Imagines her as a monster and stomps on her?

Moon-kwon says that makes no sense, but Seo-yeon shouts back, “I make no sense!” Gah, this is crushing. She’s basically all first parents’ fears magnified a thousand times, so much that she can’t bring herself to hold the baby once, for fear that she’ll snap and lose her mind for just that one millisecond.

She turns to walk out of the room, and finds that Ji-hyung has overheard. She complains that Moon-kwon is belittling her, and he just holds her close and calms her down. She tells him that she thinks they should send the baby to his mother.

Seo-yeon: I feel like I’m trapped in a glass box that’s so dirty I can’t see out of it. Or like the sun has set and I’m in darkness, like a cloud of fog so thick that I can’t see ten meters in front of me. You know how much I like things to be clear, defined. How much I tried to keep it so. I packaged my inferiority as pride, and tried to stay awake, so as not to be detected. Before, the world, and my thoughts were cruelly clear. But now so many things have become ill-defined. I’ve lost confidence in everything. I’ve become dull, clothed in layers of tattered rags, like a giant mound of snow. I have confidence in nothing. More importantly, I can’t trust myself.

She cries sorrowfully, and then in a moment, forgets what she said. Ji-hyung reminds her, and she reiterates that she doesn’t want to have the baby here while she’s crapping herself. Ji-hyung reminds her that they are her father and her mother, and that it doesn’t matter. But she insists, and so he says he’ll bring it up with Mom.

In the middle of the night, Seo-yeon paces back and forth reciting another poem, and then suddenly walks out to the balcony. She takes off her slippers, steps up onto a stool, and peers over the edge, contemplating ending it all. Oh god oh god oh god…

She leans over the edge for a long moment, and then falls back with a cry. Oh phew. I think my heart just lurched out of my chest. She heads back inside, choosing to write than to end it all.

But Moon-kwon wakes up a little while later, and sees the scene she’s left behind – the open door, the stool, the slippers. He stares dumbfounded at first, and then runs to Ji-hyung’s door. He hesitates, like he doesn’t want to face it, but then starts calling for him, tears streaming down his face.

Ji-hyung stirs awake, with Seo-yeon sleeping soundly next to him. Moon-kwon tells him that Noona jumped, and Ji-hyung asks if he had a nightmare, ’cause Seo-yeon’s sleeping in bed. Moon-kwon doesn’t believe him at first, and runs inside to see for himself.

Ji-hyung wonders what he’s so upset about, and then sees the evidence on the balcony, stricken to see what must’ve passed through her mind, what almost happened, all while he was sleeping.

He tells Moon-kwon that they’ll clear all things out of the balcony, and Moon-kwon nods, sniffling back his tears.

In the morning, workers are there, putting up a metal railing to cage in the whole balcony. Seo-yeon complains to Ji-hyung that they’re locking her up, and he tries to deflect that it’s to keep them safe from burglars. But she tells him not to treat her like an idiot, and that she knows it’s because of her.

He sighs and tells her that she’s right, and that last night she stepped up onto a stool to consider jumping over the ledge. That sends her spinning in shock. She says she’s sorry, that she doesn’t remember.

He tells her that he knows what she was thinking, but that she can’t ever do it. He pleads with her to stop thinking that it’s what’s best for him, and that what he wants is to sit here like this, look her in the eye, and talk to her, and be with her.

She just repeats that she’s sorry, and he tells her to stop. Ji-hyung: “Because I’m you, and you’re me. We’re one person. Sorry is what you say to another, not yourself.” She says that she hates herself, that she wants to disappear.

But he pleads with her that she can’t: “If you disappear, I disappear.” She says they shouldn’t have married, that she thought they’d be happy. In tears, he says, “We are happy.”

Seo-yeon: “They say I’ve become an empty house with no owner.” Ji-hyung: “To me you’re still my wife and Yeh-eun-ie’s mother. Don’t run away from me.” He kisses her hands, repeating that he loves her.

Ji-hyung and Hyang-gi’s parents are on happy well-adjusted terms, the dads cooing over pictures of the granddaughter, and the moms back to their usual banter. Hyang-gi’s mom has had it up to here with Hyang-gi’s excuses for all the blind dates that she’s rejected – he’s too tall, too thin, too fat, too bald, too hairy, etc. She swears that Ji-hyung has ruined her, because now she’s just searching for another guy like him, and where do they have those lying around?

