I wonder how the connection from 'realistic' to kissing was made....especially since you specifically mentioned Misaeng, a drama which made it a point to have no romantic plotlines.

Sorry about that Annie. I did see where you were going with your comment and clicked on the wrong "Reply" link.

The comment really wasn't intended to single out anyone specific. It was a broader observation that often on this board "realistic" is used in conjunction with advocating for more graphic sexual content. As in, people asserting that 'realistic' kissing, nekkidness in bed, etc. would be a sign of advancement. That's what we're told to believe. But I disagree. Here's where I'm coming from:

We've been increasingly desensitized by overt sexual content on TV in the US, and are now seeing how it's influenced our culture. The trends are not positive.

The age of first sexual activity is going down, to the extent that it's starting to occur when kids are in grade school. Kids are most likely to become sexually active by giving in to pressure, and start before they feel ready. And as a result, kids overwhelmingly report that sexual activity leaves them feeling bad about themselves and sexually used. This is particularly true for young girls. With time, and multiple partners, they become desensitized to the unique bonding that sexual activity should create.

As these young people age, the degree of sexual activity they've had before marriage has been found to have a negative correlation with their happiness within marriage.
After marriage, they're increasingly dealing finding that their partners have addictions to pornography and sexual encounters. And are surprised by the sense of betrayal, inadequacy and relational insecurity it creates.

Divorce rates have skyrocketed. Divorce - and worries about the possibility of divorce - is a leading source of stress for their children. The children of failed and unhealthy marriages carry the emotional baggage of unresolved/unresolvable pain - and failure to see a healthy relationship modeled for them - into adulthood.

As wives age, they are more likely to be abandoned by their husbands. Husbands marry younger women, and older women are left with limited options until the point where they simply turn into a nurse-with-a-purse.

Yet, despite it's pivotal role in this cultural rot, our entertainment industry continues to push sexual boundaries in order to draw an audience based on cheap voyeurism rather than good storytelling. Voyeurism is advanced under the banner of 'progress'. And they'll continue to erode boundaries until the public says 'enough'.

Case in point: Fifty Shades of Grey. Experts - having read that book - conclude that it is a very thinly veiled story about pedophilia. The book 'says' the woman is in her early 20s. But experts say the character's real age is about 12. It's only a matter of time before the window dressing is taken off the real story, the stated age will creep lower and lower, and a whole new level of hell will be unleashed within our culture. Unless the public says 'enough, we don't want to go...

...go there.

Korea can spare itself the cultural effects of what we're seeing in the US if it keeps it's standards where they are. And export its unique brand of good storytelling to a broad global audience that has few other options.

@Gidget

Quite honestly, I'm not sure how the keyword "realistic" for drama can trigger such a well-worded wall of paleo-conservative propaganda.

I for one am glad that I can watch fiction on television that actually addresses real life problems once in a while. I don't believe in the theory that, if we ban any problems from TV, people will be brainwashed enough to go back to medieval social roles and live happily ever after.

@ Jon
If willingness to look objectively at both history and research results are 'propaganda' to you, just because the results aren't currently fashionable...well, I don't know what to say to that. Except that the one living in an intellectual cave might not be be. ;-)

Might not be me. ;-)

@ Gidget - As a child of divorced parents I have to unequivocally disagree with you. I was so much happier after 6 months that my 5th grade teacher brought me in to a conference with a classmate who's parents were divorcing. (with his permission). I was the first kid in the entire school with divorced parents. Also, my teenage daughter can not even imagine my parents married.

As for the rest - I'm with John. Besides, if parents don't talk with their kids whose fault is it really.

@PlumWine

Of course, there are always exceptions. :-)

@Gidget

I don't deny that some of your observations are based on facts. I just deny that your conclusions are established facts yet.

For example: It is true that children with divorced parents are more likely to become divorced themselves (which is not necessarily negative, btw).
It is also true that they are more likely to show mental issues or become criminals later (or other negative effects). HOWEVER, there is no established causality here.
In fact, many factors that lead to divorce (domestic violence, for example) also lead to problems in the development of children. Not the divorce causes later problems for the children, but the domestic violence (e.g.) causes both the divorce and the struggles. If you look at families that don't divorce despite of domestic violence, well, the children of those families have just as many problems.

There is one established negative impact of the divorce itself: In societies with low divorce rates, divorce is a terrible stigma for children. But this effect almost vanishes for many countries where divorce is not stigmatised.

Need to think more about what you say to give it the quality of response it deserves. But one impression comes quickly to mind.

The problem with sex education is that it's proven to do more to open the door to unhealthy sexual activity than it's done to close it. The rise in unhealthy adolescent sexual activity has correlated positively with exposure to sex education curriculum. And I'd say that advancing a child's exposure to sexual topics is like deliberately opening pandora's box. It piques curiosity. And makes exploration ok.

And a parent's advice will have far less traction when it contradicts the opinion of the peer group. Particularly when the child is at a stage in social development where they are naturally pulling away from their parents to establish themselves as independent individuals.

Not to mention the effect that emotionally unhealthy and broken homes have on the children of those homes. Those kids are far more likely to break with parental/adult guidance in order to gain the approval and acceptance of their peer group (as they seek to create a replacement for the support and stability that they should receive from a secure family unit) and get enmeshed in the pseudo comfort that a short term sexual 'relationship' provides.

Also, kids bodies' can start to 'want sex' long before their minds and emotions are ready to handle it. Not to mention the negative long-term emotional and relational impact that's created by having multiple - ultimately non-committed - sexual partners.

@Wag_a_Muffin
Exactly my thoughts too.

Again, thanks for your thoughtful post. I'll need to think about what you said (and create some time bandwidth to do it in).

@Gidget - Just where are you getting this information?

"I think both US shows and Korean dramas are two opposite and unhealthy extremes. Denying people’s sexuality and urges (especially true for women in kdrama) is just as bad as portraying them in an objectifying and abusive manner."

This pretty much says it all, the extremes in both are negative.

@PlumWine
Voracious reader, here. Lots of diverse sources. And I don't know what exactly what I should drill-down on. At a glance, Kinsey Institute has some easy reference points. Happy to dig into the details in a couple of days if that data seems questionable.

I do know what I'm saying is at odds with popular thinking today...and in particular, what's taught in a lot of University level gender-studies classes.

When I've dug into the deep weeds of that content - by looking at study methodologies and having had an inside view of how it's been funded and promoted at meta level - I wasn't persuaded by the substance of many of it's arguments.

I don't mean for this short post to be rude...simply no time today to post more. :-)

*claps* for Gidget and Wag_a_Muffin