Thing vs. Thing: Cradle-robbing Teachers
by javabeans
javabeans: With Big recently over, A Gentleman’s Dignity coming to a close, and a slew of noona romances both on the horizon and on the shelf in dramaland, we’ve been wondering: What, specifically, is the deal with cradle-robbing teachers?
girlfriday: You mean besides being every high-schooler’s fantasy at some point?
javabeans: You clearly did not go to my high school. Shudders. The median age must’ve been past retirement and the median hair color white.
girlfriday: Well that’s depressing. But most people have ONE young hot teacher in their lives, right?
javabeans: I’ll have to take your word for it. The interesting thing that came up a lot in Big discussions was the disgruntlement with the teacher-student trope—it’s clearly a breach of ethics in the real world, but romanticized in lots of dramas without that layer of sketchiness to cloud the matter.
girlfriday: It’s totally understandable why people might be up in arms about it. I guess it’s maybe a matter of being familiar and comfortable with the sub-genre, which presupposes a lot of things.
javabeans: I didn’t feel that the romances in either Big or Flower Boy Ramyun Shop were scandalous or immoral, but I say that while recognizing that in real life, I’d quite probably feel differently. There are a lot of things that dramaland does to neutralize the squick factor, like making Eun-bi a trainee who’s new on the job, or Kyung-joon a new student at a school where Da-ran isn’t his direct teacher and their time at the school overlaps literally by one day. But that line of reasoning can get slippery, where it becomes an attempt to justify.
girlfriday: Yeah, this is certainly a trope that works for me in dramaland and doesn’t make me go ick, but only if that conflict is addressed and dealt with. Like in Biscuit Teacher they don’t skirt around the issue, and she’s his actual homeroom teacher, so I’m okay with it when it’s dealt with in the context of the drama. She draws certain lines because of it, and that’s the big issue on the table.
javabeans: I wonder whether the discontent with the Big relationship is as much an indication of the romance’s failure as it is of the inherent teacher-student conflict. Because Ramyun Shop handled it much better, I thought, and resolved the romance in a more satisfying way.
girlfriday: Yes, I think Ramyun and Biscuit are both good examples of dealing with the conflict in a direct way: ie, I am your teacher so this cannot be, but why am I feeling this way? Whereas Big was about… something more confusing. I never got the sense from her that she FELT like his teacher.
javabeans: It was more like she felt like some random drive-by adult who had to take care of the poor widdle minor; that drama had a tendency to ignore things it didn’t want to deal with to an aggravating degree.
girlfriday: You mean like all the good stuff? The stuff we watch dramas for?
javabeans: Yes. It forgot to include that stuff.
girlfriday: I think if in Big her identity was more about being a teacher and less about being Yoon-jae’s fiancee, we’d have been in a better place actually, because anytime there’s something the audience might feel squicky about, if you have the character acknowledge that, it takes care of a lot of our worries.
javabeans: Yes, that’s another missed opportunity. Also, I think if in Big she had an identity, it would have taken care of a lot of our worries.
girlfriday: So it’s not so much the cradle-robbing part as the teacher part that got lost in that equation.
javabeans: I wonder if the time-skip device (at the end, inevitably justifying the reunion) has become too much of a crutch, though. Because you set up this great conflict, right? The age gap! The power imbalance! The seeming impossibility of the relationship! And then… zoom! Problem fixed by time.
girlfriday: But it’s sort of the one guarantee you have to have in this kind of narrative, because I have to trust that the hero’s going to be legal when all is said and done. I think the best versions of the story will deal with the conflict in real time, and they’ll choose love anyway, screw age and all that. But then to really get to HAVE the happily ever after, they have to wait.
javabeans: But the jailbait hero’s always 19 years old, right? Meaning he’s just months from being a legal adult anyway, so why then shoehorn in that time gap? One safety crutch per story, people!
girlfriday: I suppose they could do a version where they’re literally sitting around, waiting for his twentieth birthday to roll around. Ha.
javabeans: Okay, now that just made that waaaaay more creepy. Like those countdown clocks?
girlfriday: Right? That’s why with the time skip.
javabeans: I dunno. It seems to weaken its own punch, in my opinion. That’s why the student-teacher stories that speak more to me are the ones where the relationship actually cannot be—my favorite one is actually Unstoppable High Kick. So the longing and angst is the point of the story, coupled with the coming of age of the teenager, as opposed to the romance.
girlfriday: Yeah I love that kind of treatment of the student-teacher romance. And it’s also why Biscuit Teacher is my favorite, because it deals with that coming-of-age stuff so well, but also provides the fantasy wish-fulfillment of the romance.