I know a guy. His name is Oppa, and I miss him sorely. I’ll even consider giving you to Hyang-gi if you show your face around here, Oppa!

Hyang-gi heads out to meet with Seo-yeon, and both women prepare for the meeting full of nerves, Seo-yeon fretting over what to wear and wanting to be as alert as possible. Ji-hyung asks Moon-kwon to watch his niece for a while, and he has this spastic burst of adorableness, flapping like a chicken at the baby. She just stares at him like, what’s this wacko doing? Heh.

Hyang-gi arrives, and it’s a tense beginning, mostly because I’m on pins and needles about Seo-yeon keeping it together in front of her. But she manages to be composed and clear.

She pauses as she searches for a way to begin, and Ji-hyung comes to her side, handing her the notes she wrote down earlier, the things she wanted to say to Hyang-gi. But she smiles and says she doesn’t need them, and thanks him anyway. Hyang-gi looks at Ji-hyung with this sudden realization, like watching his love for Seo-yeon in action feels so different from just knowing of it.

Seo-yeon wonders how much she must’ve hurt, and Hyang-gi says it was like being struck by lightning, but that it took that strike to make her realize that Ji-hyung never loved her. She calls him oppa still, and Seo-yeon responds calling him oppa too, and then laughs at herself for parroting her. And then she turns to Ji-hyung, “Oppa.” It’s adorable.

Once Ji-hyung leaves the room, she starts to say what I feared she’d say – that she’s not long for this world, and that if Hyang-gi still had feelings for Ji-hyung, that perhaps she could be by his side, that maybe she knows him better than anyone. Dude, I get why, but that’s just… WRONG.

She knows she shouldn’t ask it, but it’s like she can’t handle the guilt of what she’s doing to him. But as she says it, her head starts to ache, and she struggles to hold it together. Suddenly she clutches her head in agony, “I’m sorry, my head is shattering.”

Hyang-gi calls out for Ji-hyung and he rushes to her side with pills. He holds her close as she cries, shaking. “What do I do? I’m so pathetic and low. It makes no sense. What do I do? What do I do?” She bawls into his chest, as he tells her it’s okay.

Crying uncontrollably, she says to Hyang-gi: “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I ruined it all. I’m sorry.” Hyang-gi kneels by her side, assuring her that she’s not unhappy, and that it’s okay. “Please don’t cry, unni.” Aw.

Ji-hyung walks her out and apologizes, thanking her for coming by to meet Seo-yeon. Hyang-gi tells him it’s okay, and that it just hurts to see her in such pain. She asks him to tell Seo-yeon that she was glad to meet her, and that it’s a given that Ji-hyung loves her so.

Aunt is nursing a cold at home, and Jae-min finally shows his face in this episode to bring her medicine and tuck her in like the perfect son that he is. She says that Seo-yeon has a visitor and wonders if it’s the youngest of her co-workers, the nice one that Seo-yeon likes. She muses that maybe she’d be good enough in Seo-yeon’s eyes for Oppa to marry, and Jae-min just smiles and dismisses it.

Aunt confesses that perhaps Seo-yeon shouldn’t have had the baby, because she won’t even feed her, or hold her just once. She sighs that the universe should’ve taken her instead, a tear rolling down her cheek.

Moon-kwon puts the baby down and checks on Seo-yeon, and hears the bath running. He calls after her but she won’t answer, so he opens the door, to find her sitting in the overflowing tub, fully clothed and staring off into space.

He runs to stop the water and tries to get her out, and she shrinks back, yelling at him not to touch her. She storms out of the bath, trailing water everywhere, and then plops down in the bed sopping wet, on top of all the clothes she had laid out earlier.

Gah, Moon-kwon’s heartbreak is really hard to take. His whole world is crashing, hard and fast. Ji-hyung finds him in tears and calmly puts a hand on his shoulder, and takes care of Seo-yeon. He puts her down for a nap in the living room, and the boys clean up after her.

Moon-kwon asks who the visitor was, and Ji-hyung tells him about Seo-yeon wanting to apologize to Hyang-gi. Moon-kwon reassures himself by saying that she must’ve overstressed herself, trying so hard to stay alert.

Jae-min comes by and Moon-kwon tells him about what happened, and he finds Ji-hyung just about teetering on the brink. He holds it together long enough to get to his office, and then buries his head in his hands, crumbling under the weight of it all. Jae-min comes up behind him and silently puts a hand on his shoulder, and Ji-hyung breaks down and cries.

Outside, Seo-yeon wakes up and goes to the kitchen. She reads the series of memos on the refrigerator, and finds that the lunch menu is curry, so she dutifully takes the rice and curry out of the fridge.

She unwraps them, and then pours the curry over the rice, letting it overflow. And then without cooking it, she dips her hand in the bowl and begins to shovel it into her mouth, over and over again.

COMMENTS

Oh man, we all knew it was coming, but watching her break down is harder to take than I thought. That final scene – that shot of her picture when she was, as she says, still Lee Seo-yeon, and then her blank expression as she eats cold curry with her hands – just guts me. It kills me that it’s finally happened – her turning stupid, as she so feared. And to Seo-yeon, she’s as good as dead if she’s lost her mind.

It’s only in these last few episodes that I’ve finally come to understand why Kim Rae-won was cast, because the focus has now shifted so that we’re more emotionally grounded with him than with Seo-yeon. She’s still the source of our collective heartbreak, but he’s the one we cry with, that we feel empathy for when he holds her desperately and tells her it’s going to be okay when he knows it’s not. The way he handles her and Moon-kwon with calm and resolve is such a quiet heroism. He felt so listless in the beginning, so it’s nice to see that he has an arc of his own, and a chance to be the hero of the story, if he’s the only one left to tell it.

Park Yoo-hwan has successfully made me cry more than anyone else in this drama with his noona-love. Seeing her breakdown in the eyes of the one who looks up to her the most is unbelievably crushing. And of course, Su Ae continues to carry the whole show on her amazing shoulders. She’s un-fucking-real.

Is it stating the obvious to say ‘Prepare the tissues’ for tomorrow’s finale? I went ahead and bought the jumbo pack. Bring it on, Show. I’m armed with 3-ply.

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1 Asama

December 19, 2011 at 6:16 PM

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAa

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2 gg

December 19, 2011 at 6:29 PM

omg noooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!! T___________T

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3 Ora

December 19, 2011 at 6:32 PM

Sounds like a good show to watch for the holidays. I mean good as in stylistically and story wise, not good as in happy.

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4 geWi

December 19, 2011 at 6:38 PM

i'm just reading the recaps for this drama, i'm not sure if i can take watching it.. its so friggin sad!

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5 Cynthia

December 19, 2011 at 6:47 PM

Watched this ep earlier - Show is doing a real nice job in ripping our guts out. Sympathy all around for pretty much every character in this drama.

One thing about watching this in HD - it's scary to see how exhausted they all look. This is such a reflection of real life -the primary victim of the disease spirals down, bringing the caregiver(s) along for the dreadful ride. No one escapes.

Well, one way or another, it ends tomorrow.

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Cynthia

December 20, 2011 at 12:09 PM

Just watched the finale. I hope that by the time the final recap is out later today, I'll be coherent enough to leave a comment. Now I'm just going through Kleenex. Lots.

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6 Little One

December 19, 2011 at 6:48 PM

NOOO!!!!!!!! So sad!

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7 Venus

December 19, 2011 at 6:50 PM

Just reading this got me in tears and feeling like my heart is breaking.....wow such a powerful episodes specially when she refuses to hold her baby.....

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8 Momo-jun

December 19, 2011 at 6:51 PM

Oh My Goodness... I didnt think this show could break my heart anymore but between Su Ae, and Yoohwan I am a puddle of tears over here! Rae-Won is really shining through as well. I'm usually not a melo fan but this one has had me in for the long haul. I'm with your girlfriday! I've got my box of tissues armed and ready!

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djinni

December 20, 2011 at 5:21 AM

tissues and gatoraid... we need to stay hydrated after all the crying.

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9 mojaslatka

December 19, 2011 at 7:04 PM

Honestly, this is the first episode recap I read(and I didn't watch it). Man, I was bawling like a baby. And I'm in the office. People starts wondering what's happening with me. But don't care. I promised to marathon read this tonight( since I can't stream videos because of limited very slow connection).

I hope I'll finish it tonight in time for tomorrow finale.

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10 lovin it

December 19, 2011 at 7:05 PM

all teared out.
thank god this is ending tomorrow.
taking a toll on me!

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11 minhe

December 19, 2011 at 7:36 PM

thank you so much for the awesome recap :)

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12 Biscuit

December 19, 2011 at 7:38 PM

The sad thing? Like Seo-Yeon stated, this isn't like the dramas where someone dies. She basically is crippling within, but she's alive and not dying.