javabeans: Those stories have a way of getting to me more, because they’re bittersweet and poignant in a way that reflects everyday life more. For instance, in High Kick, Jung Il-woo’s relationship became the runaway hit storyline of that show, because he had such perfect angst and misunderstood loner traits. The teacher was oblivious to his crush, but she also was the only one to reach out to him beyond his broody-rebel facade, which made the connection so unexpectedly sweet. It got to the point where you were just dying for them to end up together… even as you knew that it just wouldn’t work if they did… and that conflict just tore you up inside, in the best possible way.
girlfriday: Yes, that’s why I love this trope. Because it’s a totally logical angst, coupled with high school growing pains.
javabeans: Right? Because if they could end up together, you negate the power of that intense teenage heartbreak and therefore sap the conflict of its juice. It’s powerful because you root so hard for what cannot be.
girlfriday: Wait, why does Jung Il-woo always play teacher bait?
javabeans: Also Gong Yoo?
girlfriday: Seriously. What is it? Cheekiness?
javabeans: Youthful insouciance?
girlfriday: I got it. It’s the puppy eyes.
javabeans: And the puppy pout.
girlfriday: And that ineffable combination of adorable and hot.
javabeans: Yes, they’re both awesome at turning on the charm, then just as quickly pouring on the simmering intensity.
girlfriday: Also, this explains why they both make me go weak in the knees.
javabeans: “Noonaaaaaa….” *pout* *wiggle*
girlfriday: *dies*
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Tags: 1 show to rule them all, Big, Biscuit Teacher Star Candy, conversation post, featured, Flower Boy Ramyun Shop, Gong Yoo, Jung Il-woo, Thing vs. Thing, Unstoppable High Kick
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51 Lucille
August 25, 2012 at 9:01 PM
It seems to be a rite of passage for young boys to have a crush on a older women, most times it is their friend's mother or older sister, teachers it seems basically any older female that they come in contact with on a regular basis. Many men will admit to that. what matters is how the female reacts.
At first,the stories were simply older woman- younger man( just finished drama about the pregnant shoe designer, she was much older). In my book the student/teacher relationship storyline is simply a way to be controversal yet still touching on a subject matter that is becoming more open in society, the younger man-older woman relationship.
I watched the entire Big serie because she was never involved with the boy, she grew to love the essence of the person not the form, if that makes sense.
Ride out the wave, this is phase, the writers will get bored, hopefully sooner than later with the subject matter then we'll go back to 40s male lead playing opposite 20s female lead and alls will be well.
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Clelia
November 24, 2012 at 11:53 AM
"the writers will get bored,hopefully sooner than later with the subject matter then we’ll go back to 40s male lead playing opposite 20s female lead and alls will be well."
Hopefully?! And alls will be well?! A big no-no!
I think the 20-year age gap is just disgusting.Never was able to watch such movies.For me,only 5-6 years +/- is acceptable.
I'm in my 40's,and thinking of a man in his 60's...detestable! I would prefer hot guys in their 30's,but in this case,I would be odious or disgusting for them.
These noona romances are for ajummas to dream a little after a hard-working day.
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52 lynnet
September 4, 2012 at 6:55 AM
Thank you javabeans and girlfriday for talking about this issue, was beginning to think I was the only person who thought it was weird for dramas to keep pairing students with their teachers. I think it only works in Kdramas because its totally normal for the lead couple not to consummate their love whatever their age. In an American show one always expects the lead couple to have sex and the fact that they usually dont in Kdramas especially when its a student- teacher relationship reinforces the idea that this is a deep abiding affection not a story about a peadophile getting his groove on -its all in the purity of the story thats why majo no jouke is disturbing.
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53 Swati
October 16, 2012 at 12:10 AM
Hey Javabeans and Girlfriday,
I am not Korean nor a avid follower of K-Drama, but your writing styles makes me want to read these drama rather than watch them. It is like a novel/novella with the most interesting narration.
Your recaps actually made me watch some of the dramas just to ensure that the actors and the situation was as described by you.
I actually draw inspiration from you guys as a writer. :)
Thanks and keep up the good work.
Lots of love,
Swati
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54 Dan Strickland
October 26, 2012 at 3:17 PM
Late to the talk as usual, but something I've wondered about with these noona romance stories. There used to be a custom among Korean nobility of marrying sons, especially the oldest sons, at a very early age, like 10, to a girl 5 - 10 years older, who would then be his first wife and guide him into adulthood as it were, replacing his mother. I know what all this sounds like to western ears, but my wife comes from a family that used to follow that custom not that long ago (the 여주 민 family, for the curious) and I've heard my relatives defend the practice. Also, she and my mother in law used to enjoy teasing our son with threats of such a marriage when he was a kid. Didn't work too well, his response was, "she has to be hot!"
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55 Dan Strickland
October 26, 2012 at 3:18 PM
Oh, and I guess I missed making the point I set out to make - sometimes in K-drama the writers are making a point about older Korean customs....can't help but wondering if that's going on with these noona romances.
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