The heartbreak the family goes through and sacrifices for her sake everyday.... *tear*.

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13 Midori

December 19, 2011 at 7:49 PM

Didn't recognize Park Yoo-hwan till now. He's amazing! Everyone's so freaking unbelievably good in this drama. It's probably sweeping all the acting awards.

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gala

December 19, 2011 at 11:37 PM

same here... i'm kinda shocked actually. i've seen him (but didnt talk to him) in person at Yoochun's gelato shop. he had a different aura compared to nowadays. like he became...younger in attitude and demeanour. in fact i didnt like him before cause he projected a wee bit arrogance compared to YC. but he seems different now.

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Gandalf

December 20, 2011 at 5:29 AM

Both he and Yoochun had a hard time growing up though
I cannot forget this

:'(
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ZNhqqZRUx4

and those experiences are what yoohwan draws from

"The crying scene that took great pains to veil in “A Thousand Days’ Promise” where Yoohwan bawled and tightly held the hand of his sister whom refused treatment, received high praise from critics. Yoohwan’s unique emotional acting came from the “painful memories of childhood”, “after hyung debuted, he returned to the States occasionally, I looked at hyung as he slept and as I thought of how he would leave me again, I couldn’t help but keep crying. Remembering those days, even till now, I still feel sad.” He said, “the feelings towards noona in the drama and my feelings towards hyung is similar,” “I injected my feelings by imagining hyung as an Alzheimer’s patient.”

This is from an interview

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14 ar

December 19, 2011 at 8:02 PM

thanks for the recap, girlfriday! Su-Ae being "un-fucking-real" is right! While all the actors are giving the drama their 110% and are knocking their roles out of the park, Su-Ae really does carry this drama. I'm also starting to get why Kim Rae Won was cast. In the beginning, I felt he was a bit wasted since he didn't really get to do much. Watching him break down and cry here after trying to remain optimistic and be the pillar for the whole family-- it was heartbreaking.

I have never really been that attracted to Kim Rae Won...but watching him the baby makes me want to have his babies. Damn biological clock!

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15 funnibee

December 19, 2011 at 8:23 PM

Oh my goodness! So SAD T_T

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16 crazedlu

December 19, 2011 at 8:28 PM

my. heart. is. breaking. times. ten.

need. to. breathe.

we'll see how tomorrow goes.

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17 cv

December 19, 2011 at 8:33 PM

*sniff*

Thanks for the wonderful recap. Just so sad...sad..sad..

(sigh) this is why i read recaps and not watch the show. Don't want to bawl my eyes out.

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18 Laya

December 19, 2011 at 9:10 PM

;__; Looks like you'll need more tissues at this rate. Gah. /gives you two more jumbo packs.

Thanks for the recap!

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19 olsen

December 19, 2011 at 9:12 PM

Thank you for the recap

It's amazing how you can read their expressions on their faces even from just screencaps.

I'm just awestruck of their talents.

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20 Ani

December 19, 2011 at 9:21 PM

Moonkwon really is the one I cried most for in this drama. His interactions with his noona just kills me. Poor puppy. Add in Aunty's tears and Seoyeon, hell all her loved ones, and I'm pretty much wiped. X(

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21 Lemon

December 19, 2011 at 9:21 PM

Oh fuck. I don't even dare to watch this episode. Reading this recap alone was enough to make me cry..

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22 Combray

December 19, 2011 at 9:29 PM

Did she stop taking medication after the baby was born, or was it too late?

GDI Meredith shouldn't have messed with Derek's Alzheimer's trial, he could've found the cure and saved Seoyeon lol.

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23 ainossd2

December 19, 2011 at 9:44 PM

Yeah, girlfriday, i also have tissues stocked for the finale!

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24 Isabelle

December 19, 2011 at 10:03 PM

Ok how much of this is real?

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25 Cured!

December 19, 2011 at 11:07 PM

I know that the show is fictional, but even so, it pains me less when I hear about advancements in science.

http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/sideshow/super-memory-pill-possibly-alzheimer-cure-could-around-162010613.html

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26 girlatsea

December 19, 2011 at 11:19 PM

ㅠㅠ I'm crying and it's only the recap.

My mom works at a senior living center with a "memory impaired" department and this just breaks my heart because it's so real. One time when I was volunteering, I can across one of the residents eating a color pencil. Half of it was already in her mouth. God, I can't even imagine what would have happened if I hadn't seen her.

Seo-yeon has gotten to the point where you can't keep your eyes of her for one second. The screencap of her eating that uncooked curry... ㅠㅠ

My heart breaks even more for Moon-kwon, Ji-hyung and the baby.

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27 bunny

December 19, 2011 at 11:22 PM

this drama is so depressing...

i'm so glad that flower boy ramen shop plays on the same day so that they could sort of even each other out.

the acting really is fantastic... Su Ae deserves awards.

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28 sm1leitsamy

December 20, 2011 at 12:45 AM

i've only been reading the recaps for this drama, but man... so-yeon scares me... especially that first picture with her looking over the balcony... *shudders*

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29 ck1Oz

December 20, 2011 at 1:02 AM

This is even worse than watching a drama where the hero or heroine has cancer. I've never cried for so many recaps in a row EVER!!

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30 ahjummabunny

December 20, 2011 at 5:24 AM

park jiheon is a crazy man! why did he do that! he should've run for the hills.

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FiloSofia

December 20, 2011 at 6:47 AM

uh yeah....that's what most people would do. That's why this is a drama - because most people are like you and a love like JiHeon's is so rare. However, there are people - lovers and families - who choose to stay with the ones they love despite dementia etc in real life as well. I'm glad that this drama shows how hard it is for the people around the dementia patients and how strong you have to be to endure the patient's breakdown. Those are our everyday heroes. Love is crazy and seeing as how you don't understand why he stayed, clearly you've never been in love.

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korazylady

December 20, 2011 at 7:48 AM

My brother-in-law took care of my sister for ten years when she had a rare debilitating illness that robbed her mentally and physically. We wanted him to put her in a nursing home for his sake, but he couldn't bear it until the end. So yes, there are those rare cases out there of a kind of love that most of us can't fathom (honestly, I couldn't even understand his devotion.) Sadly, he died of cancer not long after her passing, but everyone felt he really died from a broken heart. They were both quite young, also, as my sister was diagnosed in her early 30's.

Several years have passed, and it's been hard watching this. But I have never loved a writer so much for giving such a raw and honest story, or actors so much for their spot on portrayals of what must be very difficult roles for them. For that reason, this will probably remain at the very top of my favorite dramas ever.

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CutieJamaican

December 20, 2011 at 1:09 PM

@FiloSofia...lets play devils advocate.

What do you think he would have done if it were his Cutie Lovable Princess who had gotten sick just before their wedding?

Do you think he would have stayed with her or do you think he would have abandoned her and gone to SeoYoung anyway?

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FiloSofia

December 20, 2011 at 2:10 PM

@CutieJamaican hmmm...I would say that...of course he would NOT have stayed, since he didn't love his Cutie Lovable Princess xD

At first, i thought perhaps he WOULD stay simply because JH's personality has a streak of passivity and I-dont-wanna-be-the-bad-guy to it.... but seeing as something about his love for SY makes him strong enough to actually MAKE decisions instead of letting events just wash over him....I would say he would have ultimately left HG because regardless of whether HG got dementia or not, he never loved her.

Pure speculation: if HG got dementia right before the wedding...it would've definitely made it harder for him to leave. He might have ended up marrying even, out of guilty or pity...but I don't think he could survive years of HG's breakdown....he would've left her a few months in perhaps. I do think that he likes HG a lot (she is really lovable for sure), it's just not the kind of love he shares with SY, which makes all the difference when it comes to a disease that can change the very personality of the person you love.

*sigh* I know some people say you can "fall out of love" in those extreme situations...I happen to be in the camp that thinks that you "can't fall out of love" as much as you were "never really in love." You can like a person a whole lot, enough to marry them and have kids together even. But it takes LOVE - the indefinable thing that makes you "crazy" and that most people never experience in their lifetime - to stick with a someone suffering from a mental illness till the very end. I don't think most people realize how rare "love" actually is until they're put in a situation where you have the "loved one" in one hand and life as you know it in the other. That's when most people realize that given that situation, whoever they THOUGHT they loved isn't actually the "love of their life" ...that in truth, the one they love most is...themselves.

*whew* what a long tangent ^^ thanks for the interesting question!

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CutieJamaican

December 20, 2011 at 3:07 PM

@ FiloSofia..if you read my responses re. Episode 18 recaps you will see that I don't think its true love at all. I think Ji Hung is a very weak man and he would have married Cutie Princess had he not learned of his cheating partner's illness. There is evidence in the drama that his marrying SeoYoung was out of guilt for being a dishonorable man. It was self inflicted punishment and a way to regain, to himself his pride and honor as a Korean man.

Now he seems to be yearning for Cutie Lovable and is wondering:

"I didn't know Cutie Lovable could look so fuckable right now in them wicked stiletto heels. Damn...Geeze look at her driving away in her happy yellow car and I am here wallowing in misery. Geesh. Aigoo!

What the fuck did I get myself into? What kind of fucking life is this? And she is not even sexy any more so I can't get any punany and that was the main attraction.

But I'll put on the best face, say I love you a million times to convince myself...she sure as hell doesn't believe me...well I brought my ex who I used to shag into our matrimonial home...that should make her feel really good....well we were having an illicit hot booty affair so she ain't all that...sorry ...I am a man and that's my double standard take it or leave it..

Nursing home? naw, too much guilt....just hurry up and die already. I have suffered enough. I paid my dues. Ancestors, Buddha help!

Poor Ji Hung!

CutieJamaican

December 20, 2011 at 5:21 PM

@ ahjummabunny ...Told ya!

Its self inflicted torture for a heaping helping of forbidden punany side dish. Omo Omo Aigoo!

Is he gettin' and these days? Wifey is now frumpy, dumpy and grumpy and she ain't puttin out. What can a poor guy to do but weep and beg the heavens...please put her out of my misery. Yikes!

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FiloSofia

December 21, 2011 at 10:40 AM

Uh...ok. Well, that's your opinion. I didn't think he was yearning for HG at all. He seemed rather uncomfortable around her in my opinion.

I was hoping that this would develop into a good discussion but you seem a little short on analysis and long on foul language and awkward grammar.

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CutieJamaican

December 21, 2011 at 11:40 AM

@ FiloSofia....if you want to read my extensive and detailed analyses, please go to the comments for Episode 18 recaps. Then we can talk K Drama if you dare.

I don't consider language foul especially among adults. I am sorry if you are offended. It was not my intention.

But I have to ask...how can you be so offended by my foul language play when in the story you are not offended by a woman who sneaked around and had an illicit affair with a man in a committed relationship with another woman? You also unashamedly support her partner in crime who is such a weak man he did not have the guts to end one relationship with one woman before starting another. I find that behavior offensive and this is one of the fundamental reasons I cannot support this couple.

Missing Cutie Princess and realizing his horrendous mistake and stupidity are reasons for his discomfort. If he felt nothing, he would not have stood looking at her retreating car with longing and there would be no reason for discomfort, would there? This is a girl who virtually grew up with him.

To add insult to injury, he brought his ex into the sanctity of the matrimonial home. Only a man with a cheating persona and lack of respect for his wife would do that. I agree with Tina Turner..."what has LOVE got to do with it?" Absolutely nothing.

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CutieJamaican

December 21, 2011 at 12:45 PM

@ FiloSofia...are you up for the challenge?

The PD, Director and writer gave me tons of evidence to support my point of view re.:

Camera work: Dutch angles, close ups, long shots
Set design: mis-en-scene, background colors, wardrobe
Placement of actors on set
Dialogue
Scene cuts sequencing aka editing
Cultural mores of the Korean people

They gave me so much in this drama I did not even have to pay close attention to sound.

With all the ammunition in my arsenal I know I would win but if you are game I am ready.

The holidays are here and there is only one episode to go but I would, as you say love a good analysis/discussion but with evidentiary support.

HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO EVERYONE ANY MAY WE HAVE MANY MORE WONDERFUL K DRAMAS TO CRY, LAUGH AND FIGHT ABOUT IN THE NEW YEAR !!!!!!!

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korazylady

December 21, 2011 at 1:44 PM

Amen.

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korazylady

December 21, 2011 at 1:48 PM

Sorry, that amen was meant for FiloSophia at 30.2.1 There is not point in even arguing.....I should have learned it about 20 of CutieJamaican's comments ago.

CutieJamaican

December 21, 2011 at 3:28 PM

@Korazy Lazy...so why can't I get an amen too. LOL Its the holidays and time for good cheer all around. We can agree to disagree can we not?

31 lakorn

December 20, 2011 at 6:09 AM

Wow cute baby! This is the next to the last episode right? I don't think I can watch the rest only read the recaps. It's too depressing.

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32 Lahlita

December 20, 2011 at 7:27 AM

I haven't been watching this drama because I have physical reactions to stress and grief, but reading your recaps is just as bad (good?). I'm at work and I just cried, and now my colleagues think I'm weird. Which I am. But now they also think I'm unhinged. Which I am.

God, this situation sucks. I'm totally going to cry tomorrow, aren't I?

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33 jomo143

December 20, 2011 at 7:38 AM

I girded my ducts just to read your comments and I learned that ducts can't be girded.

I think one day, I will be able to watch this, and I am grateful you wrote so lovingly about it, but not now.
With this cast, it's too frighteningly real and I don't need another gaping hole in my heart to add to the other three or four that dramas carved in me this year.

I will peek at your final comments, though. Not at work like now!

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34 DB5K

December 20, 2011 at 9:01 AM

Yoohwan is definitely a talented rookie. He was definitely perfectly cast. One thing, however, that makes his acting even more poignant, is that his acting is based on his life experiences. His older brother, Yoochun, was selected as a trainee by SM Entertainment, and left for Korea, leaving Yoohwan alone in Virginia. Yoohwan's parents had divorced, and his mom was struggling to make ends meet and raise Yoohwan while working. It was also especially hard for Yoohwan because of the language barrier. Yoochun said in the past that he never wanted to return to America because of all the hard times he experienced there. Yoochun always talked about how sorry he was to Yoohwan for not being able to take care of him. Yoochun mentioned once how he was able to meet Yoohwan, and on the last day of his visit, he noticed Yoohwan with his back turned, shaking. It turned out Yoohwan was silently crying because it was their last day together. You should have seen Yoochun with tears streaming down his face as he mentioned his little brother during DBSK's acceptance speech for the MKMF daesang. Now that Yoochun has the means to take care of his brother and mother, they live together. In fact, Yoochun probably spoils Yoohwan. I read an article about Yoochun buying Yoohwan any car of his choice. One reason I think Yoochun and Yoohwan are such good actors is because of their sensitive personalities, as well as the hardships they've experienced since the difficulties they've experienced become a source of inspiration for their acting.

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35 CutieJamaican

December 20, 2011 at 9:35 AM

Watched Episode 19 raw and the husband is really suffering and its the first time since watching this drama I am moved to tears. Kleenex please!

Cutie Lovable Princess really lives up to her name. Poor poor Ji Hung. His tortured soul is wallowing in regret and self pity. I actually feel sorry for him . But if you make your bed hard you have to lie in it hard. Who is crying now?

And please, do NOT bring your ex to the matrimonial home under any circumstance. Your wife will be pissed especially when the ex is so bright and pretty and healthy and the wife is already doubting you….she freaked over a mere text message…. now you bring her live and looking hot. Sorry. I can’t like this guy. Grrrr.

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tb

December 22, 2011 at 4:30 AM

It's fun reading CutieJamaican and Korazy Lady's comments. But I have to agree with CutieJamaican here about JiHyung brought HyangGi to his home. It's wrong! And I thought Seoyeon should never have met HyangGi. What's the point? JiHyung shouldn't do that.

I haven't watch the raw yet so I don't know if Jihyung is longing for HyangGi or not. But if he is then it sucks! Just SO WRONG!

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CutieJamaican

December 26, 2011 at 6:12 PM

@ tb.....look at the scene in EP 19 where after the visit to his home he accompanied Cutie Princess to her car. He stood for a while LOOKING at her driving away and turned despondently to return to his apartment of hell.

The camera work and his facial expression tells me that he is now sorry he did not marry Cutie Pie. He is human and if he had married her he would not be so miserable and unhappy... a little bored perhaps but ......!

A good sex partner is not necessarily a good marriage partner and that scene to me illustrates his acknowledgement of his mistake.

He is the cheating type so he could have married Cutie and continue the affair with SY. Notice that she is no longer hot! But Cutie is smoking!

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36 korazylady

December 20, 2011 at 10:39 AM

As soon as I read this comment I knew it was from you, cutiejamaican! So cynical (and I'm guessing young.)

From the recap it seems as if Ji-Hyung awkwardly met with Hyang-Gi because Seo-yeon begged him relentlessly to arrange a meeting between her and Hyang Gi. To me it seems like he'd do anything for Seo-yeon if he thought it would help. And regret and pity? Yes, when you're going through something like that you can feel sorry for yourself. But I think his crying is from the devastation over the fact that his true love is getting so much worse.

Read my comment above - I know undying LOVE and grief and it sure looks a lot like this!

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CutieJamaican

December 20, 2011 at 12:41 PM

@Korazy Lady...sorry wrong guess. I have twin sons in their thirties.

Don't blame me, blame the PD because they are still signaling to me that its not true love. Despite the tears and the heightened emotional trauma, I still see self-inflicted punishment. His poignant goodbye to Cutie Princess was more than tinged with longing and the actor did an excellent job conveying this emotion.

He should have resisted the meeting with the ex regardless of how the wife begged and if he capitulated, they should NOT have met in the matrimonial home. That is a major breach and the wife was terribly hurt. You see, telling someone you love them repeatedly is not as powerful nor as meaningful as taking action to protect the loved one's emotions and kibun......(Korean term for saving face).

The actress also did an excellent job showing the agony and shame she felt when the Cutie ex fiancee and her husband entered the room together, oh so looking like the perfect couple.

How do you think she felt as a sick woman seeing this healthy, pretty young girl next to the man she seduced and "stole" from her? Plus, she is sensing that he is yearning for happy, healthy, cheerful, lovable, Cutie Princess now....all the things she is not. She is sorry, but its too late.

That's why she ended up in the bathtub.

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korazylady

December 20, 2011 at 3:17 PM

I stand corrected! That makes us contemporaries, but as I said in a previous post, experiences in life form our opinions, and obviously this relates to me in a very personal way. Also, the fact that this was the first episode that you actually shed tears leads me to believe you are viewing more objectively and have time to notice little nuances. I have been a blurry, teary-eyed mess through most of it and am reacting on a purely emotional level.

Even after the finale, I'm sure we wouldn't interpret this drama the same. That's what makes the world go round!

BTW, actually my favorite ending would be if Hyang Gi and Ji Hyung do get together after Seo Yeon's death. In my mind he'll never love again like he did with Seo Yeon, but Hyang Gi will be happy to be with him no matter what, and he will be happy to have such a cheerful, loving partner and mother to his child. And honestly, I can't think of a better way to stick it to her mom! But I doubt very much that this writer will tie up the ends that way.

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CutieJamaican

December 20, 2011 at 5:28 PM

@Korazy Lady.....

Poor Ji Hung! He seems to be yearning for Cutie Lovable and is wondering:

“I didn’t know Cutie Lovable could look so fuckable right now in them wicked stiletto heels. Damn…Geeze look at her driving away in her happy yellow car and I am here wallowing in misery. Geesh. Aigoo!

What the fuck did I get myself into? What kind of fucking life is this? And she is not even sexy any more so I can’t get any punany and that was the main attraction.

But I’ll put on the best face, say I love you a million times to convince myself…she sure as hell doesn’t believe me…well I brought my ex who I used to shag into our matrimonial home…that should make her feel really good….well we were having an illicit hot booty affair so she ain’t all that…sorry …I am a man and that’s my double standard take it or leave it..

Nursing home? naw, too much guilt….just hurry up and die already. I have suffered enough. I paid my dues. Ancestors, Buddha help!

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Emelita

December 22, 2011 at 8:53 AM

Sounds like you or someone dear to you have been badly hurt in the past. Let it go; don't be bitter, be positive.

37 meirav

December 20, 2011 at 2:36 PM

thank u for the recap:)

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38 Kirita

December 20, 2011 at 4:48 PM

Gosh,.. boring at the beginning, too many yelling one to another, cry "here and there".... *sigh*
Now it comes..... just like V.Williams singing, ... "Save The Best for Last" .....
Thank goodness, i didn't dropped it at the early episodes...

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39 CutieJamaican

December 26, 2011 at 4:14 PM

@ Emilita... not bitter at all I just have a different spin on the story. I just do not accept the sincerity of the lead characters despite the million "I love Yous" and tears. I did not feel the love and I think the husband wished he had married his ex.

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40 pauline bernadhine m. villagracia

February 10, 2012 at 11:15 PM

this drama is so very very sad story, but one thing for sure this drama thought us how to love unconditionally... I'll salute to Ji-Hyung he's one of the million kind of man... Seo-yeon is so lucky girl to find Ji-Hyung....

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41 Irina

February 19, 2012 at 5:55 AM

Does anybody know the name of the poem Seo-yeon recites in the night? I've tried searching for it, and some search results say it's a work of Alfred de Musset, but I still cannot find the exact poem.

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42 Lilian

March 28, 2012 at 5:38 AM

I've really cried a lot for these last few episodes. Like you said, Kim Rae Won has really shone here. And it's my first time seeing Park Yoo Hwan act. So hope he does well in a lead role in his new drama...

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